Page 109 of True Honey
“Oh you poor thing,” I feigned concern and winked at August before turning around in my seat. I hadn’t told Silas that I spoke to August, everything had been so insane that I never got the chance. He was coming home from the stadium after games and showering on auto pilot. He was too wound up and exhausted to even entertain sex, he usually just fell asleep curled against me. But I took a chance and reached across the divide to lay my hand upright for him.
He looked down at it in surprise and then over to me with a flicker of confusion as I wiggled them around for him.It’s okay.I mouthed and he looked back down at my hand, pushing his fingers between mine and giving it a gentle squeeze.
And just like that every piece of the puzzle slipped together with such ease.
“Don’t worry, I made a playlist.” Silas reached over and scrolled through the menu, throwing on whatever monster he had created and Savage Garden flowed through the speakers causing me to laugh out loud. “There’s no way you just laughed at the Savage Garden!”
“I don’t know how I didn’t see the wholeDad Rockthing before, it was right in front of my face the entire time,” I scoffed in disbelief as he smiled brightly at me, enjoying the teasing. “You could have at least eased me into it.”
“Oh, Gardeniseasing you into it,” Silas chuckled and turned his attention to the road. The drive was nice, August spent most of the time playing on his phone and ignoring our adult conversations.
“You grew up out here?” I asked when the highways became nothing but thick forest for miles on either side.
“Yeah, they built the cottage for team building and weekend retreats but it became this place for my Mom to get away, and she’s always hated the quiet so usually we got dragged along.” Silas explained.
“Arlo?” I asked. It had been weeks of asking him questions I already knew the basic answers to. But I liked hearing his side of the answers, they were so different then what Arlo had coldly written in the binder.
“Yeah, and Nicholas… and their older brothers Lucas and Sawyer.”
“There’s four King brothers?” I asked, knowing the basics.
“Yeah, all four insanely talented baseball prodigies…” he sighed. “Arthur ruined them with the pressure, thinking he could make them even better but it only made them resent each other and the sport.”
“Arlo still coaches though.” I said.
Silas smiled and nodded, “it would take a lot more than drunk Arthur King and a few slaps to make Arlo hate baseball. He’ll play and coach until the day he dies.”
“And you’ll be right there with him,” I said and Silas’s grip faltered on my hand slightly.
“That’s the plan,” are the words that came out of his mouth but they weren’t believable. He was holding on to so much stress between the team, his grandfather, us, and the trial. It was insane to watch a man seemingly so soft and humble, stand up to the wind like he was made of steel. “Look,” he said, directing my attention to the incredible structure at the end of the driveway.
“That’s not a cabin,” August said, leaning through the middle of the seats. “That’s a resort.”
“Had to be big enough for everyone,” Silas said, like that was the natural explanation.
There were people and cars littered the driveway, so many it’s impossible to count as they moved around the gravel talking to one another and hauling things from the backs of vehicles.
“What is going on?” I asked, turning to look at him as he parked.
“A wedding.”
The panic that filled my body when the word wedding left Silas’s beautiful mouth was biblical. It rose up my body and hit me in the chest so fast it felt like someone had run me over with a car. I inhaled sharply and stared at him, not registering a single word coming out of his mouth.
August climbed from the car and I froze, unable to form words to explain the fear coursing through me. Silas grabbed my face and brought us closer together, slowing his breathing down until I was able to follow his lead.
“Not ours,” he said, his tone soft. “Ella and Arlo.”
I let my tongue fall from the roof of my mouth and worked back the urge to sob in his arms. I swear my soul left my body.
“I’m sorry I scared you… I wasn’t thinking—”
“No, no. It’s okay,” I choked out, pleading with my heart to slow down.
Silas looked like I had broken his heart and it only made how guilty and anxious I felt worse. It stung in the most agonizing way as he worked through his own disappointment at my reaction to calm me down.
“I’m sorry, I—” I stopped trying to catch my breath. “You wouldn’t want that,” I said quietly, “it’s not what you want.” I choked down the urge to cry as I tried to explain to him that taking this further than what we were doing…making the ring real. It was a mistake. I could barely manage my own emotions, the intrusive depression that threaded through my mind every waking hour. I couldn’t trap him in life, which meant always having to look after me in some capacity. I wouldn’t.
“Don’t tell me what I want and don’t want,” he leaned forward, forcing me to look at him. “I didn’t take your fear as a refusal, Drew. It’s just another challenge.” His gray eyes never left mine, his words slow and said with an intense intention. “Do you understand?”
