Page 121 of Honeysuckle
“That’s bullshit. I shouldn’t be involved at all. I never even spoke to the man before opening day!” I stepped forward, and Coach tensed behind Silas. “I’m not going to hit anyone, you can call off your guard dog,” I grumbled at Silas and tried to relax a little as Dean followed my movements into the living room.
“You first,” Silas nodded, his eyes flickering up to Dean’s behind me.
Sylwia cleared her throat, and we both turned to look at her. "Josh, I know that all of this is very difficult and I’m acutely aware that you didn’t ask for any of it to be thrust upon you like this, but it’s here now. We’ve protected you from the press for as long as we can, the feds will go public with the case when the trial date is set and when that happens…”
“It’ll be a free-for-all,” I whispered.
“Yes.” Sylwia was far too kind for someone who had been hurt as much as I had. She was a victim too, it was clear in her stance. “You have to understand that they’ll twist the narrative, they’ll use you as a weapon, and if you don’t speak out about it, it will only give them reason to dig deeper,” Sylwia lowered her voice and stared me directly in the eyes.
“We have to get ahead of it, Josh,” Silas added. “And we need to do it fast, the longer we wait, the worse this will get.”
“So I don’t have a choice?” I said, looking around at the three of them. “Out myself as the bastard Shore son or have them tell the world about my sordid past?”
“That’s a funny way to say painful childhood.” Sylwia gave me a soft smile. “You have a choice, Joshua,” she said, using my full name like a weapon. “If you choose to stay quiet, you have my promise that we’ll do everything we can to protect you. You’ve suffered enough at the hands of,” she paused, her breath short before she continued, “my husband. There’s no need for you to suffer more.”
There was something about the way she said it that made me turn to face her, our shoulders lined up. She was practically taller than me but there was nothing about her that was menacing. She just held her polite smile and waited for me to figure it out on my own clock.
“How long have you known?” I asked her, I expected her to turn to Silas for reassurance, but she held my gaze.
“Silas came to me the second he found out,” she said, and I turned to him.
“You would be a momma’s boy,” I grumbled. We had fought about that more than once, and he’d told me that she didn’t know. But Silas was a fucking loud mouth.
“She deserved to know, Josh, whether or not I had your consent,” he argued.
“I don’t disagree.” I scowled. "What was your first reaction when he told you?”
Sylwia smiled at me still, her resolve unshakeable. “I was angry.”
“At my mother? About me?” I asked.
“At myself,” she said without hesitation. “I was too in love with a man who never had the intention of reciprocating that love, Josh. I was angry at myself for being a fool, angry that I never noticed the signs. Angry that he left you in that mess…” she trailed off.
“Oh, so you told her everything,” I said, my voice breaking. “I guess that makes us kindred souls,” I said to her. "Anger is all I feel.”
Dean tensed beside.
“All I felt,” I corrected myself, and he loosened the breath he was holding.
“Going to the press isn’t about revenge or justice,” Silas said. "It’s about protecting the narrative and your future.”
I turned away from his mother and ran my hands through my hair as I tossed my head back, trying to make sense of my panic. On the one hand, letting go of the information would feel great; I’d feel free. Released from the cage I’d be locked in. The Shore-shaped padlock was on the verge of being cut. On the other hand, it would disrupt everything I had built. Suddenly, my entire life would be in question.Did he do anything himself? Or is he just another Nepo-baby thriving under the Shore family name?
I swallowed tightly, the fear tipping the scales in favor of continuing on in silence.
“Josh,” Dean’s voice broke through the thoughts and I turned to look at him, still standing close with his arms crossed over his chest. His blue eyes were on fire and his jaw was tight from listening to the argument, holding his tongue and letting me get through it. He was too brave for his own good and it killed me.
“He doesn’t deserve peace,” Dean said, quiet but firm.
I cleared my throat and steadied my racing heart as I held his gaze.
No more words passed between us but I understood then that if Dean could find his courage to stand up to his parents, I could find the strength to stand up to mine. I nodded once and turned to Silas. "If we’re doing this then the team needs to know first. No surprises.”
“There’s no time for that.” Silas shook his head. "We have to sit down and put out a statement tonight.” He argued.
“You smell that?” I asked, relaxing my shoulders as Silas sighed in defeat.
“Josh,” Silas pushed, clearly losing his patience.
