Page 33 of Clean Sweep
Ethan’s voice pulled me out of a stupor of thought. I blinked. “Sorry, what?”
“I don’t know what’s going on with him, It’s like he’s lost his mind.”
“Starla is very nice,” Kate said quietly. “I don’t think she’s putting pressure on him. Whatever is going on seems to stem from Landon.”
Another knife twisted in my gut. Kate had met Starla before I did. What was happening here? How had my earth tilted on its axis again?
“Thank you for telling me,” I said calmly. “Things have seemed fine between me and Landon but . . . apparently we’re having a hard time with details. I’m not sure where this breakdown in communication has happened. Or why, for that matter.”
The dubious question that lingered in Ethan’s eyes probably meant that had been part of the reason he’d stopped by—to see what was going on between me and Landon. Did Ethan blame me for this wedding date?
Maybe.
Regardless, something must be bothering Landon for him to avoid me so completely about it.
“He introduced Starla to me and told me about medical school all at the same time,” I said, just to fill the silence. “Maybe he didn’t tell me about the wedding because he wanted to give me some time to get used to this.”
Ethan shrugged.
Clearly, neither of us believed that.
He had a sip of coffee and we all sat in the contemplative silence for a few more breaths.
“Well.” I forced more cheer in my voice than I felt. “Thank you for bringing it to my attention. I’ll speak with Landon. Can you let me know if you hear anything from him about details? I believe I’m out of the loop and would like some assurance of what’s really going on.”
“Of course.”
Our mostly-amicable divorce meant we hadn’t been too uncomfortable with each other since it happened. Granted, there was weirdness there. The splitting of a shared life didn’t come without ghosts, but I felt no ill will toward Ethan. As far as I knew, he hadn’t cheated on me. I hadn’t been unfaithful to him. We’d just let whatever we once had die, then we lived with it for as long as either of us could tolerate.
For fifteen minutes, the three of us shared small talk. I learned about how he met Kate online, and shoved away the question that wondered,is it time for me to date again?
When Tanner immediately surfaced in my mind afterward, I knew I was doomed.
When the small talk ceased and it no longer felt simple, Ethan and Kate made a quick exit. I sat at the booth in a storm cloud of uncertainty. New panic, new emotions, new questions swirled up in the wake of their departure.
Since when hadEthanbeen the trusted parent?
When had I fallen from grace?
Did all the boys feel this way?
Landon was the oldest of four. My second oldest, Max, who called every other Sunday, kept in contact with me. His athletic obsession and rising stardom in college football meant if anyone could go pro, it was Max.
The third child, Nicholas, had always been my quiet one. He’d disappeared into work in the mountains hundreds of miles north of here, in a small town called Livvy that I’d never heard of. Last I heard, he’d found work on a logging rig. Before that, he bussed tables at a local diner and split firewood in between.
Twenty years old and living on pure gumption. He texted me more than any of the boys, but rarely called.
Then there was Blake. The only one stuck at home until he graduated and found a trade school that would get him into fixing motorcycles.
The quick scan of my offspring only produced more uncertainty. I hated feeling insecure about my parenting, and the divorce had only compounded that. Thankfully, Dahlia plopped in front of me with her white-toothed smile and curly black hair.
“Rough couple days, boss lady,” she quipped.
“Yes, it’s been interesting.”
She nudged a cupcake my way with a wink. “Here. Eat this. On the house. Every mom needs a little sugar therapy now and then.”
I bit into the rich buttercream and let thoughts of Landon dissolve away.
