Page 90 of Coffee Shop Girl
When I moved to leave, his hand on my wrist stopped me. I looked back in wordless question.
“I wanted you to have the first pass at the rental agreement,” he continued, as if everything that lay between us suddenly wasn’t there. But his eyes didn’t quite meet mine, and the knot in my chest tightened. “I wanted to ... I wanted to help.”
Hanging on to the last vestige of my pride, I said, “The offer is kind. I appreciate the place of care that it originated from, but I’m able to take care of myself and the girls without you. Just like you wanted.”
His expression clouded. I felt the crack all the way down the center of my heart. I slipped through the house, walking away as fast as I could. He followed, not saying a word until I reached the door.
“Wait.”
My hand gripped the doorknob. I felt a traitorous fluttering in my chest at the sound of his voice. Maybe he’d say it. Stop me. Confess whatever fear paralyzed him.
“Can I say goodbye to the girls?”
Pain I hadn’t felt since Dad died filled my chest again. I wanted to sayno. I wanted to tell him to just go and stay away. Seeing him again would be torture. It would be hard enough being in the coffee shop without him.
But Lizbeth and Ellie had experienced enough loss without closure.
“Tomorrow afternoon is fine.”
The feeling of his eyes boring into my back followed me to the car. I shut the door, turned the key in the ignition, and pulled away with full composure. He hadn’t budged. Always stagnant. Alone in his isolated bubble.
The bubble that outrated me.
All of us.
Everyone.
The tires skidded on the rocks as I peeled away with a sob.
30
Maverick
She drove away.
A cloud of dust whirled behind her car, which quickly disappeared among the trees. The whispered remnants of her words and the inescapable sense that I had just made a mistake haunted me.
She didn’t get it yet.
She didn’t understand that expectations led to disappointment and, ultimately, heartbreak. In the end, she’d be better off without me failing her. The way I had constantly failed Dad, which led to his ultimate demise.
The right thing had never felt so awful.
31
Bethany
My head pounded the next morning.
Despite lying awake until 2:00 a.m., tears silently soaking my pillow, more grief lingered behind my eyes. My rage at our conversation had ebbed into a low, pulsing heartache. How had I fallen so hard? He’d invaded my life and painted himself all over it, and now he’d leave. Everything in Pineville had echoes of Maverick. The grocery store. The bar. The Italian restaurant.
Even the coffee shop still smelled like him.
By three, I gave in and headed downstairs to make the frappuccino bases for the day. The quiet repose was a welcome escape, so I flipped the sign on, tied my apron, and turned to my to-do list. If some random trucker wanted to stop by and get some caffeine, I’d take their money. While I worked through the daily preparations, my traitorous mind spun over his kiss. The heat in my belly.
To shove the thoughts away, I looked at my bank accounts.
The morning rush came and went. I moved through it like a machine. Ellie and Devin showed up at seven. They were playing out in the reeds five minutes later. Lizbeth popped awake around eleven, while I shoved caffeine into the hands of as many people as I could, silently tallying the dollars.
