Page 31 of Win Some Love Some
I wrapped my fingers around the side of the boat in a death grip. Breathing through my nose, I struggled for composure.
“Time costs him money, you know,” I said between clenched teeth. Which is why I would have flung myself over the side of the boat before admitting defeat.
“We’re not that far out yet,” Nick said. “And don’t pretend you’re not grateful. You need me to get you a ginger ale?”
Even though I barely went out anymore, Dad always kept ginger ale stocked in the cooler on board. I’d practically been raised on this boat. How was it possible that I was the only person in my family stricken with seasickness?
My stomach lurched and bubbled and I nodded tightly.
Nick ducked inside the cabin and I did what my dad always told me to do when I first started to get sick – I focused my eyes out to the indigo blue line where the horizon met the sea.
The truth could not be more obvious. I would not be working on my dad’s boat.
So, what the heck was I going to do?
The snap and fizzle of a soda being opened announced Nick’s return. He pushed the ice cold can into my hands and the first thing I did was rub it against my forehead. So cold. Then my neck, each side.
“Yes,” I whispered, shivering in the immediate relief of the shock of cold against my skin. Grateful, I took a sip.
It was crisp and tart and my stomach almost immediately settled down. I moaned and licked my lips.
“Thanks,” I said and glanced up at Nick who had this weird look on his face. “What? Please tell me I don’t have puke on my face.”
He blinked and shook his head like he was startled by something. “No, no puke.”
“I’m not going to be able to work the boat,” I said.
“Nope.”
I took another grateful gulp of the soda. The boat made a wide turn, back to the dock. The bow crashed into our own wake and I moaned in misery. I’d failed again. If I said that, Nick would no doubt tell me to stop feeling sorry for myself. And maybe he’d be right.
“I need a job,” I said.
“You had a job. A whole career. Why don’t you just start doing videos again?”
“So all the trolls can find me and attack?” I shook my head. “No thanks.”
“It’s gotta die down at some point.”
“It doesn’t matter. I’m not that person anymore,” I said, which was the painful truth. I didn’t know who I was at the moment, but I wasn’t her. Smiling into a camera, so sure of my opinion and taste and charm.
“Okay, why can’t you take all your social media skills and work for a company?” Nick sat down beside me. Our thighs touched and I shifted away so fast Dad glanced over at us and then back out at the water. “Digital marketing is something everyone needs,” Nick said, like he didn’t notice the heat of my body next to him, the way I noticed his.
Just friends. Only friends.
Pretend. Pretend. Pretend.
“There are probably twenty businesses in Calico Cove who’d hire you right now.”
I shook my head, just the thought of it made me feel nervous. Watched. Doomed to fail.
“I need something physical,” I said, stretching my body and drinking more ginger ale. Even feeling sick to my stomach was better than feeling numb – which I’d been feeling for too long. “Something completely different than what I was doing. I really wanted to be a lobster woman.”
Nick threw back his head and laughed.
“What? It’s an honest living!”
“Of course it is. For anybody but you. Nor, you got squeamish the second we stepped on the boat. You apologize to the bait before you attach it to the trap. This is not the job for you.”
