Page 37 of Of Literature and Lattes
“I’m sorry. You deserve and will get better from me.”
“One more chance.” He held a single finger between them.
“Yes, sir.”
“And stop callin’ me ‘sir.’ I work for a living.” A smile cut the bite in his words.
“Yes, Jasper.”
A car pulled up to the full-service island. The driver tapped the horn to move Alyssa, who was standing in the way.
Jasper stepped forward, but Alyssa held out her hand and moved to the side. “I got this.”
“Okay then. I’ll get back to that carburetor.”
She turned toward the car’s driver and froze. Then, with only a minute hitch in her step, she summoned all her courage and walked around the late-model Volvo wagon as the window rolled down.
“What in the blue blazes are you doing here? You’re supposed to be setting the world on fire out in Palo Soprano.”
“Hey, Grandma. Palo Alto.” She leaned in and kissed her grandmother’s cheek. “I’m back.”
“Back for what?” Her grandmother peered around the gas station. “A summer internship?”
Alyssa leaned down and looked straight through the car’s windows. Her grandma’s volume and tone, if not her words, had captured Jasper’s attention. He had rounded the corner again and stood listening.
Without waiting for an answer, her grandmother continued. “You didn’t tell me you were coming home, and she certainly didn’t. Never tells me a thing, just manages me without so much as a by-your-leave... Never mind, dear, I’m glad to see you. I hope she didn’t move you or make you leave what you love.”
There was only ever onesheandher. Janet.
Alyssa reached for the pump and pushed the Regular tab. “Not at all, Grandma. This was my idea. I... I may go back, but I left my job and had the summer free.”
“That’s wonderful. What did she say about all that?” Her grandmother leaned out the window.
“I haven’t really talked to her yet. She went to Chase’s to visit Rosie.”
“It takes three years for you to visit, and she leaves to visit a granddaughter she’s visited four times last month alone?”
Alyssa felt the past convict her. Every time her mom thwarted what she wanted or came against her in any way, she always found a welcome and often eager ear in her grandmother. And her grandmother, always soft and easy on her, never let Janet off the hook. Alyssa had played into that for years, fully aware of what she was doing, savoring the sense of camaraderie, even victory, as her grandmother took every single one of her complaints and recategorized each as her own daughter’s offense.
It would be so easy, Alyssa thought, so tempting to go there again. She would no longer be alone.
She couldn’t do it.
Maybe it was that light she saw in her mom’s eyes, maybe it was Lexi’s comment that she had changed, maybe it was Jasper watching her, or maybe it was what her mom had said when she walked out the door several days before.
“She needed to go, Grandma. She wouldn’t have left if it weren’t absolutely necessary.” Alyssa rushed on to avoid more questions. “Why don’t I come by for dinner tonight and we’ll catch up? I can tell you about everything then.”
“Like why my granddaughter is pumping gas at a service station?” Her grandmother held her credit card out her open window.
Alyssa swiped the card and prayed Jasper couldn’t catch the words or the tone. “Yes. Exactly that.”
“Fine.” Her grandmother stretched her cheek to the window. “I’ll make my meat loaf.”
Alyssa bent to deliver the card and a kiss, then stepped back. “I’ll see you at six thirty.”
As the car rolled away, Alyssa’s mind returned to that last conversation she’d had with her mom, and she wondered how much, if any of it, she would be pressed to repeat to her grandmother.
Janet had stood in the kitchen, hands clasped together like she was trying to keep herself contained. “I’m going to go help out with Rosie for a few days and give you some space. I know you need to be here, and if you had any other option you’d take it. And this isn’t a power play; I’m not trying to make your life hard. Just the opposite.”
