Page 26 of A Night of Indulgence and Sloth
“Afraid of heights, are you?” I ask, placing my hand on the small of her back.
“Not usually, but this glass is really messing with me.” She takes a step back, shaking her arms like that might help rid herself of the fear.
“I won’t let anything happen to you, Lily. I promise.” Our eyes lock for a moment that feels more like a lifetime. The need to pull her closer, to have her in my arms, consumes me, and I’m on the brink of throwing caution to the wind and just shooting my shot when clapping erupts around us.
We both turn toward the guests to see what’s happening, but they aren’t looking at us. The lights of the CN Tower are finally on.
Lily’s shocked gasp tells me she’s noticed, and we stand there, watching the lights flicker and change. But I’ve already seen the tower lit up a hundred times before. Why would I watchthat again when I could settle my gaze on the beautiful woman at my side and catch the colors glinting in her eyes.
Only when more people join us at the glass railing do we realize just how long we’ve been standing there. We’ve got an early flight tomorrow, and a quick look at my watch lets me know it’s long past time for us to head back to our rooms, even if I don’t want to.
We’re silent in the elevator, both stuck in our heads. My thoughts are on her and I wonder - no, I hope - that she’s thinking of me as well.
Our rooms are on opposite sides of the hall, and as we stand at our respective doors, it feels like neither one of us wants to go our separate ways. But are we ready to take that step? For me, it’s not even a question, but for her… I don’t want to rush her. I don’t want her too caught up in the beauty of this night that she makes a decision she’ll regret in the morning. I can’t risk her leaving us. She’s too important.
With that in mind, I say goodnight, entering my room and letting my door shut only once I know she’s safe inside her own.
Releasing a shuddering breath, I rest my back against the door and tell myself again and again that I made the right choice. Even though it feels like half my heart is in the room with her.
My legs struggle to move, like they’re no longer under my control, but I force them to action. Force myself away from the door and into the living room of my suite.
Away from the temptation that is Liliana Sinclair.
Liliana
The passage of time is fickle. When things go wrong, it feels like everything moves in slow motion. Like the world is working against you and trying to make things worse. But when life is good, time speeds up. Suddenly, weeks have passed, months turn into years, and you can’t figure out where the time went.
For most of my life, it’s felt like time was my worst enemy. Until now. Now I’m barely able to keep track of the days that seem to speed by me in the blink of an eye. The work I’m doing with Exalta Solutions is an enormous part of my recent happiness, but it’s not just that. It’s the people, too.
When I first realized who Aiden was, I almost quit. Fear had gripped me so tightly that I couldn’t picture staying, not with him there, and certainly not after everything he’d done to me that night at Club Rapture. But now, I can’t picture working for any other company or for any other owners. It feels like home.
Weeks have passed since that first day. Weeks full of challenges that keep me on my toes and some days, I even get to teach them a thing or two. When Kaleb isn’t traveling, he joinsme for a swim before work. More often than not, when Aiden isn’t on the road, he’s working out in the gym while we swim, and even though I thought things would be incredibly awkward with him, he hasn’t explicitly said anything untoward. He’s definitely hinted at it on more than a few occasions, but even those have grown on me. I’m like a whole other person, and even Calantha has noticed.
Yesterday was her graduation day, so she’s now officially a vet tech and has one blissful week off before she starts her new job only a few blocks from my work.
Despite my inner turmoil, she went out with a few of her fellow graduates to celebrate last night and proved, once again, that I had nothing to worry about. I slept like total shit, despite all the progress I thought I’d made, but I wouldn’t beat myself up over it. She still went out while I stayed home, which is already a step up from before.
Now that Calantha has a second coffee and every smell isn’t threatening to make her throw up, we walk through the shops at Brookfield Place, hoping to find a dress suitable for the goddamn charity gala. Not that I could afford anything truly worthy.
I stop the fearful thoughts before they get started, not allowing myself to worry about what people will think and how easy it’ll be for them to tell that I don’t belong. Because I do. Aiden and Kaleb want me there, and that’s enough for me.
I try not to let it go to my head. They want me there because I’m their assistant, and they bought a company table. That’s all. Just because I can’t stop lusting after them doesn’t mean it’s reciprocated.
“Oh, that dress is pretty,” Calantha says, pointing toward a dress in the window of Adam Lippes before heading toward the store entrance.
Shaking off my thoughts, I focus on the task at hand. As much as I might wish I didn’t care what others think, the hardtruth is that I do. I want to fit in, so I’ll do everything in my power not to stick out like a sore thumb.
As we walk into the chic store, I can already tell this place is way out of my budget, and Calantha figures that out as soon as she checks the price tags on the items we pass.
“Can I help you?” A rather snobby looking sales woman walks over to us, her face stoic and lacking warmth.
“No, thank you. We’re just looking,” I reply. Damn. I forgot this was why I never went shopping. Well, this and the lack of disposable income, but the snooty way some of these store clerks treated me was a damn fine reason on its own.
“Of course. We have a sale rack in the back if you’re looking for something a little more… budget friendly.” She looks down her nose at us once more before walking back to the counter.
“Even if we could afford this place, there’s no way in hell I’d help pay that bitch’s wage. Let’s go find a place with more personable staff.” Calantha waves her fingers to the rude woman as we leave, and we both giggle as we head off in search of a more affordable store.
“As much as I love New York, I don’t think we could have picked a more expensive city to live in.” I sigh, not wanting to admit defeat, yet knowing my heart just isn’t in it anymore. I loved the idea of shopping, but I always ended up more disappointed than happy. Worries fly through my mind like eagles, diving fast and tearing apart any hope I have of making a good impression. If I don’t find something suitable, I’ll be letting Aiden and Kaleb down, and that thought leaves me more depressed than I care to admit.
