Page 18 of Blackwarden
“How...?”
He met my wide eyes with that sultry smirk of his. The one he wore when he was hiding behind his beautiful face. The light from the brazier gilded his obsidian horns and accentuated the sharp angle of his jaw.
“Come now, Ms. Greene,” he said, voice low and rough. “I don’t think we’re finished talking.”
My breath hitched. Where once I’d found him terrifying, now I choked on something far more dangerous. My fingers itched to weave through his midnight hair and push the soft waves back from his eyes. To follow the pointed tips of his ears. Desire, hot and wholly unwelcome, unfurled within me and pulsed through my veins.
My mouth went dry as my eyes followed the column of his throat down. I wanted to trace his collar bones slowly with my lips, lingering at the base of his neck. I ached to close the distance between us, to map the line that ran down the center of his chest with my tongue. To feel his firm muscles beneath my fingers.
I shouldn’t want him.
And I hated myself for it.
I took in a sharp breath and tried to look away, but I couldn’t. I needed to, but the way his hands rested on his hips—elegant and effortless.Those hands.How would they feel gliding over my skin? Holding my arms over my head?
His pupils dilated, the smirk slipping from his lips as his body stiffened.
He could feel my emotions.
The heat that had been building in my core soared into my cheeks. The flicker of realization in his eyes terrified me more than anything else. He felt it all. Every. Terrifying. Desire. My hunger. My need.
My shame.
I rushed past him, ducking into the safety of my room and slamming the door before he could say another word.
––––––––
That night I didn’t go to dinner. I couldn’t sit at that table and feel his dark eyes slip along the lines of my face. Not after the incident in the hall. My stomach bottomed out every time I thought of his voice, the golden light on his skin. I needed to get my emotions under control or risk mortifying embarrassment every time I noticed his reaction to one of my wildly inappropriate emotions.
At the time, it seemed like a good idea, but it was nearly midnight, and my stomach wouldn’t stop grumbling. I was genuinely curious if I could scrounge up a snack. I had seen a door that looked like it led from the dining room into a kitchen of sorts. Why else would a house have a kitchen if not to store and prepare food?
I snuck out of my suite, closing the door as quietly as I could. I glanced up at the brazier, burning as though it required no fuel other than the frustration seething in my chest. An ominous slowness to the flames froze me in place as I watched, uneasiness settling around me like heavy shadows.
I cleared my throat. “I’m hungry, okay?” I had never felt so judged in all my life and by a house no less.
I slipped down the hall and around the corner to the main corridor. Keres had warned me that I needed to stay in my room after midnight. But it wasn’t quite midnight, and I’d be quick. Plus, he hadn’t exactly explainedwhyI needed to stay in my room after midnight. Perhaps there was some monster that stalked these halls at night. Perhapshestalked the halls at night. I shivered but didn’t turn back.
I hadn’t been aware of the stillness that smothered everything once the sun set. If I thought the Gatehouse was creepy during the day, the all-encompassing silence that cloaked the entire mansion after midnight, was downright foreboding. Most houses offered some hint of the outside world—the wind, the chirp of insects, thefamiliar trappings of night. The Gatehouse, however, was the purest form of suffocating quiet. It made every breath I took sound four times louder.
I exhaled a sigh of relief as I slipped into the dining room. The last thing I wanted was to run into Keres after everything that had transpired earlier in the day. It would have been hard to explain. How did you tell a broody Fae that you couldn’t handle another moment gazing at his gorgeous face? Especially when he seemed to know exactly how gorgeous he was and was more than happy to stare right back.
I eased the mystery door open and was rewarded with a well-appointed kitchen. A row of cupboards lined one wall, broken into two sections by a massive workbench. A bread oven took up a large portion of another wall, with a workbench and a wash basin. Tiptoeing to the main workbench, I plucked a ripe green apple from a bowl heaped with fruit and pressed it to my lips while savoring the scent of it. The sound of my teeth ripping through the peel seemed louder than it should have, but I didn’t care. It was perhaps the most delicious apple I’d ever eaten and for a moment I was lost in memories of my sister. How many times had we shared an apple at the market, or sitting in the sun-warmed grass along the road to our little house.
I missed Renee dreadfully, but I was satisfied with my choice to come in her place. She wouldn’t have handled all the dark strangeness as well. She likely would have hidden in her suite, only coming out for food if she could muster the bravery.
As I took more bites, Renee’s sweet smile wafted through my memories. I ran my fingers over the workbench until they met another bowl. This one was covered with a tea towel and my curiosity got the better of me. I peeked under, finding a mound of rolls nestled beneath. Taking two, I finished the apple, discarding the core in a waste bin before I ducked back into the dining room.
I ate one of the rolls while loitering at the window. I could see nothing through the darkness of night. I knew there were treeswith creepy black leaves, and part of me was happy I couldn’t see them. The buttery flavor of the scrumptious dinner roll filled my stomach with unexpected warmth, and I closed my eyes. I could see my mother’s bread, perfectly flaky on the outside encapsulating a pillow of delicious heaven.
Sneaking back down the main corridor, I paused before turning down the hall toward my room. The library was to the right. Keres was likely asleep and couldn’t disturb me at this hour. I could rummage through the cupboards without interruptions. I took a bite of the second roll and turned to the right, determined to finish where I’d left off before he’d so rudely surprised me earlier.
I opened the door just enough to slip through, praying to the Mother the hinges wouldn’t give me away. There were two braziers glowing on the far side of the library that flared brighter with my presence. Part of me wished I could have avoided the attention of the Gatehouse entirely, but it was likely unavoidable. I was, after all, inside it, and whether it slept at all was a question for another time.
I scoured the shelves, fingers itching with curiosity as they flowed over the spines. If I remembered correctly, there was a book on the far wall that had interested me. A symbol on the bottom of the spine was the only identifier. Once I found it, I slipped it from the shelf and dropped into one of the chairs beside a brazier, opening the book across my lap. I stuffed the remains of the second roll between my lips and thumbed through the pages.
If I’d been more attentive as a child, I might have learned what some of the Old Fae script meant, but as it was the characters were strange, looping in and out of one another as they twined together into clusters of what I could only assume were sentences. I couldn’t read it, and my frustration grew as I realized my entire midnight endeavor might have been for nothing. It threatened to burst from my chest in a loud growl. I slammed the book closed, glaring at the symbol on the cover as though it was the cause of all my troubles. I’d likely found exactly what I needed but wasn’t able to get any answers from it.
I traced my fingers over the surface of the leather tooling, following the curve of the symbol. Keres wore it on a pendant around his neck. What exactly did it mean? Other than telling me it was his family name, a non-answer, he’d refused to give me more information. It was just another question he ignored. I hated that he seemed happy enough to answer some questions but not others.
