Page 208 of Seven Oars
“Fine, fine. I was afraid I’d wake you up.”
“No, no, I’m not going to bed yet. How was the concert?”
“It rocked. It’s a bummer you didn’t go.”
They sat down, with Paloma perched on the edge of the chair.
“I told Ren I couldn’t come,” Rosamma said.“My translation materials are finally here, and I have to work.”
She lifted the sheaf of pages as if to prove her point.
Paloma frowned.“And last week, you didn’t go with us to the game night.”
“I’m not much of a bingo person.” Rosamma wrinkled her nose.“I’m sorry.”
“And the weekend before, you missed the trip to the mountains because you had to help Gro with a mushroom spore delivery.”
“Yes,” Rosamma said, smiling
Paloma didn’t smile back.“Is it us? You don’t like our company? Me?”
“No! It isn’t you at all. I like you very much.” Rosamma set the papers down and reached for Paloma’s hand, holding it firmly.“Whatever gave you that idea?”
Paloma scooted closer, nearly sliding off her chair.“Remember back home? You spoke constantly about how you wanted to go out and do stuff. How you wished to be better and stronger so you could hang out with Ren and me, swim in the lake, walk in the streets, and meet people where your appearance didn’t draw attention. Rosamma, that time is now. You don’t have to stay in your room all day.”
Rosamma thought for a moment.“I don’t stay in all day. I go out, you know. I walk daily, it’s good exercise.”
“You walk by yourself.”
Rosamma studied Paloma, searching for the right way to explain herself to the friend who tried so hard to draw her out. To convey that she was no longer the despondent and dependent young woman she had been on Meeus, who got her insights into life, love, and men from books.
“You may think I’m hiding, Paloma, but I’m not. I’m not lonely. I have you and Ren, and Gro, and a couple of others at the greenhouse whose company I enjoy. I am content with my solitary walks.”
“You’re waiting forhim,” Paloma said, voice low with reproach.
“Well, yes.” She raised a hand before Paloma could interrupt.“But it has nothing to do with how I chose to spend my time.”
“Oh, doesn’t it? Are you saying that if that pirate, Fincros, magically teleported to Priss from whatever black hole that swallowed him, you’d do absolutely nothing different?”
“Of course it would be different.” She said it calmly, though her heart lurched at the thought.
Paloma leaned forward too far and pitched from the chair.
Rosamma caught her, breaking the fall.
“Jeez, I’m such a fucking klutz,” Paloma muttered, then winced.“Sorry for the language.”
Rosamma just smiled.
Paloma moved her chair aside and stood, facing Rosamma.“I know you’re no longer weak and whatever, but I hate how it turned out for you, Rosamma. That alien.”
“You’ve never met him,” Rosamma pointed out gently.
“True. But I feel like your relationship was never equal. He used you, and he left you. Which, I swear to God, is pure luck, but not if you keep pining after him. It’s been two years, sister. How many more?”
Rosamma tilted her head.
“Suppose Ren disappeared,” she said.“Suppose he promised to come back for you, but two years went by without a word from him. What would you do?”
