Page 74 of A Season in the Snow
‘No, no, I’m not talking about Big Wishes, or Big Life Dreams, I mean actual Christmas wishes, for this Christmas, something you would be very happy to receive, or have happen.’
‘You go first, little brother,’ said Noah. ‘What is your Christmas wish?’
Marco gazed at the water, thinking. Alice watched his eyes scan the lights opposite, his mind dreaming. Eventually he did his funny chuckle. ‘It’s quite hard, huh?’
‘I’ll go,’ said Vanessa, and David stood a little straighter to listen, his own Christmas wish written all over his face. ‘I wish for happy customers on Christmas Day. I want to love this job, but if anyone complains or is upset about something on Christmas Day that would hurt. I want to enjoy the day too.’
The group nodded in unison – the ski instructors in particular were well aware how disheartening it could be when a customer forgets it’s your one Christmas Day of the year too, even if you’re working it.
‘My Christmas wish,’ Noah spoke up, ‘is that my wife just once consumes some Swiss chocolate that isn’t Toblerone.’
Lola laughed. ‘My Christmas wish is for you to shut your damned mouth.’ She shut it for him by planting a big kiss on his lips, in a very Kodak moment in front of the lights of the city. ‘Alice?’ she asked when she broke free.
‘My Christmas wish is for my parents to believe I’m okay,’ Alice said carefully.
‘When you head home you mean?’ Lola asked.
‘Yep. They’ve been worried, for months now, I’d like to make them believe I’m . . . better.’
‘Doyoubelieve it?’
Alice shrugged at Lola. ‘One wish at a time.’
‘I have thought of a Christmas wish,’ Marco announced. ‘I wish for Alice’s parents to be happy for Alice too.’ He took her hand in his, their big coat sleeves causing the action to be out of sight of the others, and squeezed it, whispering. ‘Let’s pool our wishes, huh, double-stuff it so it really comes true.’
‘Okay,’ she whispered back, touched, but they didn’t let go of each other and that became all Alice could think about, even when attention moved to David.
‘My Christmas wish,’ he said, looking a little glum, a little worn, with the warm pink tinge of someone who’s made merry with a little too much mulled wine. He sighed and looked at Vanessa, who pretended not to notice and looked out across the river. David sighed again. ‘Is to burn Marco’s Christmas jumper.’
There were cries ofNo!andNever!and then Lola said, ‘And finally Bear? What’s your Christmas wish this year?’
Bear looked up at her at the sound of his name, and then walked head first into Alice, burying his face in her legs, giving her access to his ears to stroke. Alice laughed and crouched down, wrapping her arms around his stocky body and pushing her face into his softer-than-soft fur. ‘I love you so much, Big Bear!’ she exclaimed, meaning it with all her heart.
Lola grinned and it turned into a large yawn, which was closely followed by Vanessa, and when David slurred something about finding a pub Marco said to the group, ‘I hate to be Mr Party Pooper but David and I have to get up early in the morning to get back over to Mürren. Which means our designated drivers do as well, sorry. Unless you want to stay on and visit with Vanessa, Alice, and the two of us can go in Noah’s car?’
‘I would love that,’ said Vanessa, ‘But I’m working tomorrow as well. I’ll be back over for New Year’s, though.’
They walked back through the darkened streets, each humming variations of the festive music they’d heard throughout the evening. Bear was tired, Alice could tell, so hopefully he’d sleep well tonight and maybe also in the car tomorrow.
She stopped while Bear had a lazy wee, not bothering to lift a leg but instead just squatting like he used to as a smaller puppy.
Lola turned to look for her and then hung back. ‘So was it as good as you hoped?’ she asked, falling into step with Alice.
‘The Singing Tree? Yes, I actually loved it. I’d forgotten my own fondness for quirky traditions and festivities. What did you think?’
‘I think if I could sing like any one of them I’d climb up the nearest tree and belt one out too. When they sang “Halo”, oh my God.’
‘Mmm . . . ’ Alice agreed. She was tired.
‘And the Mariah cover was also great, but more importantly, what’s going on with you and my brother-in-law?’
That woke her up a little bit. ‘Nothing,’ Alice hissed, aware of Marco only a few steps ahead.
‘Yeah, but also something, right?’
Alice touched Lola’s arm to hold her back a little, Bear slowing beside her. ‘I don’t know,’ she confessed. ‘I’m not out here for holiday romance or anything like that. I don’t mean to be leading him on.’
‘Don’t you like him?’
‘Yes, but . . . I can’t be mushy and sweet and going on dates at the moment. I’m not in a good place.’
‘He knows that, you know,’ Lola pointed out.
‘I just don’t know what to feel. And Jill’s not here to help me with the answers. No offence, it’s just that you’re a little biased.’
‘Okay, let me ask you something.’ Lola started walking again but they kept their pace slow. ‘If Jill was here, and you weren’t, and she’d been lonely and sad but had a shot at letting someone in and maybe being happy, what would you tell her?’
Oh, Jill. Alice couldn’t form the words to answer because they clung in her throat, as if they knew they could never be spoken to Jill, not really.
Lola rubbed a hand on her back. ‘It’s okay, you don’t need to say, I think I can guess. But maybe you should treat yourself like you would your best friend. Be nice to Alice, she’s had a tough few months.’
