Page 72 of A Season in the Snow
‘I just don’t want help right now.’ She shook her head. ‘I’m not in denial, I’m just, what’s the word – disconnected?’
‘Like you just want to shut the world out and, what’s a good word . . . wallow?’
‘Exactly. So I went to the extreme and ran away to the mountains!’
‘Hmm.’ Marco turned and gazed out of the window.
‘What are you thinking?’ Alice asked.
‘I was thinking, in my expert medical opinion as a paramedic, that when you were hiding in your flat in London you were running away. I think when you came here that was your first step to coming back home.’
At that point, Bear sat up, yawned, and rested his chin on her shoulder, making Alice laugh. She didn’t know what to think about Marco’s insight at that point, but when he handed her half a squidgy cookie he’d just split, she took it, meeting his eye for a second, and smiled.
‘What about you?’ she asked through a mouthful of chocolate chips. ‘You had a dog growing up. Do you want one now you’re an adult? Take mine if you like, he’s a handful,’ she joked.
‘I’m an adult?! I would love your dog, he’s a real dude. But yeah, any dog would be great. I’d like a St Bernard; you see them around here a lot. We should actually explore the Oberland more. Maybe when you’re back after Christmas, I can take you to visit the museum where the most famous St Bernard in Switzerland lives.’
‘What makes him so famous?’
‘When he was alive he saved the lives of over forty people that he rescued from the mountains. He was called Barry, and he is my hero.’
‘Is that why you joined a mountain rescue crew? To be like Barry?’
‘I’m sure a therapist would say something like that.’
‘So he’s not alive now?’
‘Oh no.’ Marco shook his head. ‘He died in 1814, but his body is preserved.’
‘Okay . . . ’
‘I will take you, we’ll make a date of it.’
‘It sounds very romantic,’ she quipped back, and wondered how they kept straying to the topic of romance today, and she saw Marco smile from the corner of her eye. ‘Maybe we won’t bring Bear, though, he might find it a little confusing that a dog doesn’t want to play with him. So you want your very own Barry one day?’
Marco cracked into another cookie to share. ‘Oh yeah. At least one. I want to train him to do mountain rescues also, and come with me on my treks. I have the best job in the whole world.’
‘What do you love about it?’ She enjoyed hearing him speak passionately about things, be it dogs, the mountains, or even Christmas sweaters. He had that sing-song accent combined with the type of voice you could hear a smile behind. She was so used to her own inner commentary, which had become so monotonous, that he was a gust of mountain-fresh air.
‘Don’t get me wrong, it’s not easy,’ he was saying. ‘It’s hard work and you can be going out in horrible conditions, and the hope that’s pinned on you to save a loved one can be overwhelming. But I feel like if I can be there helping, doing what I can, and I’m lucky enough to have the skills to do so, then why wouldn’t I?’
‘Why wouldn’t you?’ she echoed.
‘You want a coffee?’ Marco asked, reaching for the flask.
‘Actually, can we have a short burst of cold air first? I feel like I want to blow away a couple of cobwebs.’
‘Sure!’
Alice reached for the car stereo and turned the volume up on Sammy Davis Jr’s ‘Jingle Bells’, and pressed the button for all four car windows to lower. They were driving alongside a lake and traffic was quiet, so she slowed the car down and breathed in the frosty breeze.
‘Wow, it’s fresh out there, huh?’ Marco called over the noise of the wind.
Bear was in heaven. He whole big face was framed in the open window, his nose visible in Alice’s rear-view mirror. His eyes were closed against the sun and the cold air spread its fingers through the streamers of his ears. His nostrils pulsed, and every few seconds he’d have to bring his big tongue into his mouth to moisten it again.
‘He is happy, isn’t he?’ she said to Marco, who reached back and stroked Bear’s side as he leaned in pleasure towards the side door.
‘He’s living his best life,’ Marco agreed. ‘And are you happy? Or at least, as happy as you can be?’
Alice smiled at him, then leaned her head towards the window, took a final gulp of air, and then closed them, making sure Bear’s snout was back inside. She kept her eyes on the road but in her mind all she could see was Marco’s face. ‘Yes.’ She breathed in. ‘Okay, let’s have that coffee.’
