Page 69 of The Location Shoot
“Brian, that’s not what I want. None of it is,” she said forcefully.
“Doll . . .”
“I’m speaking. Please let me finish. I realize you’ve looked out for me for a long time, so it’s been difficult for me to say this, but you work for me. I don’t work for you. We have completely different visions for my career. No more men’s magazines and stripper roles. I want to make notable films. I was even thinking about doing live theater; it would be such a great learning experience. Not all actors can sing and dance like I can. I want to take acting classes to work on my craft, to get better.”
“There’s no reason to waste your time . . .”
“You’re not listening to me.”
“Willow, doll, if the classes are important to you . . .” he started.
“Brian, this isn’t working anymore. I’m going to be looking for a new management team, effective immediately. I want to work with people who take me seriously.”
“Doll . . .”
“There’s nothing left to say. Cancel anything you’ve booked for me, and make it clear that you never had my approval.”
He snorted. “Just because you landed one Jean Mercier film doesn’t mean you can suddenly parlay that into a career as a serious actress. You’re no Charlotte Reed. Staying on brand is in your best interest.”
“Willow Barnes isn’t a brand, she’s a person, she’s me. I’m not a child anymore. From now on, I’ll decide what’s in my best interest.” She paused and added, “You’re right,I’m not Charlotte Reed, but I held my own with her and I hope to be just as good as she is someday. I’ve made mistakes, but I’ve learned from them. Maybe you’re right and I’ll never land the kind of roles I dream about, but I owe it to the little girl I was who dreamt of being a real performer to at least try.”
“Listen . . .”
“Someone who doesn’t see me as a serious actress is never going to be able to help make my dream a reality, so there’s nothing left to say.” She rolled down her window, breathing in the warm LA air, which suddenly felt anew with possibility.
“BABE, YOU’RE BACK!” SAVANNAHexclaimed as she jumped into Finn’s arms.
“What are you doing here?” he asked.
“I relieved your house sitter a couple of hours ago. Come into the kitchen. I ordered Chinese food for a late-night dinner.”
“Savannah, we need to talk.”
“Finn, just come have something to eat and then . . .”
“What I have to say can’t wait.”
She rubbed his biceps and said, “It’s okay. Your dalliance with the makeup girl or whoever went a little further than we agreed to. I get it. I forgive you, babe. Now come and . . .”
“No, we need to talk. Now.”
THE NEXT DAY AT NOON, ELLA FINALLYcrawled out of bed, her eyes swollen and bloodshot. She grabbed her phone and listened to her voicemail. There was a message from Jean.
“Ma chérie, I’m calling to check on you. My guess is you cried yourself to sleep last night. You have a choice,Ella. You can try to go about your life as if nothing ever happened, or you can figure out why you pushed him away. Take it from someone who has fucked up every relationship I’ve been in: I’ve never loved anyone the way you and Finn love each other. It’s not too late. You’ll never have the happiness you deserve unless you’re brave. Be brave,ma chérie, in your life as you are in your work. Ask yourself the big questions. He’s worth it. So are you.”
After deleting the message, she opened a text from Willow to see the photograph they had all taken together. When she saw herself sitting joyfully with Finn, his arm around her, she began to weep. “I do love him,” she mumbled. “Be brave. Ask the big questions. Like why the fuck did I do that? Why was I so scared? Am I so afraid of being abandoned or hurt that I can’t trust love will last?” She grabbed her laptop and plopped into bed, her teddy bear beside her. She took a deep breath, opened her browser, and ran a search for local therapists.
CHAPTER 18
“The sun always shines brightly for the Cannes Film Festival,” Jean said as they arrived at the Palais des Festivals et des Congrès. “Not a cloud in sight. It’s another picture-perfect day in the French Riviera.”
Ella smoothed the sides of her strapless black satin mermaid-style gown and touched the green amber hanging from her neck, on full display with her hair pulled back into a loose French braid. “You are stunning,ma chérie,” he said, taking her hand. “Shall we?” he asked as they entered the iconic scene: the famous red carpet sprawling before them, hordes of entertainment reporters hollering and cameras flashing on both sides of the carpet, and fans eagerly trying to catch a glimpse of their favorite Hollywood stars. They met up with Michael and his date.
“Jean, Ella, great to see you both,” he said. “This is Lauren.”
“Pleased to meet you,” Ella said, noticing the brown amber earrings dangling from her ears and matching bracelet around her wrist.
“Nice to meet you too,” Lauren replied. “Michael has told me so much about you both and what a wonderful time he had making this film.”
