Page 14 of Restitution
“Killing yourself isn’t going to make it all go away. If you jump, then it might be done for you, but everyone who cares for you will suffer. Do you know why? Because you are loved, Stacey.”
I want to shake my head. No one loves me. I’m dead to everyone.
“Stacey…” He inches forward, and my jaw trembles. “We can fix this. We can talk to him. I’m sorry I got scared. We can fix it. We can find out what happened last night.”
The wind is heavier, and I should be cold in just my T-shirt, but I don’t feel anything. I don’t feel anything at all. I don’t want to jump because Kade left me. I want to do it because I want to die.
“Look at me,” he says, his voice closer. “Please, Stacey. I lost everything too.”
I turn my head to him slowly.
His face is a mess. His nose is bleeding, his eyebrow cut, and his bottom lip is swollen. “I lost my fiancée, who’s probably already pregnant. I lost my brother. And I’ve most likely lost the rest of my family. If you jump, then you’re leaving me to do this on my own.”
My voice betrays me as it croaks, my face cramping, “But it hurts.”Inside and outside. I have plasters all over my chest and thighs. The bruising is only getting worse, and inside me is ripped to shreds.
He raises his hands as he inches forward, until he’s right beside me, on the opposite side of the railing.
He’s got a grip on my top from behind.
“I lost my baby girl, and now I’ve lost him.”
Carefully, Jason moves closer. “I’m sorry this has happened to you. But death is not the answer, Stacey. You’ll leave so much heartbreak behind, when we can all help you. You jumping off this bridge will not make it stop.”
“Maybe not,” I say, looking out into the mist again, my voice monotone. “But it’s the only way I think I can stop it from hurting so much.”
Jason sighs. “What’s your favourite movie?”
I stay quiet, confused by his question.
“Mine isFight Club. I think I’ve watched it over a thousand times. What’s yours?”
I wet my lips, and as I go to reply, images of me and Kade lying in bed, watchingThe Greatest Showmanflash before me, Milo and Hopper jumping around with me as I dance, and my gut drops.
Jason keeps going. “Tell me about your family. What do they do?”
I frown, but instead of staring into the abyss and letting go of the railing, I say, “My dad is an engineer. Nora, my stepmother, stopped working when she married him.” I blink, unsure why I’m even responding to him. “She has two sons. One is fine, but the other is the reincarnation of Satan.”
“My dad is an engineer too.”
I turn to face him. “What kind?”
“Structural. He built his business over the years. What kind of engineer is your dad?”
I remember the day he got his big break and was picked up by awell-known company. “Chemical.”
He hums, and his grip tightens on my top as I lessen my hold on the railing. “The good brother, what’s he like?”
“Bossy,” I say, my lip quirking at the corner. “He’s the way all brothers should be. He loves me like I’m his real sister. He… he didn’t want to go to college, because that would leave me with Chris. He knows Chris is possessive of me and controlling, but he doesn’t know just how far he takes things. He deserves to go over this bridge.”
He nods. “Then let’s throw him over instead.”
I turn my face to him again, tears running down my cheeks then blowing away with the wind. “Promise?”
“Come down, and I promise.”
Little did I know, when he helped me off the bridge and drove me home, that would be the last time I’d see him.
He broke his promise and, along with Kade, vanished from my life in the process.
