Page 70 of Salvation
My fingers tighten on my helmet, but the smile stays on my mouth. “No, sir. Can’t think of anything.”
“Well, I guess you owe me some bear crawls since you’re so intent on goofing off.”
I groan, knowing it’s no use in arguing, but also not sure if I have the strength to drag my body down this field again—not when all I want to do is go home and lie in bed for weeks.
“Coach,” I attempt, but he gives me a hard stare. I shut my mouth.
With a heavy sigh, I shove my helmet back on my head and start crawling. I crawl until I puke, and even then, I remain numb.
Chapter 31
Campbell
It’s been four weeks since I’ve stepped into the station, but it’s time for me to return. My leave is ending. I thought I would dread it because I was not in a good place when I left, but things have changed. Ihavechanged. So, as I walk through the door, a spring that wasn’t there before lightens my step.
It lasts until I reach my desk, where Cap is waiting for me, his arms crossed over his chest and his lips pressed together in a tight line.
“Sir,” I say, dipping my head.
He’s leaned against my desk, taking up the whole space, and I stop short. A wad of tobacco is tucked into his bottom lip, and he uses his tongue to move it from one side to the other while he studies me. Other than that, the hard lines of his face don’t move.
“If you’re comfortable, I can take the office over there,” I say, hitching my thumb to the door with his name on it.
His eyes narrow, and for a second, I worry that he will tell me that I’m fired, despite what he said before my leave, but when the corner of his mouth starts to twitch, finally breaking out into a full grin, my shoulders sag.
“It’s good to have you back, Richards.”
I smile, and it’s different than before, too. It no longer feels as forced. “It’s good to be back.” I expect him to shove off my deskand get to work, but he lingers. After an awkward pause in which I wait for him to move and he settles in further on my desk, I ask, “Is there something else, Cap?”
“Yeah,” he says, scratching at his jaw. “Yeah, there is. Look, I’m not asking you to tell me what happened before you left. A man is entitled to his private life—even if the citizens of this town sometimes think they aren’t—but I do need to make sure you’re good. That you have your head on.”
The back of my neck itches with embarrassment, but I meet his gaze, giving him the respect he deserves. “Yeah, Cap. I’m good.”
He stands to his full height and claps me on the shoulder.
“I’m glad to hear it, but if that ever changes—” His voice trails off, but I know what he’s asking.
“Thank you. It means a lot.” Sometimes, when you’re in the depths of depression, it’s easy to think you’re alone, but I have people. I just have to remember that.
“Anytime, kid. Anytime.” Slapping my shoulder one more time for good measure, he walks away, leaving me standing alone.
I step forward, unbuckling my sidearm and laying it on my desk as I sit down. Steepling my fingers beneath my chin, I stare at it, thinking about the darkness I sat in two months ago. It would have been so easy to pull the gun out and end it all—and there were several times I was close to it—but I’m glad I didn’t because the darkness is more gray than black now. It’s not gone completely, but it is much better than it was. It’s easier to recognize that I would have just been transferring the pain had I gone through with it.
A throat clears beside me, startling me from my thoughts, and I look up to find Hayes hovering over where I sit..
“If you didn’t bring food, then I’m busy,” I joke, but Hayes doesn’t smile. He’s staring at my gun with a look of concern creasing his brows. “Is something wrong?”
His eyes flick to mine, and his frown grows deeper. “Are you sure you’re ready to come back?”
I don’t blame him for asking the question. The last couple of times he’s seen me, I haven’t been in a good place, but it still stings. Looking around, I check to ensure we’re alone before facing him head-on again.
“I’m ready, Hayes. I promise. I wouldn’t be here if I weren’t. I—uh—I went to the doctor.”
Hayes’s eyes widen in surprise. “You did? Did you go alone? I would’ve gone with you.”
I shake my head, cutting him off. “Ivy went with me.”
“Oh.” I can tell he’s trying not to ask, but he’s been hanging around Silas too much because not knowing is killing him. I smile, reveling in how much he’s changed in the last year. MJ coming back was the best thing that could have ever happened to him. There was always a piece of him missing without her.
