Page 8 of Rekindling Little River
Mandi led the way to a table surrounded by chairs and gestured for them to sit. She took a deep breath and offered a sympathetic smile to River.
“You can’t lose your Little. They’re a part of you. They won’t just disappear and never return. But I’ve learned an important lesson. My Little side is not just shy, she’s also cautious and when things get rough, she gets scared. I thought I’d lost my Little for good at the end of a tough breakup, but she wasn’t gone. She just didn’t feel safe surfacing. Not until I met my Mommy. With time and patience, my Mommy was able to reassure the most vulnerable part of me that she was safe and loved.”
What Mandi said resonated with River. It made sense. Unfortunately, River wasn’t certain having an idea of the root cause was going to help their situation. If they needed to feel safe and loved to let their Little free, they might as well have lost them forever. They did their best not to let their disappointment show while nodding their understanding. They weren’t certain it worked but if their new friends noticed, they let it slide and allowed River to change the subject.
They sat in the library for a while, chatting, getting to know one another, and making plans to meet when both Mandi and Tay were off. Maybe having new friends to play with would help.
Dave
He didn’t know if it would seem stalkerish and frankly, at that point, he didn’t care. Dave sat in front of River’s room, awaiting their arrival. He was done leaving things to chance. River thought no one would want them. Dave couldn’t allow that misconception to continue. He’d pined after them from the moment they’d met. He’d been newly separated and brokenhearted and still he’d lusted after them. He’d become more infatuated with every encounter, drawn to their strength, loyalty, and kindness.
He sat with his back to their door, book in hand, content to read and wait. If things went according to plan, then Dave would have the opportunity to prove to River that he could be what they needed. Then, he’d just have to make sure he didn’t fuck it up.
He’d gotten about a quarter of the way through the book he was reading when a shadow fell over him and River’s puzzled voice greeted him. “Dave?”
He scrambled to his feet, placing the bookmark in his story and offering a sheepish smile to River as he explained, “I was hoping maybe we could talk.”
“So, you’re lounging at my door?”
“Well, I didn’t want to miss you.”
The look River gave him clearly said they didn’t know what to think of his antics, but they nodded their head anyway and stepped around him to open their door. As they gestured for Dave to enter, he fought the urge to wipe his sweaty palms on his jeans. This was it. His shot. He couldn’t mess it up.
River led the way to the sitting area and after taking one of the seats for themselves and indicating the other, asked, “What would you like to talk about?”
Maybe his time would have been better spent practicing what he wanted to say as he waited instead of reading. Now that he was here, his words seemed to want to jumble in his head. He took a deep breath, however, and tried to calm his nerves. Finally, he decided the best approach was a straightforward one.
“I was wondering if you’d let me be your Daddy.”
CHAPTER 7
River
River knew their mouth was hanging open wide enough to catch flies, but they couldn’t seem to get their muscles to work enough to close it. Honestly, they were kind of surprised their jaw hadn’t completely unhinged and landed on the floor. They guessed they’d been silent too long, as Dave spoke again.
“I guess it’s only fair that I warn you being my Little one won’t be easy. My need to care for someone runs deep and extends to all areas. I need complete control. I’ve been told I’m too much. My ex-wife said I was a psycho, controlling bastard. So, there’s that. I would never force you into anything, but I would protect you and care for you in every way.”
River still couldn’t form words, despite the flair of anger at Dave’s ex. How had she not been able to see the treasure she had? River hadn’t known Dave long, less than a year, and even though his stepping in and bossing them around had gotten on their nerves, they could clearly see it came from a place of concern. There had never been a malicious intent behind anything Dave had said or done. River should know.
“I know this probably seems to come from nowhere, but it doesn’t. I’ve had to curb my baser Daddy instincts with you from the day we met. I admit I haven’t always been successful at it but, in my defense, I’ve never been so instantly drawn to someone before.”
Wait, what? River wanted to ask what he meant, but theystillcouldn’t get their vocal cords to respond to their brain’s command to speak. Beyond the fact that this was a shock to their system, theyknewit was a bad idea. There was no way they’d be able to keep their new-found attraction under wraps if they submitted to this man.
As if he was reading their mind he added, “It can be platonic if you want. At least, for now. I’d like to eventually take that step, but I understand that takes trust. I just want a chance to prove to you that youcantrust me.”
“Umm.” Well, they weren’t winning any articulation awards any time soon, but getting any sort of sound out was progress at this point.
“Yeah, I know I’m too old for you. I’ve told myself a million times or more that I shouldn’t do this, but if you’re willing to give me a chance, I’m done denying my attraction.”
Too old? Yeah, they were younger than him, and he had a bit of gray sprinkled throughout his brown hair, but they’d never seen him asold. They weren’t sure exactly how old he was but if they had to guess there was only about a decade between their ages. That wasn’t really all that much.
“Well.” Finally! They’d managed to speak an actual word! Before they could figure out if another word would form, Dave was speaking again and this time, what he said knocked the air right out of their lungs, the thoughts from their brain, and obliterated their hope of ever speaking again.
“I’ve wanted a lot of things in my life, River. But the last eleven months have taught me that I didn’t really understandwanting before, because I have never wanted, or needed, anything as much as you.”
Dave
Shit.
