Page 41 of When Ben Loved Jace
My back is to the café interior. I start to turn, wanting to see what has her so spooked. She practically dives across the table to take my hands in hers. “So whenisthe wedding?”
I laugh. “Remember when we used to talk about getting married on the same day?”
“At the same ceremony,” she says, sounding a little breathless. “And that if we failed to find anyone, we would marry each other.”
“For tax reasons,” I remind her when my hands are squeezed painfully tight.
In the reflection of the window behind her, I notice someone approach our table. And it’s the strangest thing because, despite the reflection being little more than a wavering image, there’s something unsettling familiar about the outline.
“Allison! Hey!”
The voice is male and husky. Long dormant neurons fire in my brain, and for whatever reason, I can’t seem to breathe.
“Benjamin?”
I turn my head in disbelief and see bronze skin and a mane of dark hair.
“Holy shit!” A stunning smile robs me of my strength. “It’s really you!”
I open my mouth to respond, but all that comes out is a squeak, because Tim’s eyes are different. They’re still the same striking silver but are now filled with transparent emotion. I only saw them like that once, just before I slipped out of his bedroom for the final time. I expect them to become guarded and impenetrable again when they shift to consider Allison briefly, but they don’t. Tim’s gaze returns to mine with the same promise of love. When he places a strong hand on my shoulder, I feel something begin to stir inside of me and can’t take it anymore. I launch to my feet, stumble away from the table, and sprint for the door, needing to escape.
I make it outside and hightail it down the sidewalk withouta destination in mind. All I know is that I can’t do this. For so many reasons. My heart is pounding out of control, my palm placed over it protectively.
“Benjamin!”
That voice. Ugh. That name!
I hear the rhythmic thumping of feet behind me and am no longer an adult on the verge of graduating from college. I’m a lonely teenager, desperate for someone to love. Gone is the daylight, replaced by the cold glow of the moon as bugs sing around me, sharing the same need, and it all comes back. Everything I felt, everything we had, everything we lost. The sound of my name being called rips me back to the present. When I turn around, the sun is blinding as Tim jogs toward me, so I shield my eyes, needing to see him. And he’s beautiful. More so than ever. His black hair is almost shoulder-length, wild and untamed. Those silver eyes hold me in place just like they used to, his powerful body coming closer by the second. I could never outrun him. Doesn’t matter that I got a head start of a few years. He would’ve caught up to me eventually. I give up trying to escape, and like the teenager I once was, I stop to stare.
Tim is wearing a sleeveless shirt, revealing brown skin and biceps that are bigger than I remember. I try my best to ignore the cargo shorts, knowing all too well what they contain, but there’s literally nowhere safe for my gaze to land. His proud chest reminds me of the way his pecs used to swell before he came. The beefy shoulders make me think of how I would sometimes rest my head there while murmuring comforting words.We’re going to be all right. I promise.And that handsome face, which always won me over, despite any misgivings I had. His features are even more masculine now. He was a good looking boy. As a man, Tim is absolutely breathtaking. Even with his brow crinkling in concern.
“Please!” he pants. “Just hear me out. You have no idea how often I’ve dreamt of this moment.”
“Then where were you?” I snap, my voice cracking with vulnerability, because if Tim really wanted this, he could have sought me out. All those years of stupid failed relationships… Where was he then?
“It’s a long story,” he says. “Can we go somewhere and talk?”
The offer is incredibly tempting until I think of a man with the sweetest heart and an ornery little cat. “Sorry, but no.”
Tim’s face falls. “Let me call you then.”
“I’m not giving you my number!”
“Uhh…” He pats his pockets, looking desperate as he pulls out his phone. “Here. Take mine.”
I recoil at the suggestion. “What?”
“I’ll call you later tonight.”
He grabs my wrist, so he can press the phone into my palm. Where our skin touches, an electric current courses through me, like all the potential we had is still there. Or maybe it’s even stronger than before, because his eyes continue to brim with emotion.
“I’m sorry, Benjamin. You were right.”
“About what?”
“Everything. I should have listened to you. So please, just this once, listen to me. I’ll call you tonight. Okay?”
My resolve crumbles. I nod.
