Page 44 of When Ben Loved Jace
“Happy, I guess,” I answer at last.
“You guess?” he says, picking up on my uncertainty. “I think I get it.”
“You do?”
“Yeah. I was happy yesterday. And the day before that. I’m happy now too, but I’m no longer—I don’t know… Satisfied.”
I swallow against the lump in my throat, because yeah, he gets it.
“I need to see you again, Benjamin.”
My early warning systems kick in. I slide out of bed, so I can pace off my anxiety. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“How come? I’d let you get dressed first. Although you look good wearing nothing but a pair of boxers.”
My mouth falls open. Then I spin to face the window.
“You’re still so damn scrawny,” Tim says with a chuckle. “And I like it.”
Did I just hear an echo?
“Where are you?” I ask before lowering the phone.
“Take a guess.” I hear him respond.
The lights in my room are already low, but I turn them off completely, so I can see outside my window. Tim appears from the shadows with a sly grin on his face and a phone pressed against his ear. The one he must have used to track the location of his own. “Don’t look so surprised. I learned from the best gay stalker there is.”
“Oh my god!” I say, scurrying for my clothes.
I hastily put them on while listening to him laugh.
“Raise the screen and let me in,” he suggests.
“No!” I spin around, my face burning. “Go to the front door.”
Tim shrugs. “Works for me.”
I gather up my things and creep through the apartment, not wanting to alert Allison. I can hear her singing in her bedroom. I notice a half-empty bottle of vodka on the kitchen table as I sneak past it. She’s still drinking a lot, despite not being with party-boy Ken anymore. Then again, with graduation fast approaching, I can’t begrudge her a vice. We all have our secret addictions.
Tim is already there when I open the front door. He’swearing a tight-fitting T-shirt that grips his impressive build and a different pair of cargo shorts than I saw earlier. His hair is neater now—dark and silky and begging to be touched. I always wanted him to grow it out. Now I got my wish. Lucky me. He really shouldn’t be here.
Tim takes a step inside. I put a palm against his chest to stop him, which is a bad idea, because it reminds me how obsessed with his pecs I used to be. And it doesn’t work anyway. He just keeps coming closer, my arm sagging like a limp noodle to let him.
“I missed you,” he says, a hint of beer on his breath that mingles with his cologne. “Did you miss me?”
“Stop!” I hiss in hushed tones. “You can’t come in.”
His eyes travel deeper into the apartment before he smirks. “Are you worried we’ll wake up your parents?”
“Allison iswayscarier than they ever were!”
This seems to sober him up. He has no real reason to fear her, but it could cause a scene, and that would interfere with… well, whatever this is.
“Go for a walk with me,” he suggests.
“Fine.”
I push on him again, and this time Tim doesn’t resist.
