Page 22 of Switch!
“I lost control.”
“Does that happen often?” She’s trying to hide it, but I can tell part of her is scared of me.
“It’s a recent thing,” I say, since it’s the truth. Caleb turning on his friends to protect me is definitely new, but I don’t want to make him out to be a hero. “I shouldn’t pick on anyone to begin with. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
“The fresh start will be good for you,” Ashley says, sounding certain. “Promise me you won’t hurt Travis again.”
“Why?”
“Because he was nice to me.”
My mouth falls open. It’s the same reason I started liking her, but I never felt I went out of my way to be kind in return.
“Don’t get jealous,” Ashley says, misinterpreting my shock. “It’s nothing like that.”
“What is it then? How was he nice?”
“He was worried that I might get hurt. I think he wanted to protect me.”
“From what?” I ask, wanting to know if she’ll betray my secret. “From me?”
“Just leave him alone,” Ashley says. “There’s nothing sexy about being a bully.”
I can’t let it drop. Not yet. “Then how come he’s not sitting here with you instead of me?”
She searches my eyes. “I don’t know. There isn’t a spark. I wouldn’t mind if there was.”
“Even though he looks the way he does?” The words sound accusatory.
Her delicate brow furrows in response. Then she shakes her head and stares off into the distance. “Women aren’t like men.”
“What do you mean?”
“We focus on more than appearance. You’ve never seen a gorgeous woman married to a man who is—”
“Ugly? Yeah. I always assume he’s rich.”
“It’s not as simple as that. And even if it is, how is being attracted to someone’s success any worse than wanting them for their appearance alone?”
“I don’t know. But it’s frustrating for guys like me.”
Now she seems confused. “Do you have self-esteem issues?”
“Yes,” I say, because it’s true for me and an embarrassing thing to make Caleb admit.
“Then you shouldn’t focus so much on the physical. I get tired of people liking me because I’m pretty. If I met a guy who was interested in what I had to say, and even rarer, had thoughts of his own to share, then it wouldn’t matter so much what he looks like.”
“Then I ask you again, how come Travis isn’t sitting here instead of me?”
“He’s no different. What does Travis actually know about me? For that matter, what do you? That you couldn’t even remember what my goals are after high school speaks volumes. If that didn’t register, why were you so eager to go on this date?”
“So it is a date?” I ask, trying a smile.
Ashely shakes her head. “I’m not sure.” She surprises me by hopping off the tailgate. “The only thing I’m certain of is that I want to cool my feet in that water.” She kicks off her shoes and starts working on her socks. “Are you going to join me? Or are you just going to sit there?”
I grin and tear at my shoelaces. Soon we’re both standing in shallow water warmed by the sun. Ashley splashes me playfully, and I splash her back. When she retaliates, she sends more water my way than intended, judging from the wide eyes and covered mouth.
“I amsosorry!” she says.
