Page 26 of Switch!
She takes another drag, and when exhaling again, it’s like she’s trying to blow away my concerns. “Now you’re just being silly. Raymond isn’t interested in men.”
“How do you know?”
My mother tilts her head. “Do you really need me to spell it out? I know this is difficult for you, honey, but you can’t keep sabotaging my relationships.”
My mouth falls open in shock. “What?”
“Whenever I get close to a man, you always—”
Throw a tantrum, misbehave, and make myself a royal pain to scare him off. I’m not proud of it, but it’s true. And besides… “That’s when I was younger!”
“I know having him live here is a big adjustment, but try to focus on the positive. Paying the bills won’t be as difficult. And I like knowing that you aren’t here by yourself all day.”
“Yeah, because now I’ve got a pedophile as my babysitter. That’s a real big improvement!”
She stares at me long and hard. Then she shakes her head as if disappointed. “Can you please take my happiness into consideration? Just this once. You aren’t a child anymore. Before long you’ll be off to college, and I’ll be alone. I’m not getting any younger, Travis. I know you want your father to come back—”
“This isn’t about him!”
“Then what do you want me to do? Break up with the first decent guy I’ve met in ages just because you’ve convinced yourself that he wants to molest you?”
“Of course not,” I say. “That would be crazy. Next time I’ll let him do whatever he wants. That way there isn’t any room for doubt.”
I turn, grab my shoes from beside the front door, and leave without putting them on. I wait until I’m around the building and out of sight. I don’t want her to find me. Not yet. I want her to worry so she’ll understand how upset I am, and how wrong she is about Raymond. Although my motherisright about one thing: Before long, I won’t be living here anymore. I don’t mean college. That’s too far away. I’ll be gone much sooner than that.
Caleb is moving to Tacoma tomorrow. And so am I.
Nine ↔ Chapter
I’m running out of safe places. At one time I would have gone to the library. Until this morning, my home was my sanctuary. Maybe if I had friends, or a job, or if school was still in session, I’d have more options. Instead I walk the streets, anger propelling me for the first hour. Despair takes over after that. I think of Ashley and wonder if she’d be willing to take me in. That doesn’t seem likely. How sad that the only person I feel like I can turn to is Caleb. Not because I expect him to be sympathetic or to care, but because his body is the last of my safe places. I’m tempted to go straight over to his house, bang on the door, and possess him the moment our eyes meet. What then? Caleb is moving tomorrow. I don’t intend to stick around either.
There isn’t enough time to come up with an elaborate plan. All I know is that I’m hitching a ride. I figure Caleb will need to drive his truck to Tacoma. His parents have their own car, plus the moving van, if they decide to rent one instead of hiring a team. Caleb will likely be alone in his truck for the entire trip, meaning nobody will notice my unconscious body in the backseat. I’ll bail somewhere along the way and start a new life. My powers can help with that. But first I need to get the hell out of here.
I don’t return home until late. My stomach is grumbling and I’m parched—both reminders that surviving on my own won’t be easy. My plan is terrible. There are too many unknown elements, but I keep thinking of Raymond and the glimpse I got of a naked body that I never wanted to see. How his fingers kept reaching around the cotton towel to touch me. What did he think would happen? Whatwillhappen if I stay behind? I don’t intend to find out.
“Where have you been?” my mother asks, meeting me at the door. She’s clutching the front of her dressing gown, the lines on her face deeper than usual.
“Out walking,” I say, pushing past her to the kitchen.
“Are you hungry?” She doesn’t wait for an answer.
I watch as she heats up leftovers and it makes me want to cry. “We need to talk,” she says when handing me a plate.
“Is Raymond here?” I ask.
She glances at the door to her bedroom. “He’s sleeping.”
If she believed me, he wouldn’t be allowed to stay the night. “I just want to eat and go to bed.”
“Tomorrow then?” she asks. “I have an early shift, but when I’m off work, we can go out for ice cream.”
Because that will make everything better. Jesus fucking Christ. I nod my agreement anyway. My mother hugs me and says that she loves me. Despite everything, I love her too. That’s why I turn away before she can see the tears in my eyes. When I’m in my room, I scarf down the food while packing, filling a backpack with what I expect to need. Including the notebook, even though I’m tempted to leave it behind so my mother will have some sort of explanation. I don’t, of course. Anyone reading the contents would dismiss my experiences as the deprived fantasies of a depressed teenager. Raymond would probably use the notebook as evidence that I’m delusional and can’t be trusted.
I set my alarm for four in the morning, tossing and turning until it goes off. I get dressed, put on my shoes, and grab my backpack. Then I walk to Caleb’s house, worried I won’t catch him before he leaves. I assume the McCains will want to get an early start with such a long trip ahead of them.
When I reach his house, I watch from across the street. Only one window is lit at first, but more join it soon after. I start to shiver as I stand there waiting. I swear I can feel dew forming on the tip of my nose by the time the garage door finally opens. I take a step forward. Then I stop. Caleb is putting luggage in his truck, but he isn’t alone. I see his mother and a stocky man with a buzzed head. Caleb’s father. The family resemblance is unmistakable. He’s talking to his son while gesturing at the street. They’re getting ready to leave. I begin to panic when Caleb climbs in his truck. I was hoping to catch him alone, like before, so I could possess him and put my body in the backseat. No chance of that now.
His father is walking alongside the truck as it backs into the driveway. Then he raises his hand. The brake lights illuminate just before the engine shuts off and Caleb gets out. The same happens with the SUV, this time driven by Mrs. McCain. Once both vehicles are in the driveway, Mr. McCain returns inside to close the garage. He reappears out the front of the house soon after, locking the door behind him. They won’t be returning here, it would seem.
