Page 93 of Ghost of a Chance
Turning away from her he put his head against the wall behind him.“You think that’s why we got together?The ghost?”
The words were muffled but she heard them clearly.
“No.I mean not for me, but maybe for you.I’m different and probably seem exciting to you.”
“For the love of— You are the most frustrating woman I’ve ever met,” he said, and pivoted to face her.“I like that you are unique and that you don’t play nice.I like you for you.”
All of the fear and uncertainty she’d felt about finally telling him dissipated.“I like you too.”
“But it scares me that you’ll use that excuse to keep me at arm’s length now.I see you, Kirsty.I see the woman you want to be with your temporary tattoos, walking into bookstores, talking to strangers and unraveling puzzles like your fictional character does.And that frightens you.”
“Seeing me is the last thing I want you to do.”It wasn’t lost on her that the conversation had turned entirely personal and not about the ghost at all.Maybe it had never been about that.
“Why the hell not?You don’t want to be invisible, Kirsty.”
It had taken her a long time to feel comfortable in her skin.Telling him that there were things about herself she didn’t like…wasn’t what she wanted to do.But she’d demanded honesty from him and he’d delivered it in spades.
“There are things I don’t like about myself.You’re not wrong when you said I was looking for you to screw up.Waiting and watching so I could be right to not let myself feel safe in your arms.To not let myself admit how much you mean to me.There, happy?”
“I mean thanks for the truth, but honestly do you think so little of me that you think a few flaws would make me not like you?”
“It’s not a few flaws.I am really judgy and I hold on to my anger.I’m not going to pretend I can just let things go.I’m mad you didn’t tell me about the short story and how you were working with Paul even knowing I hadn’t told you I have no psychic ability.”
As soon as the words left her mouth the overhead lights flickered and then a bulb exploded at the other end of the table.
“The ghost disagrees,” Jasper said.
He came around the table and pulled her into his arms.“You can’t scare me off.”
Twenty-Two
Sleep eluded her, so she spent the night writing and then reapplying the temporary tattoo that had almost worn off.Staring at her chest and arms in the bathroom mirror, covered in art that mattered to her, made it a lot easier for her to see.Thiswasher true self.But at home she tried to ignore it.Tried to hide that she was K.L.Henson.
She might not care what other people thought but there was that part of her that was always trying to blend in.Pretending to be something she wasn’t.Her time in Burlington had shown her that wasn’t necessary.Here she was just herself.
How had she never noticed that she wasn’t comfortable in her own skin in the small Southern town she and her mom had settled in.She’d stayed there because she had desperately wanted a place to call home.
But it wasn’t the right place.She shouldn’t be living where she couldn’t always be herself.
Judge Judy shouted “Baloney!”at 6:00 a.m.The usual song and dance of Jasper shuffling downstairs with Chewie made her smile.
She’d missed him last night.The bed felt too big without him next to her.Something that had never bothered her before she’d let him sleep with her.Sourly she pounded out a really intense scene in her book where Eva confronted her longtime friend for betraying her.
Kirsty hadn’t planned on Crispin doing that, but as the words poured out of her, it was definitely where the story needed to go.Eva had her own secrets, but it felt cathartic to let her rip into Crispin.The way that Kirsty had wanted to let Jasper have it last night.But in real life that kind of argument left too much emotional debris.
Holding her tongue wasn’t something she usually did, but she went easy on him because she had her own secrets.
But.No use rehashing that.Today was a new day.She was happy with her pages, and when she looked at the clock it was already after nine.
Gia texted to remind her that she had a book signing and talk at two that afternoon.Then we have an appointment in town at the space that used to be Peterson’s Used Books.The former owner was going to meet them afterward to check out the physics textbook and try to identify it.
Staying in her room was beginning to feel cowardly, so she got her bag with her book signing stuff before going into the kitchen.She heard voices in the living room and wanted to avoid any awkward confrontation.
Jasper stood at the back door, head down, talking to Chewie.
“Out or in, I’m not standing here all day,” he said to the dog.
But Kirsty knew he didn’t mean it.He’d do whatever the dog needed him to.Maybe that was what was bothering her so much about him.
