Page 21 of Marrying the Gardener
Just a real solid masculine specimen, him.
But…also…it’s likeyup, that right there is a person. A whole entire person.
Whoop-dee-doo.
When I don’t answer, he covers his mouth, horrified. “You’re…not attracted to men.”
“Defineattraction,” I say.
Baffle lights in the mysterious pools of colors that make up his eyes. “When you see someone and think, Wow, I’d tap that.”
“That sounds juvenile as all—” I cuss, deadpan.
“Have you…never thought that?”
“Not even a single time, actually. The person I’m most in love with in this world is my best friend, Crisis.” I can’t stop myself from smiling. “She’s this big ball of adorable chaos, and I would do anything for her. Notably, I have never once been interested intappingthat, though. Since I’m sure you’ve at least seen her once and—given yourcharmingdisposition—have noticed, she’s got a very nice backside, worthy only of the most illustrious taps.”
“I have met Crisis,” he says. “I have not once been interested in tapping her.” His gaze lowers, across my body. “I’m more into…” He drags his attention away, sinking in the bed beside me as he frees a very tight breath. “Yeah, so. Anyway. You’re asexual.”
“Back up. You’re hypersexual, and you’ve never once looked at Crisis and said,Wow, those are some childbearing hips if ever I’ve seen good childbearing hips. I’d love to put a child onthose hips?”
“No, can’t say that,” he clears his throat, coughs, “I have. Have…you?”
“If I sayyes, are you going to think I’m lesbian? Because, genuinely, it’s a friend thing. I want to squish Crisis’s cute little cheeks and hold her hand and fall asleep with her because she’s…” I bite my tongue, review what I’m going on about, how deeply personal it is, and decide it doesn’t really matter if Kaleb knows. “She’s the only person I feel safe with.” Linking my hands together, I pick at my nails and look up at the ceiling past the tall posts of my bed. “Our souls are twins. She gets me in ways I don’t understand. She loves me so deeply and so openly when loving people is hard for her. When…lovingmehas been hard for people.”
“Loving you has been…” His brows crash low. “Wait a second. Did you just call mehypersexual?”
“Aren’t you?”
His mouth opens, closes. He swipes his hand over it. “Just because I’d like to with you does not mean I am unable to control my urges, Crimson.” He flicks a finger between our bodies lying beside one another, a mere two feet apart. “I think this is very good proof that I am able to, actually.”
“Hm.” Love that for me. “Well, don’t blame me. I didn’t want to be left out in the unasked-for diagnosing. You think I’m asexual?”
“You’re expressing to me that you aren’t attracted to men or women, so that’s what I’d call it.”
Interesting. “How do you know it’s not trauma-related? Men have not been good to me, and I’m not attracted to women.” I smile, absently. “Straight, with trauma. Put that on a t-shirt.”
Kaleb chuckles. “Trauma will heal in time, so I guess if that’s it, we’ll find out.”
“You’re going to heal me from my trauma in a matter ofmonths?”
“I, at the very least, Crimson, am going to be a man who is good to you.”
My brow arches. “While I have literally asked you to be a man who is bad to me?”
He rolls onto his side, bracing one muscular arm beneath his head as he faces me, reaches for my hair, strokes the waving strand. “I’m skilled in duplicity.”
“Touching time is over. We will not be touching me while our bodies are horizontal, thanks.”
He closes his fingers away from my hair. “Cruel mistress.”
A knock sounds at the door, and my heavy heart lists.Ava. Ava with lunch. Ava with lunch while I’m in bed with a man. Before my mind can settle, Kaleb makes an uncomfortable sound, and says, loudly, “Yes, baby. Just like—” He swears, hoarse, eyes fixed on me. “Good girl.”
My heart drops into my gut.
I…completely forgot what we were pretending to do in here. I am not looking forward to when this pretending stops and I have to explain myself.
Gossip moves like wildfire.
