Page 48 of Olivia's Only Pretending
And why would you think that would ruin it?I’d press my younger sisters.Stupid big-sister brain.
I pushed the pushy-big-sister thought away.
“You look like something’s going on up there.” Victor gave my foot a squeeze. His eyes were on me.
“Always.” I ran a hand through my hair, pulling my feet closer to me.
“Work stuff or life stuff?” he asked.
Us stuff, I thought quietly.
“I don’t know.” I looked down at my hands, knotted up in my lap. “I was thinking how our friendship feels so easy. It feels so easy to let you into my life. It’s never felt like that with anyone else. What is it about you?”
“Maybe it’s because I show up at your door even when you tell me you don’t need any help,” he said in a self-deprecating tone, mostly jokingly.
But the words cut straight to my heart.
Most people walked out my door without notice, but Victor was the opposite. He wouldshow upwithout notice.
Dad had slipped out the door even though I cried for him to stay. For so long, I cried for him to stay.
Ryan had packed his bags and left, even though I wasn’t going with him. Even though he’d told me he would stay.
But Victor always showed up.
He was over here even when I told him I was perfectly fine without any help. If he knew I was in pain, he’d show up with a bag of supplies. If he knew I was sad, he was hanging birdhouses in my backyard.
I didn’t have to ask, or hint, or hope for him to care. He just did it.
“You’re joking, but it’s true. You do show up. I know I can count on you to show up.” I curled my body to face his against the sofa cushion.
His eyes softened on me.
“You make my heart feel safe.”
It sounded cheesy, but it felt true. One of my favorite things about Victor was also one of the scariest things about him.
When we were together, I felt like I let my shoulders drop and my mask slip. I’d forget I was Put Together Olivia. I didn’t have to be the smartest one in the room, big sister, mother number two, and instead, I could just be the same Olivia I was as a little girl.
“Your heart deserves to feel safe, Liv.” Victor’s eyes were narrowed fiercely. “I hate you’ve had idiots let you down. You should’ve always been treated with care.”
Hearing Victor talk about my heart felt like we were letting the lines between us get even blurrier.
“Yeah, sometimes I hate it, too. But I don’t regret the person I am and the life I have for a second. I’ve learned something from every relationship I’ve had.” I sighed. “Plus, who knows if I’d appreciate what a great friend I have in you if I hadn’t gone through some of it?”
“I think you would,” he said. “I’m pretty dang amazing, you know.” He pumped his brows.
I let my head fall back laughing.
He yanked on my feet to get my attention again. “Okay, okay. I wanted to ask you something. Do you remember Katie asking about the rehearsal dinner and stuff yesterday?”
“Yes. She asked if I’d be your date.”
He swallowed. “You said you wanted to be my date. Is that true?”
His shoulders straightened. His jaw tightened. My response mattered to him.
“I’d be honored,” I said in a playful tone, trying to ease the tension. “Plus, I owe you. You’ve been my date a couple of times now and counting. It’s only fair.”
