“You looked like you needed rescuing,” he states it so dryly, I straighten.
“What, no. I’m always happy to do what my family wants to do.” It sounds pathetic even to my ears. His eyes narrow a fraction, and I shrink.
“Exactly. What do you want to do, Dale?”
I suck in a breath—he was the first to call me Dale, and only calls me it when we’re not around my mother. It’s a small light in the darkness—a chance to be someone different, and it always makes butterflies erupt in my stomach.
“I suppose come to church, like I am.” He shakes his head, his eyes narrowing farther. “Fine, I’d rather be home reading probably.”
His eyes begin to gleam with my admission, like I just revealed some dark secret to him. “What a bad girl you are Dale.”
His mocking makes me stand taller, annoyance flickering with another emotion low in my belly that I always get when I’m around him. “I’m not as innocent as I seem, Mateo. Truly. I do plenty of bad things.” This makes him smile, and I swear the ground sways beneath me.
“Tell me just one bad thing that you do.”
I blink at him. We’re standing in front of the Sale Barn that doubles as the local church on Sundays. There’s people milling around, and the priest has to be somewhere nearby. Heck, god is present and listening with a watchful ear.
But at this moment, I want to tell him every dark secret Ihave. Like I’m at confessional, and he’s my priest, waiting to absolve me of my sins.
“I—” He waits, his smile growing in time with the heat crawling up my neck. “I like to read dirty books. And even though I’ve never been kissed, I like to imagine each of the men in those books kissing me, the way they do to those they’re in love with.” My eyes widen.
Why the heck did I tell him that much?
His grin doubles in size at that, and I can hear his wheels turning. And then his smile melts completely.
“Did you just say you’ve never been kissed?” His voice is barely a whisper, but it’s husky, and my embarrassment grows.
“I mean, I did, but?—”
“You’ve never been kissed?”
I cross my arms over my chest. “Would you like to announce it during prayer requests today?”
He shakes his head, a look of confusion spreading across his face. “How can you go out into the world where people will be hungry to take advantage of your innocence, and not even know what is and isn’t a good kiss?”
Another good point as to why the world is going to destroy me in a matter of months.Thanks for that, Mateo.
“I’ll find someone willing eventually.”
His head snaps up, eyes blazing for a second before he looks away. I suck in a ragged breath, caught off guard by the sudden shift in his mood.
Mateo’s always kind, level-headed, playful even sometimes. But I’ve never seen him angry, and certainly never been on the receiving end of such ire.What did I say?
“No.”
“No, what?” I grumble, getting more and more frustrated by the moment. Before I can demand answers, he grips my elbow, and begins to pull me back toward the parking lot. He looksback over his shoulder, but not down at me—back at the doors to see if anyone is watching. Considering service is about to start, most people are already at their seats.
Which is where I should be.
I tug on his hand, but he only grips tighter and I hiss. I can do nothing but stumble along behind him, tripping on my shoes and the constricting hem of my dress.
“Where are we going?” He doesn’t respond, instead walks a little faster. “Mateo, slow down. I can’t keep up.”
We round the side of the building, and instead of continuing to the cars like I half expect, he pulls me into a shaded part of the building, tucked out of view from watchful eyes. My chest presses against the fabric of the dress as I suck in panicked breaths.
“Mateo, what the heck are we doing?” I don’t dare say it louder than a whisper, afraid of how this might look to someone who stumbles upon us.God forbid my parents—my mother would have a heart attack.
The thought makes me pull back, but he doesn’t let my arm go. His eyes search my face, something desperate crossing his features. I’ve never seen him so out of control before, and even as it terrifies me, it electrifies me too. As if my body has a mind of its own, I reach my free hand out, resting it on his cheek. A part of me aches to reassure him.