Page 92 of Sinful Like Us
But fuck it all. I’m tired of shutting up when I crave skin-and-fucking-bones to make amends.
Akara spends an extra long minute running his fingers down the window’s seal.
“We’re going to have to talk at some point.” My voice sounds too loud in the quiet.
He goes still. “We probably shouldn’t make that point today.”
My muscles tense. “You need to get something off your chest? I can handle it.” I’d much rather him just ream me the fuck out. I’m used to superiors spit-yelling at me. I’m used to shackling on the blame, but I can’t do that until he gives me the weight.
Akara turns around finally and leans back against the windowsill. He crosses his arms over his chest, and his expression is one of profound discontent. “Like I said, you don’t want to do this today.”
“What if I do?”Just yell at me, goddammit.
He shrugs. “It’s your funeral.”
I nod, ready for it.
Akara takes a breath and sizes me up. “Normally, I’d love this twin swap. Pulling one over on Epsilon—classic.” His eyes land on mine in a glare. “But I honestly hate this whole thing because I could have had a week without you. Joke is on me, per fucking usual.”
“What do you want me to do?”
“Go back in time,” Akara says coldly. “The moment you started fucking your client, you come to me and tell me you crossed that line.That’swhat I want, but we’re too late for that.”
I grimace. “I didn’t want to put that on you—”
“I’m yourfuckinglead.” He steps away from the window in hot angered movements. “You, out of everyone, should understand what that means, but instead of giving me the same respect I would’ve given you, you decided to shackle me and dump me on the bottom of an ocean. We could have come up with a solution together because that’s what friends do. But you and me, we’re not friends, are we?”
Hurt claws down my back.
I can count on my hand the amount of real, honest and good friendships I’ve made over the years. Ones where people don’t treat me and my brother like one person or an object or something to poke fun at.
Akara might have been the most real friendship I’ve ever had, and I feel it slipping through my fingers, already obliterated to dust.
“I blew it,” I tell him, my chest on fire. “I didn’t know how to tell you about Jane without implicating you.” I inhale sharply, bottling a stronger emotion. “Akara, I thought I was sparing you the blame.”
“You’re on my Force. You’re one of mine.” He removes his baseball cap and bunches it in a tight fist. “Your mistakes are my mistakes. What you were trying to do isn’t even possible. And I feel like such…a fucking idiot.” He sighs in frustration and throws his cap onto the mattress.
I’m rigid, muscles strained. “Are Price and Sinclair still giving you hell?”
He glances over at me and raises his brows. “That’s what we’re not going to do. You lost the privilege to talk with me about that shit.”
“You’re really going to shut me out?” I lower my voice. “Banks isn’t here. Who else do you have to talk to aboutthat shit?”
It was always him and me. My brother couldn’t give a rat’s ass about the lead position, but Akara and I were bred for this.
“No one,” he says. “But lucky for you, we don’t have to spend another minute together.” He bends down and grabs the strap to his duffel. His eyes ping to the bathroom door. It’s a Jack & Jill style that leads to another bedroom where Jane, Sullivan, and Luna sleep.
I shake my head, fucking confused. Maximoff and Farrow handed out room assignments, and they intended for me and Jane to use the bathroom as a way to secretly switch during the night. They also put O’Malley, Tony, and Will on the furthest side of the house, so they wouldn’t overhear Jane and me.
But that plan involved Akara agreeing to it.
He didn’t.
“I don’t understand.” I rest my hand on my taut shoulder. “If I remember correctly, you saidfuck no, I’m not letting you get laid every night.”
He nods. “You don’t deserve it. But I realize in this moment that I don’t deserve having to share space with you. Have whatever sex you want, I’m out.” He aims for the door.
My pulse hammers, and I take a couple strides to intercept him. “Wait.” I grab onto his arm.
