Page 50 of Trust Me
“She told me you guys have been dating each other for months, that you never broke up like you told me, and you have been sleeping with me to,” Avery says while making the air quotes, “get sex with other women out of your system so you guys can settle down and get married.”
“That’s ridiculous, Avery. I’m not in any relationship with that woman. I went on a few dates with her months back and realized she wanted more out of our dates than I did. I broke it off with her and haven’t talked to her since.” Maddox makes a grab for me, but I pull back out of his grasp.
“So, I could check your phone and there won’t be any calls from her?”
His face begins to take on an angry look for the first time, his eyes starting to fill with fire. I’m pretty sure he wasn’t expecting me to question his phone calls like some crazy, jealous girl. “There might be calls, but all from her. She’s called me a few times, and I rarely answer,” he replies with his hands firmly on his hips, irritation evident on his handsome face.
“She had a picture of you and her together from last night,” I say, my voice small and afraid.
Maddox stops and thinks back. “Right. Last night. I met Jake at Jack’s Pub after work like I told you I was going to. We each had two beers and before we could leave, Vanessa came in with a group of friends. She said they were celebrating her birthday, and she was taking pictures with all her friends. She snapped that picture before I could get away. I left after that.Alone,” hereiterates through gritted teeth.
I consider the fact Vanessa could have made more out of that picture than what really happened. It was possible.
My mind is reeling. I don’t know what to think or what to believe. Maddox is standing before me with a look of desperation on his face.
“I’m sorry,” I mumble and take a step toward him.
“You really think I’m cheating on you, Avery?” The hurt in his voice is now evident and cuts at me. “You think I’d screw around on you or on her with you? That’s what you think I’m capable of? Dating two or more women at the same time?”
“I didn’t know what to think. She totally blindsided me. She had this big elaborate story complete with pictures. What was I supposed to think, Maddox?”
He glares down at me, hands still perched firmly on his hips. “You’re supposed totrustme, Avery. Trust in me, in us. Trust that I would never do what Drake and Kevin did to you. That what I feel for you is more than what anyone should feel for someone.”
“What do you feel?” I ask in a hushedwhisper.
“Doesn’t really matter, does it? You made it pretty damn clear what you think of me.” He turns to walk out the door.
“Wait! I do trust you!” My voice is pleading, tears streaming down my face.
“No, you don’t, Avery,” Maddox says in an even, serious tone. “If you did, we wouldn’t be having this conversation, we would be laughing about how catty and ignorant that woman is. I’ve been one-hundred-percent honest with you from the very beginning. I’ve done nothing to make you think that you couldn’t trust me.”
I look up into his chocolate eyes, mixed with so much hurt and anger. He works his jaw back and forth as if trying to calm himself down.
“I’m trying, Maddox. Really, I am,” I mumble through the lump in my throat.
“You know what your problem is? You don’t really want to be happy. You just sat back, angry at the world for handing you guys like Drake and Kevin and waited for the first chance where you could think I was betraying you so you could bail. You’ve been looking for your chance to run. If you really wanted to be happy, you would be. You’d let go of the past, of whathappened before me, and just be with me. You can’t have me and still live in the past, Avery. Drake and Kevin are done. Gone. And guess what, honey. Not everyone is like them.Iam not like them. I thought you, of all people, would know that about me.” He stops and takes a breath, then looks down at me, his anger still marring his normally content face.
“I guess I’m just glad I learned all of this before I fell for you any harder. I’m not Drake, Avery. Maybe if you found the trust and faith in me that I found in you, you would have been able to see that. I don’t think I can compete with the ghosts of your exes,” Maddox says with a shake of his head. “Goodbye, Avery.”
And with that, he walks out the door and out of my life.
*****
The first week without Maddox was the worst pain I’ve ever felt. My heart physically hurt in a way I never knew possible. This is so much worse than what I felt after Drake or Kevin. Maybe because what I had with Maddox was so much more. But I’ll never know how much moreit could have been now. I let my trust issues get in the way of the best thing to ever happen to me, outside of Brooklyn.
I called Will Monday night after I got off work. He was off work fortunately, so he came over and helped me by distracting Brooklyn. Then he sat with me on my couch and held me while I cried.
I decide not to go to our Sunday family dinner tonight, making up some excuse about not feeling well. I don’t want to face my family right now, especially Jake. I don’t know if he’d bring Maddox to dinner or not, but I’m not chancing it.
When a knock sounds on my door at eight thirty, I hesitate to go answer it. Part of me hopes it’s not Maddox, while the other part, a bigger part, is hoping it is. I just don’t want to feel that overwhelming disappointment if it turns out not to be him.
I step up to the door and glance through the peephole. Jake. I open the door to let my oldest brother in. He’s standing on the porch with concern etching his face. He walks in and I go straight to my couch where I was just curled up in a blanket, staring blankly at the TV.
“So Mom says you’re sick. When I asked Will if he’s talked to you, he changed the subject.You look like crap, so what the hell is going on? Are you really sick?”
“I’m not feeling well, Jake.” He stares at me, his laser sharp eyes cutting right through me.
“Bullshit. You’ve never been a good liar, so spill.” He leans back and throws a leg casually up on his knee.
