Page 101 of The Good Girl Effect
“Fuck me harder, Jack. You won’t break me.”
With a punishing grip on her hips, I pick up my speed and intensity. She takes me in her arms, and I bury my face in her neck, getting off on the scent of her skin and the reminder that she’s mine.
“Look what you do to me,” I mumble against her skin. “You are mine, little bird. No one else can have you. No one else can touch you.”
“Yes,” she cries out, her legs wrapping around me tighter.
Usually, I’m eager to make it last, but not today. Today, I need to fill her up. This isn’t sex for pleasure. It’s sex for control. I’m marking my territory and staking my claim.
“I need to come inside you,” I mumble with a whimper, feeling the pulse in her neck against my cheek.
As she holds me closer, my hips still pounding relentlessly against her, she moans with each violent thrust. “I’ll take all of it. Give it to me.”
I growl louder as my climax approaches. The dresser creaks and trembles under our weight, but all I can think about right now is filling her up. Images of her swollen belly, my child growing inside, another seed planted to prove that she belongs to me, fill my mind. Within seconds, I’m coming hard, and instead of pulling out like I always do, I use her tight cunt to squeeze every last drop of my cum out of my body.
Her legs tighten around my waist to hold me there. My lips move up to her mouth, kissing her again, this time more breathlessly.
“Jack,” she whispers, so I pull my face away and stare into her eyes.
As she strokes my cheek, I know she wants to utter words she can’t. And I know what those words are because I want to proclaim them too. But even after acknowledging our feelings today, we can’t speak those words to each other. Not without the inevitable heartbreak that would follow.
It doesn’t matter that I love her or that she loves me. It doesn’t change anything—not really.
It just makes the stakes so much higher.
Rule #35: Someone will think you’re perfect—flaws and all.
Camille
Jack is lying on his back with my body draped across his chest like a blanket. We never do this, cuddle in bed together after sex. But words likeneverandalwaysdon’t last long with us. As it turns out, we’re very bad at following rules.
I wanted to tell Jack that I love him. The words were on the tip of my tongue, but I held back. Why? I almost forget now why we can’t be together. If we love each other like I think we do, then what could possibly stand between us? We might be worried for Bea’s safety, but can we truly expect to keep her safe from all heartache forever? Isn’t that unreasonable?
And even if things don’t work out with Jack, it doesn’t mean I can’t be a part of her life in some way.
Jack is worried for her because she’s already lost so much. That I understand, but protection from loss is not what she needs. Knowing that the adults in her life love her and will be there for her without fail is what she truly needs.
But if that’s the only reason we can’t be together, then why is there a nagging sense of guilt gnawing at my insides? Is theletter I found from him to Emmaline really a secret so dark that it would tear us apart?
No. But the fact that I’ve kept something from him this long might be.
We’re lying in silence, both of us clearly deep in thought, when he finally speaks.
“We’re having a grand reopening in two weeks. I’d like you to come with me.”
I lift my head. “Really?”
He nods, those dark green eyes holding me and keeping me safe and warm.
“People will see us together. Elizabeth and Julian and Phoenix…”
“I don’t care,” he mumbles as he lifts a hand and brushes a curl behind my ear.
“But…” I start, but then his fingers press softly to my lips to quiet me.
“Let me worry about them.”
This idea that he wants to bring me as his date is both terrifying and exhilarating. It’s everything I want and everything I’m scared of at the same time. Am I ready to be Jack’s girl for real? Because if we show up together, then I will be. No one brings their child’s nanny to a sex clubprofessionally.
