Page 14 of The Missing Book
“We shall go to the Temple,” Melford stated, as though Leopold had already decided that yes, he would do such a thing. “After luncheon? I will have the carriage prepared.”
Leopold opened his mouth to protest, only for Anna to nod fervently and clap her hands. “An excellent notion! I would very much like to visit there again.”
“The Temple?” Leopold repeated, not quite certain what such a place was nor why his sister and brother appeared so delighted at the prospect. “You have been there already?”
“I took Anna there a few days ago,” Melford answered. “I think it would be an excellent place for us all to go. That way, you can see that society does not speak of you any longer in the wayyou think, and Anna and I can enjoy being in the Temple again. After luncheon, then?”
Somehow, the arrangement was made without Leopold’s consent, for both Melford and Anna quit the room, arm in arm and discussing at length all that they might do that afternoon in ‘the Temple’. Concerned, Leopold made to go after them, wanting to state quite clearly that he would not go out into society just because they asked him to do so, only for the door to close in his face.
He sighed.
This last week had been very trying indeed. Every time Leopold had thought about stepping out, he had felt a creeping humiliation take over again. He had imagined the faces of those he passed by, imagined the whispers that would be shared about him, and had felt himself near frozen in panic. His responsibility to Anna had been set to one side, though it still had been a heavy burden upon him. He had never felt such shame before, had never experienced what it was like to endure such mortification! It had paralyzed him, keeping him back from society, from even his family,andhis duties towards them.
But they are right,he thought, closing his eyes tightly.I cannot hide away forever. I must continue with my duty towards Anna, for that is what is expected of me.
Cold ran down his skin and he shivered, despising himself for his own weakness. If only he had not been so distracted by Lady Amelia! If only he had set her aside, had done his duty to Lady Gwendoline as they had danced by paying her his complete attention! He had not done so, had allowed himself to become preoccupied by another lady then this situation would never have come about!
“But I must overcome,” he told himself aloud. “And the only way to do that is to face society.”
Quite sure thateveryone he passed was sending him a dark glance, Leopold pulled his hat down a little further over his forehead.
“You need not look so afraid,” Melford stated, a little too loudly for Leopold’s liking. “There is nothing wrong. No one is giving you the cut direct.”
“Look!” Anna exclaimed, as she hurried forward. “There is Lady Gwendoline!”
Leopold stopped dead, the urge to turn on his heel and walk in the opposite direction flooding him. He had not spoken to Lady Gwendoline since the night of the ball and knew full well he had failed in his duty there.
“Enough, brother,” Melford grunted, one hand on his shoulder, gently pressing him forward. “You cannot hide from this.”
“I do not seek to hide.”
“Then what is it?” his brother asked, his hand lifting. “Do you have a particular interest in Lady Gwendoline? Do you wish to court her?”
Leopold snorted at this remark, seeing his brother’s eyebrows pull together. “Certainly not! I danced with her only out of obligation. I should not eventhinkabout furthering my acquaintance with her, given her standing.”
This made Melford’s eyebrows lift.
“Her father is not impoverished but he certainly does not have a great fortune. Indeed, I have heard recently that it has dwindled all the more! And his estate requires some repairs which have not yet taken place,” Leopold stated, in answer to his brother’s unspoken question. “She would not be at all suitable. As I have said, I only danced with her because it was what one ought to do.”
Melford rolled his eyes. “Then there is nothing to prevent you from going to her! There is no need for awkwardness. Indeed,the sooner you speak with her, the better it shall be.” Walking away, he left Leopold to stand alone, fear beginning to tighten his heart.
His throat constricted as he tried to take a step forward, seeing Lady Gwendoline greet Anna and then Lord Melford enthusiastically. She was walking very well indeed, Leopold noticed, relieved that there was no lingering damage from the incident.
I shall apologize,he told himself, forcing one foot forward and then the other.That is all that I can do at this juncture.
“Oh, yes, I quite agree,” he heard his sister state. “Have you seen the most valuable one there? It is so very plain looking, I must say, I was astonished to see it!” She turned her head as Leopold approached, her smile fading a little. “My brother is come to join us, as you can see. He has not been in ‘the Temple’ before, I am sure.”
Leopold inclined his head, his breathing quickening. “Good afternoon, Lady Gwendoline. I do hope you are well.”
She looked at him coolly. “Lord Broughton.”
His mouth went dry, fully aware that her disinclination towards him was well deserved.
“My brother is mortified about what took place,” he heard Anna say, a buzzing growing louder and louder in his ears. “Though I have informed him that society is no longer whispering about it all.”
Leopold, hating that Anna was speaking about him as though he was not present, was forced to speak. “I am, as I wrote to you, dreadfully sorry for what happened. It was entirely my fault and you – ”
“Yes, it was.” Lady Gwendoline interrupted him, making Leopold’s face flush hot. “What is worse, I think, is that you walked from the floor without so much as stopping to assist me! I cannot imagine why you would do such a thing. That is not inthe least bit considerate and for a gentleman who is meant to be so fixed upon such things, I must confess I was astonished at you.”
