Page 167 of To Scale the Emerald Mountain
Alec chuckles. “You never expressly stated that it is something you want to do.”
“I suppose you’re right.”
Dropping his hand, I place mine against his chest, taking in his handsome face, his dark brows tensed, still reserved; but he places his hands on my hips and pulls me closer.
“I shouldn’t have lashed out at you. I know you have been waiting for me to voice my wishes concerning Locane, and I haven’t. I’m not angry with you for making a decision when I couldn’t.” He exhales audibly, bathing me in his relief. “I don’t know, Nana said something to me that makes sense. Having him executed while he’s chained and dampened with iron isn’t justice to me.”
“I understand, my clove. Why did you not just tell me that?”
“I’ve been having a hard time putting words to my thoughts,” I admit, and Alec squeezes my waist with reassurance.
“Do you have anything in mind for him?”
I bite my lip, unsure how to tell him the other half of Nana’s assumption. “I want him to see my victory in what he was fighting so hard for.” My voice is barely a whisper as I watch Alec’s reaction.
He pulls his head back, regarding me with confusion. “What do you mean?”
“Nana asked me if I didn’t want to see Locane dead because I want to find my justice in beating him in this game.” Running my hands up to Alec’s face, my fingers grazing through his beard, just the feel of him beneath my hands soothing my own anxiousness. “I think I do. I want him to think that there is still a chance for him before I—the girl who he thought so fucking useless—take it all. And then I will get my vengeance.”
Alec pulls away with disbelief. “You want to let him go?”
My pulse races while I think of the fight ahead. Satisfaction tears through me at the thought of seeing Locane’s utter defeat before I rip out his heart, like he did mine.
I smile coyly. “Maybe not flat out set him free. But we know that he has recruited others. Don’t you think they will try to come for him again?”
“You want me to stand idly by if Locane makes for an escape?” Incredulity is thick in his tone and expression. “And let the royal guards appear utterly incompetent?”
I shrug. “He almost got out today. You said yourself the previous guards were powerful, and they were incompetent. It’s not known that you have your brother imprisoned. No one has to know when he gets out.”
“Ellya, he is dangerous,” Alec states seriously.
“I know he’s dangerous.”
“What if he tried to take you again?” Fear laces his words, and he pulls me against him.
“He won’t. He can’t. I fought him even when I was caught off guard. I’m prepared now.” I give Alec a wicked grin. “And also far more powerful.”
Alec’s grip on me tightens. “If we let Locane go, he could reach the next gem long before we do. He has devoted his life to this search.”
I know that it’s a gamble, that Alec makes a fair point. Still, warring emotions claw at my chest, and I stand firm that this may be a way to quell both mine and Alec’s anguish regarding his brother. Alec clearly doesn’t want to be the one to kill him, and I very much do.
“I know,” I whisper, running my hands up his shoulders. “But he wasn’t able to locate the emerald—a gem he had already encountered. How much progress could he have truly made in the quest?”
He shakes his head. “This is insane.”
“All of this is insane,” I counter before reaching up on my toes to briefly meet my lips with his.
Alec pulls me closer, breathing me in. “If something happened to you…” he starts desperately, but I hold up a hand to stop him.
“Something could happen to me anyway. And if it does, then I will wait for you to join me in true death.” I smile at him reassuringly.
Alec doesn’t look reassured; instead, he scowls. “Do not say that. My psyche cannot handle thoughts of your death right now. I have tortured myself far too much already. But I must offer you an apology, as well, my clove,” he murmurs against my mouth. “For being harsh with you. And I admit, I have been experiencing insecurities these last weeks that are new to me and often send my mind wandering to less than desirable places. I apologize for doubting your reasons for not wanting him executed.”
“Insecurities?” I ask surprised.
Alec gives me a timid dip of his head. “Rejection is a concept I am not wholly familiar with.”
“And you say I’m a brat,” I tell him playfully.
