Page 184 of To Scale the Emerald Mountain
His shoulders sag with relief, and he lays down on his back, rubbing both hands over his face.
“Are you alright?” I ask him again, and he pauses.
“Yes. I am alright.” And I feel the truth of that as well. “I had wondered how Locane got my blood to try severing our bond. It seems I now have an answer.”
I take one of Alec’s large hands in mine. “Why haven’t you told me about the opium before?”
“That is a part of my history I am not proud of,” he admits, squeezing my hand. “I had always planned to tell you, to tell you everything. I wanted to wait, to tell you in the most intimate way possible.”
“Tell me now?” I ask him quietly.
Alec hesitates before swallowing hard and nodding.
We speak few words but communicate endlessly.
We share everything with each other over the next few days. We share our memories and our pains. Alec shares his struggles in his younger years to find purpose and ways to ease his inexplicable sadness, to be happy without drowning in numbness.
I share the heartaches of my father’s indifference towards me throughout my childhood while doting on my brothers. I don’t share images of my intimacies with Locane, only the crushing weight I felt when it was over. I share my confusion, regret, self-loathing, and self-destruction that were born from that one act as much as Locane’s other abuses.
We share beyond our hurts. Exchanging these things with each other in a far more intimate way than how our shared mind power works. We are able to send each thought straight through our bond and experience it together.
We spend all of our time skin to skin, even when Alec’s not buried within me. Webs of our electricity constantly spread across each other’s bodies, as if our magic is hungry for us to learn every inch of each other as well. Our currents mingle together to create colors never before seen in this world.
With each pass of power we feel, we familiarize. With each kiss, caress, thrust, gaze, memory, and thought, our bond grows and strengthens into a titanium line between us, becoming impenetrable. Unbreakable.
I become him and he becomes me in a sense. But then again, that is what we were always meant to be.
Perhaps the Fates created me for Alec because they knew he would need someone to fill the hole that Locane would leave behind—the torn and decayed fabric of their bond swaying in a darkened breeze. Perhaps they made me for Alec because they knew in giving me to my broken family, I would have a hole of my own from the day I was born. An endless chasm that only someone like an extraordinary mate, someone just for me, could stand at its precipice and gaze into its darkness with me.
Whatever the reason, I thank the Fates all the same for giving me what is mine.
Alec sits up with his back against the headboard as I straddle him, taking him deep and riding him slow, languid, unhurried. Our faces are close, the tips of our noses barely skimming. Our eyes are locked as we share gentle breath. His hands graze in lazy strokes up and down my sides.
“Take what you need from me,” Alec breathes with passion. “I will give you everything I have, everything I am. My heart, my soul, all my earthly possessions. And when I have nothing left to give, I shall cut myself open and bleed at your feet while I beg you to take that from me too.”
Letting loose a breathy moan, I cradle his face between my hands. Our lips barely connect as I ask him, “What about you? What do you need?”
“This,” Alec says. He kisses me deep before telling me, “This is all I need.”
We find our pleasure together as I send a wave of overpowering love and adoration through our bond.
I will never be as good as Alec at verbally expressing my care; never come close to the caliber of gifts he comes up with to show me his affection.
But I can do this. I can show him what he means to me in the most visceral way, and that matters more than words or materials.
CHAPTER FIFTY-TWO
ELLYA
On the third morning of our mating glow, I wake to the bright sun streaming through the arched stained windows, splashes of warm jewel toned light painting the large, masculine body draped across me.
I close my eyes, in my waking moments experiencing a mixture of deep heaviness and giddy excitement. Today is the day we will leave The Capital without knowing when we will return. Opening my eyes again, I find Alec awake and watching me, giving off the same tight anticipation.
“Good morning, Ellya,” he tells me in his deep, sultry voice that makes my thighs clench.
“Stop. Unless you want to postpone our departure to stay in this room, naked, all day.”
He chuckles with unbridled amusement. “All I did was tell you good morning.”
