Page 30 of Mine to Keep
Once we’ve caught our breath, I let go of Javier’s wrists and raise up onto my elbows. I kiss him gently, rolling my tongue over his languidly. Javier sighs into my mouth, locking his legs tighter around me.
I pull away and drag Talon closer to me, making love to his mouth just as I did Javier’s. Talon slides closer, taking my bottom lip between his teeth, biting down gently.
Breaking the kiss, I look between the two of them, an easy smile cropping up on my face. “Come on, my boys. Let me clean you up.”
I ease out of Javier and he winces when he sits up. “Think we can all fit in that big ass tub?”
“Not sure,” Talon says, stretching his willowy arms over his head. “But we could always try.”
We couldn’t all fit in the tub, but we can in the shower. I clean them both up, since neither seem like they have the energy to do it themselves. I’m tired too, but I live in a constant state ofexhaustion. I can do whatever needs to be done, even if I’m only running on forty hours of sleep in one month.
After we’re clean, we slide our pants back on and—after I move my gun—lie in my bed, both boys lying snug against me.
“Is this okay?” Talon asks, sitting up so he can meet my eyes. “We don’t have to sleep in here. We can go back to our room if you want to be alone. I don’t mind. Neither does Javier. Right?”
Javier nods, sitting up like Talon.
I yawn as I pull them back down to me. Their warm weights feel good against me. “No. Stay. Y’all tired?”
Javier yawns, nodding against my shoulder. “I don’t usually stay up so late.”
“What time is it?”
Talon reaches over and checks my phone. I’m glad no one but Peggy has that number. I’m sure The Void would have messaged me some bullshit and Talon would wonder what “You have a target” means.
“Eleven fifteen. I’m so tired. Still jet lagged.”
“Get some sleep,” I say, kissing them both on the nose. Their adorable smiles do funny things to my chest.
Talon sighs and snuggles closer. “So…you’re a Daddy? I could tell. You have that vibe. I felt it when we sat beside you at the airport. Like a protector. You take care of people.”
I grin sardonically. “In a way.”
“We…” he pauses and looks over at Javier. “We need that.”
“I know, little one. I’m here now.”
A smile lights up his face and he kisses me quickly. Javier follows up with a lingering kiss of his own, his eyes bright.
I’ve never felt this before. This light, happy feeling. Nothing in my life is light or happy. I deal in death. Everywhere I look is blood and gore.
But Talon and Javier? They’re light. They’regood. Even if it’s just until we go our separate ways, I hope I can earn being in their light.
ten
comfort
Sunlight streamsthrough the window of the room, rousing me from my sleep. I open my eyes slowly, looking first at Talon on my left, then Javier on my right, both tucked tight to my body.
I sigh, looking up at the ceiling for a few moments. It’s been months since I woke up feeling well-rested. My muscles don’t ache, my eyes aren’t itchy, and my thoughts aren’t clouded. I also didn’t have a nightmare.
Ever since Adelane, I’ve had different variations of the same dream. Fire, skin tight under heat, gunshots, a heavy weight resting in my arms.
But last night, after coming my brains out and having Javier and Talon in my bed, I slept like I never have before.
Reaching over carefully so I don’t wake Talon, I grab my phone and check the time—seven fifteen in the morning. I slept for six hours. After getting snatches of sleep here and there for months, it feels good to rest so much.
With my phone in hand, I untangle myself from Talon and Javier, tucking the blanket back around them before I leave the room and walk out to the balcony. I shut the door behind me and take a seat on one of the lounge chairs outside.
