Page 43 of Ronan
“We definitely can play around with that,” he agrees, sitting forward to kiss along my throat. “How about we make it Nightbreed?”
Fitting, all things considered. Nodding, I lean in to kiss him again, savoring the waybutterflies scatter. “Did Orion know?” I ask curiously. “I feel like he knew.”
That makes him full on chuckle. “Of course. He’s always known you’re my favorite color.”
Something about that eases tension in my chest. This isn’t some... conquest thing or an accident. He knows exactly what he wants, and it’s me. Is that why he hasn’t had a girlfriend in years?
Studying his face, I shake my head slowly. “You should’ve just told me, Ro.”
“I know. And now that you’re right here with all the facts, staring me in the eyes without flinching, I know I was a coward. You think you can forgive me for that? If not... I have some things I’d like to try to change your mind. If you’re up for it, that is.”
He doesn’t need to change my mind, but I’m curious what he has up his sleeve. “Yeah? Like what?”
In response, he flicks his tongue along my pulse point. “Like eating you until you cry. Would you like that, pretty girl? Would you like being able to see my face as I take you apart?”
The reaction inside of me is almost violent. Hearing my step-brother talk abouteating my pussy is so fucking wrong, but I’m desperate for it. Even now, I can hear Nightbreed in his tone. I didn’t know I was capable of the mental gymnastics it took to deny who he really was under that mask, but now that the truth is out, I can’t hide behind fantasies. I’ll have to admit out loud that I want him, that I want my brother to ruin me.
But can I handle looking him in the eyes while he does it?
“Fuck,” I gasp, laughing nervously as I squirm on his lap. “I...”
His grip tightens on my hips, pinning me to him so I can’t escape if I wanted to. Good thing I don’t.
“Let me see you.” His head falls back slightly so he can meet my eyes, his dark blue gaze more intense than ever before. “Tell me the first time you ever imagined it.”
My cheeks heat up. I don’t think he’s talking about the innocent little crush I had on him when we first met, so I don’t bother telling him. Instead, I skip to the good part — the first time I made myself come thinking about him. “Do you remember the night you dropped me off at that football game? You took me on your motorcycle, and when we pulled into the parking lot, you reached back and squeezed my thigh to tellme to hang on. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I ended up leaving the game in the third quarter and nearly broke my vibrator that night.”
Biting his lip, I feel his cock pulse underneath me, almost as if it’s nodding in agreement with me. “I didn’t make it past my living room that night.”
“Was that the first time for you too?”
He shakes his head. “But it was the first time I did it without lying to myself. I didn’t try to replace you with someone else or convince myself that it was natural for my mind to drift to you as I came. I just fucking enjoyed it.”
We’ve wasted a lot of time. Blame it on society, blame it on our parents, blame it on us — the end result is the same. We barely have an age gap at all, I should’ve been in his bed the second I turned eighteen.
Six years we’ve wasted.
Six fucking years, and what good did it do? Ronan went to extreme — borderline crazy — lengths to have me in the only way he thought he could, and I learned just how far I’ll go to feel wanted.
“You’re not expecting any visitors this evening, right?” I ask, rolling my hips andleaning in to kiss his cheek. “Maybe you can just enjoy the real thing for a while.”
“It wouldn’t matter if I was,” he admits, standing so I have to wrap my legs around his torso as he carries me to the bedroom. “The entire world can fuck off. Forever.”
Warmth fills me as I bury my face in his neck and hold on. “I do have to work tomorrow, but other than that, I agree.”
“About that...” he trails off until he’s laying me back on his bed. “I lied about my job. I haven’t done social media management for about a year. I’ve been living off those thirst traps.”
My face falls, even though I try to control it. If he relies on those to make a living, I can’t ask him to stop making them. That means hundreds of thousands of other people will continue looking at him, fantasizing about him, and he’ll keep flirting with them all in his comments to boost the videos.
I think I hate it a little bit.
Exhaling slowly, I nod. “This is a lot to unpack, Ro. I didn’t even know you had tattoos let alone this whole secret life.”
“I know. I’m sorry. We can talk about it later, yeah? Tell me I can keep going.”
There’s a wild desperation in his eyes as he realizes how that made me feel, like he’s worried I’m slipping away, and there’s only one thing I can do to ease his mind.
This is a lot, but something tells me it’ll be worth it.
