Page 11 of Blood & Honey
This isn’t a mistake.
Last night was perfect.
I twist my hair into space buns until I can wash all the product and sand out.The thought of what he wants to talk about has my stomach souring.What if he regrets it all?Regrets me?I stare at the bruises on my inner thighs, remembering how wicked he looked with his head between them.I touch my fingertips to my skin, tracing the bruised outline of his rough fingertips, wishing his mark won’t ever fade away.Heat fans up my neck, spreading like wildfire as images of our night dance in my head.
I had sex with Blood for the first time, and it was pure magic and better than I could dream.Melissa said her first time hurt and was over as soon as Brian stuck his dick in her.She didn’t get any pleasure from the act at all.Her second time with him wasn’t much better.Though she said after about the fifth time she started to enjoy it.Sounds tragic if you ask me.
I’m glad I waited for a real man like Blood.A man who has experience and knows how to touch a woman.I catch my reflection in the mirror that hangs on the back of my bedroom door and wonder if I somehow look different.More mature.I certainly feel changed.
I smirk to myself and grab my favorite sundress from my closet.It’s yellow with thin spaghetti straps and a pattern of white daisies embroidered on the skirt.The breast area has underwire cups that make my boobs look great.I stare at the tattoo on my ring finger of Blood’s name.He has mine on his.We’re connected in every way.
On paper, in ink, in body and soul.
This wasn’t a mistake.
I remember the first time I ever laid eyes on the Saint’s Outlaws MC.Shelby was supposed to be watching me at the beach.We were going to go to the boardwalk and ride the Ferris wheel.She promised me cotton candy, but instead she forced me to walk past the clubhouse with her, because she was hoping to catch a glimpse of Blood.Back then, he was just Zain.We were standing on the sidewalk as a group of them roared past us on their motorcycles and into the parking lot.I’d never seen anything cooler until she pointed him out to me.
I clean my face with some makeup wipes and slap on some tinted moisturizer.A few dabs of perfume behind my ears and on my wrists and I’m ready to face my husband.
I find him where I left him.In the kitchen feeding my nephew.A sweet baby boy who needs a mother.Now I guess that is going to be me.It’s not the life I had planned, but Shelby left.Gave him up.I can do for him what she tried to do for me after our mother passed away.
Blood’s gaze finds mine, and for a moment he looks at me as if I’m the most beautiful woman he’s ever laid eyes on.“You hungry?I made extra eggs.”
“I’ll get something when I meet up with Melissa.”
“We need to talk.”
“This doesn’t have to be complicated or change anything,” I tell him, but we both know I’m lying.Everything has changed.We crossed a line.One there is no coming back from.
“I’m going to get an annulment.”
My heart drops to my feet.“So what?You just used me and now you’re throwing me away like you did Shelby.”
He inhales deeply then exhales slowly.“That’s not fair.”Even pissed off and broody, wearing that dead cold stare that would make the strongest of men wish for death, he’s sexy in nothing but a pair of black and gray board shorts with flames licking up the sides.
It’s true what they say about men with big hands and even larger feet.Heat scores my cheeks as I remember all too well what else he has that’s big.
“I didn’t throw her away.She walked away from me long before I ever stopped caring about her.”
I shrug my shoulder.“Then prove me wrong.Tell me last night meant something to you.That you didn’t use me.That I’m not just another girl who’s fucked the cold-hearted asshole, Zain Rogers.”
“Is that what you think of me?”
“No.I think you like me, but you’re too chickenshit to admit it.Are you going to deny that I turn you on?That you didn’t enjoy last night as much as I did, if not more.”
“You shouldn’t want to be with me, Ashley.I’m not the hero in your fantasy.I’m the villain.”
“I know.”
“You know?”His brow arches, his lips curl incredulously.
“You’d burn the world down for the people you love, Blood.That’s not a turnoff.Not to me.I think it makes you beautiful.”
“Don’t be sweet right now.I don’t deserve it.”
He turns his attention back to Ash.I’m not sure what’s going through his head.What I do know is that when he looks at me, my skin sets ablaze with a burning desire.One so powerful it threatens to consume me.Like a wildfire.
All I want is to go to him and beg him to see that we belong together, but I know I have to play it cool.Desperate isn’t attractive.Especially to a man like him.
