Page 71 of Above
“I’m fine, I promise.” A lie. A horrible, necessary one. Celeste knew it too. I had admitted the opposite to her in a letter.
“Nova is actually doing more than fine,” Altair said. Stars I wished he’d disappear. Scratching Death, his eyes on Celeste, he continued, “She’s the smartest in our trainee class by a mile,and she’s improving steadily in every other aspect. In fact, she is in the same division as Caleb Dofrel, and she has outshone him every step of the way. She even saved our entire class when we were poisoned. I’ve never seen anyone brew an antidote so quickly.”
“There’s a core boy in your trainee class?” Dad asked, his voice shrill and panicked. “Has he tried to hurt you?”
“Thanks for that,” I muttered to Altair. “I’m okay, Dad. I swear. Please, can we talk about something else? How is the shop doing?”
Mama saved the day again, chatting about the apothecary and going on to ask Altair more questions. My mind lost focus, my head swimming with panic and dread, the illusions seeping into my thoughts. When Celeste kicked me under the table, I startled and looked up at her, only to see blood dripping from her eyes and mouth. I shook my head, the image gone as soon as it appeared. My sister looked horrified, my expression apparently setting warning bells off in her head. So I smiled, quickly looking away.
Death had left Altair’s lap, opting instead to run to the entryway and gnaw on his expensive shoes he refused to part with, the leather likely now peppered with tooth marks.
For the rest of dinner, I allowed Altair to steal the show, though I’d normally rather stab him in the neck. But he was an expert at charming people, and he even won over Dad as he chatted about his family home and the architecture behind it.
When the meal was finally over, I hugged my parents, promising to see them in a month and kissing them each goodbye. Dad shook Altair’s hand and wished him luck. Mama gave him a hug that seemed to startle him, promising to write to him just as she did me, ever the loving soul. Celeste said nothing to him, but she did give me a tight hug, her reluctance to let go making me want to cry.
I hadn’t trailed her since I caught her leaving the house, but I figured she was still up to no good. Whatever it was, it pushed her farther from me. I could feel it in my bones—in my heart.
“I love you, Heavens.”
“I love you more, Starlight.” Celeste leaned in closer, her mouth against my ear. “I believe in you. Please don’t forget who you are.”
With that, she walked away, leaving me there to stew in her words. Sighing, I kissed my kitten goodbye, rolling my eyes when she rubbed against Altair. Then we were off.
Altair and I landed on the sandy beach, neither of us willing to be the first to shatter the silence that held the secrets of the night. It had gone surprisingly well, though the oddity of seeing him there ruined it. I wished he had never met them, because it would change nothing. He would still want me dead and continue his plight against of eadi. One day he would probably hire eadi servants that he too would abuse and kill. The cycle would continue, even if he did look back and remember a time when he was shown the truth of eadi. They were normal people, just as he was.
“I hadn’t realized sitting at a dinner table could be…joyous,” Altair stated, his eyes lifted to the stars. I allowed myself a rare moment to study him openly. Even in the eadi clothing, he was formidable, radiating opulence and power. The plain blue trousers and button-up black shirt could not hide who he truly was.
“Depends on the family I guess,” I responded with a shrug.
“Your mother is lovely. She reminds me of a servant I once had.” His response had me on the defensive, wishing I had never allowed him to trick me into kindness, but he was quicker than I was. “My favorite. Martha. The one who sang me lullabies that didn’t talk about death. She hugged me the same way. With her arms linked at my back.”
“She’s one of the best people I know,” I whispered, the wind oddly vacant from the beach as we stood there side by side. It was strange to feel as if I were in a state of equilibrium with Altair. Like we were experiencing a very rare moment of understanding. “That’s why I work so hard. To save them.”
“Let me guess, you’re dosing them with haya? Even the servants that didn’t piss off my father died before they hit seventy.” From the corner of my eye, I caught sight of him facing me. Studying me. But I refused to turn and break the spell that had us on mutual ground. “That won’t work for much longer.”
“I’ll figure out something more sustainable.” Crystallization, maybe. I hadn’t had the chance to try since I had gotten the supplies. Talon simply wouldn’t leave me alone long enough to escape to my lab before tonight.
“I have to kill you, Tershetta. You know that, right?”
“I know you’ll be forced to try,” I sighed, feeling the weight of the night.
Altair stepped in front of me, forcing my gaze to meet his. “Which means your family will die after.”
“Or maybe I’ll kill you first,” I threatened, feeling defensive over my family. Altair didn’t even flinch.
“Even then, you wouldn’t be able to save them. You can try, but you won’t succeed.” Another step had him nearly against me, his eyes earnest as he openly stared at me.
“Why are you saying all of this?” I questioned in a hushed voice, feeling so defeated that my body was growing too heavy to hold up.
“Because hope is a plague that will kill you and everyone you breathe near. Best to stifle it while you can.” Hand rising, he snatched one of my curls, toying with it.
“According to you, we’re dead no matter what.”
“But they don’t have to go right away.”
We both stilled, our oddly loud breaths and the crashing waves all that could be heard. What did he mean by that? Was he suggesting they could live if I stopped giving them haya? Or something else?
“Never took you for someone who had a soft spot for eadi.”
