“I heard that you can’t stop thinking about me and sex,” Az smirked. It wasn’texactlya lie; it just left out everything else he had heard. He snuggled Gabe to him and let him hide his embarrassment for a few moments.
Az was busy working through his own thoughts. He was a lust demon. He loved sex, and he thought about it all the time; he couldn’t help himself. Of course he wanted sex with Gabe.
Yet the idea that Gabe wanted to keep him around, wanted to have him visit? It was entirely too alluring. Az needed to be honest with himself: if Gabe had been totally uninterested in sex, he would have been ok with that, because he just wanted Gabe. He wanted to be near him and cuddle him and watch him work and talk with him.
Was that falling in love? Because he knew, logically, that this whole thing was impossible, but he couldn’t help feeling hope. Adam and Minos had made it work. He knew Adam was dead, and it was different, but with Gabe alive, maybe it would be easier? Maybe Az could just pop topside to visit him?
Although he didn’t want to just visit him; he wanted to be with him all the time. He didn’t want to go to the underworld without him.
Gabe made a muffled groan against his shirt, pulling Az out of his own thought spiral. He could tell Gabe was having his own moment of panic, and his first order of business was to reassure him and make him feel better.
He laughed again to lighten the mood, pulling Gabe out from hiding.
“Never be ashamed of your thoughts. Never be ashamed of what you want. Not with me,” he said firmly.
Gabe nodded his head, but he was still blushing a bit.
“Now, I had an idea for going out tonight for more experimentation, but perhaps you don’t want to go out. Perhaps you’d like to stay in.” Az gently caressed Gabe’s back as he said the last part. If Gabe was ready for sex, then Az was all in. He wasn’t sure if Gabe was quite prepared for that yet, though. If he had been, he would have joined Az in the tub when Az had hinted at it
“Um, what sort of going out for experimentation?” Gabe asked.
Az could have led the way into the bedroom at that moment and initiated sex. He knew that, and he knew that Gabe would enjoy it if he did. That wouldn’t really solve anything, though. Gabe was still nervous and unsure, and Az didn’t want that.
Az had figured out that Gabe was demisexual, but he was also more than likely reciprosexual; he needed to feel close to and really like someone to feel sexual attraction, but he also needed to know that the other person felt sexual attraction for him (and sometimes he needed to be hit in the head, figuratively speaking, with that sexual attraction).
If that were the end of it, though, Gabe would be dragging Az into the bedroom, not asking a lesser demon disguised as a frog for advice.
No, somewhere along the line, Gabe’s confidence and self-esteem had been severely damaged. Perhaps it was years of feeling different, or perhaps it was one of his relationships. Neither had been ideal, from what Gabe had told Az. He had dated a man who was deeply in the closet and then had projected his own insecurities on Gabe. He had then dated a woman who had, yet again, made Gabe feel as if he weren’t “normal” in his sexual preferences. He had let them both take the lead and had never felt comfortable taking the lead himself. Gabe was unsure, and self-conscious, and he questioned what he wanted and what he was supposed to do, so he tended not to do anything, always second guessing himself.
Az knew that there were certain things that turned Gabe on, however. He realized that Gabe enjoyed a little voyeurism, although Gabe would probably never recognize it as that. He had been extremely turned on watching Az get himself off. Reading about and watching porn with couples who were in love and had an emotional connection had also been a huge turn on for Gabe.
Gabe didn’t naturally fantasize about himself in sexual situations, but he enjoyed imagining others having sex, especially if they cared about each other. He didn’t put himself into the sexual fantasy, as some people often did. He liked watching others find their enjoyment.
He and Az had that in common. Yet another way they seemed to fit so well together. Az cut that train of thought off, though. He was not going to think about the rest of what Gabe had talked about. Not now, anyway.
Instead, Az was going to see just how far Gabe’s voyeurism went.
“There’s a club downtown. It’s very exclusive and has considerable protections in place, so you wouldn’t need to worry about anyone at your work finding out. It usually requires an extensive process to get in, but I’ll be able to handle that. I thought you might be interested in going and seeing what you thought of it,” Az said, still gently caressing Gabe’s back.
Gabe leaned into him, resting his head against Az’s chest again. His voice was muffled when he said, “Do you mean, like, a sex club?”
Az chuckled. “Yes, it is a sex club. You can wear whatever you like, however, and you don’t need to do anything at all. There is no pressure. We are merely going as observers to see what you might be interested in.”
“Is it, like, a bdsm club or something? Because I saw some porn where the improbable positions and forced dialogue just made me laugh. I don’t want to offend anyone,” Gabe muttered.
“It is a sex club. There are some areas that cater to different tastes, but all those rooms will be separate. You might see some threesomes or foursomes in the main room, since swapping is popular, but bdsm is separate. We can explore those areas or not, depending on how you feel. I can also assure you that this place caters to a lot of established couples, so it will be more like the second video we watched and less like the first,” Az reassured him. He had made sure of that in his research. He knew seeing random strangers hook up would not be as much of a turn on for Gabe.
“We don’t have to go,” Az continued. “I just know that watching sex doesn’t make you nervous, even if you don’t always find it hot. I thought seeing what you do find hot, in person, might be an interesting experience.”
“You’d like to go,” Gabe mumbled into Az’s shirt. He lifted his head up then and said, “You find watching sex hot.”
“I do. I find it very hot. I like to see people who care about one another give each other pleasure.”
Gabe moaned a bit in response, and Az smiled.
“Ok,” Gabe said. “But you’re gonna need to help me decide what to wear. I amnotthe sex club expert, and I’m guessing you definitely are,” he chuckled.
So Az conjured up some outfits and some dinner (no use going hungry, after all), then Gabe went off to shower and get ready for the evening.
