Page 86 of Just Say Christmas
“If there are people out there who’ll bash you if you give them a reason,” his father said, “you’d be wise not to give them one.”
“Would I, though?” Hayden asked. “Would I really? I’m not sure. I find myself eager to see.”
“Do people hit you for being gay, you mean?” Isaiah asked. “Why?”
“Yes,” Hayden said. “They do. I don’t know why. Jealous of my fabulousness, maybe. I’ve had a tooth out. Been knocked down and kicked while I’m on the ground, too.Thathurt.”
“That isn’t fair,” Casey said. “You can’t help it if you’re gay.”
“I didn’t know that,” Zora said. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because I was embarrassed,” Hayden said. “Why do you think? I was humiliated. That’s the point. Also,” he went on, shaking it off and looking like Lively Hayden again, “Luke is playing again on Saturday night, and on the Saturday after that, and I get to go and watch.”
“I’ll be on the bench,” Luke said. “For the first game, anyway, as my match fitness will be a bit questionable, just off the plane. Lucky they gave me the time off to come to Nyree’s wedding. You may get to see me play thirty minutes, though.”
“That’s all right,” Hayden said. “I’ll watch you on the bench. I just realized—I’m a rugby WAG. Who knew? They’re going to have to come up with a new word for me.”
“What’s a WAG?” Casey asked.
“Wives and girlfriends,” Isaiah said. “Like Mum was. Uncle Hayden will be a wife or boyfriend, he means.”
“Can’t wait,” Hayden said. “Paris Racing scarf, d’you reckon, Rhys? Pale-blue and white stripes? Fetching.”
“Very fetching,” Rhys agreed, a smile lurking around his mouth. “Good on ya,” he told Luke. “Good to have somebody in the stands. Is that a first?”
“Yeh,” Luke said, the color creeping into his ears and cheeks.
“And after that,” Hayden said, “in more announcing, in July, when Luke’s season is over, I’m going back for two wonderful weeks. July in Paris?That’sa time anybody would want to be there, and that time, Lukewon’tbe playing. Music festivals. Roses and roller coasters in the Parc Bagatelle. The palace gardens at Versailles, and the Cabaret at midnight. I’m going to make him be a tourist with me, because I want to see absolutely everything.”
“You could go to the top of the Eiffel Tower,” Isaiah said.
“We could,” Hayden said. “We definitely could.”
“Getting a bit ahead of yourself, surely,” Craig said.
“Am I?” Hayden glanced at Luke, his spark dimming a bit. “Maybe.”
“No,” Luke said. “Or maybe—why not get ahead of ourselves? In rugby, at least, you plan to win. You don’t plan for what you’ll do if you lose. You could learn a bit of French, maybe. You’ve got seven months until July.”
“Not always much stability in these relationships, from what I know,” Craig said. “To say the least. I wouldn’t buy your ticket if I were you.”
Luke’s ears were going red again. “He can buy his ticket,” he said.
“Dad,” Zora said. “No.”
“Could be we’ll have to prove you wrong,” Hayden said. “What will you say, I wonder, if Luke moves back here once he retires? Will you still be telling me we’re bound to break up, maybe cite some study you read about it? I’m curious. Is it that we’ll get bored with each other? I’m not going to get bored, and I’m not boring, either.”
“No,” Luke said, smiling a little now, and otherwise looking more or less like a very large and extremely well-grounded boulder. “Safe to say you’re not boring.”
“Give the ones you love wings to fly, roots to come back, and reasons to stay,” Hayden said. “That’s the Dalai Lama. That’s what I want. That’s what I think I’ve got. Finally. Luke’s got wings to fly already, and I’m going to do my best to make those wings beautiful. I’m going to do my best to give him a reason to stay, too.”
“I don’t know about the Dalai Lama,” Luke said, “but I know that I’m coming back to New Zealand. I’m keeping my apartment, though. An apartment in Paris is never a bad thing. Could be that I want to walk with you by the Seine, too,” he told Hayden. “In winter. In summer. Anytime.” Which Zora would bet was more than he’d said about his personal life in anything close to “public” for a long, long time. Or possibly ever.
“So if it’s not that,” Hayden asked his father, “What? Is it me that’s bound to cheat, or Luke? And why, exactly? Because all men cheat if they can, unless women are keeping them from having their fun, so how wouldtwomen be able to resist? I can resist. Let me tell you, I can resist. Maybe some men can’t. I can.”
Whoa.Hayden had neversaid anything like this. Not even close. It was like the dam was bursting. Casey and Isaiah were sitting still, their eyes going between Hayden and Craig as if they were watching a tennis match.
Craig said, “If things are so much better in Paris, maybe you’d rather stay there.”
