Page 118 of Just Come Over
“No punching,” Rhys said. “Absolutely not.”
“But if they say bad things about you,” Casey argued, “I’ll kind ofhaveto punch them, because I’ll be so mad that my brain will let go of my hand.”
“No letting go.” Rhys looked stern now, but at least he’d stopped looking tense. “Not an excuse. Tell your brain to keep hold of your hand. Here’s what you do instead. You say that you already knew I was Auntie Zora’s boyfriend, because we’re in love.”
“Eww,” Isaiah said.
This time, Rhys was the one who laughed. “All right. You may not want to say that. Just say that you know we’re going out, and it’s OK with you. And then throw in whatever nice thing you want to say about me, if you like.”
“But mostly the All Black part,” Isaiah said.
“OK,” Rhys said. “Mostly the All Black part. Whatever works. And Casey?”
“Yeah?”
“No punching.”
It was a truly lovely day.
Nothing like seeing your photo in the newspaper, reading a character assassination of the man you loved, and knowing every comments section would be full of discussion of his failings, without even having to look. Nothing like having five rugby WAGs, on opening their doors to you, giving you a hug and asking how you were doing. Nothing like having your mum call you, midway through your deliveries, to say, “I hate to say ‘I told you so,’ darling, but—I did tell you so. There’s a chat show on TV right this minute talking about it. Whether you can date your late spouse’s family member, and what effect it has on the kids. It can’t be pleasant to be a conversational topic, especially when the topic is your morals.”
“Which makes me wonder,” Zora said, keeping her focus on navigating the streets of Mount Eden on a busy Friday afternoon, “why you’re ringing me to tell me about it. What do you want me to do? Go into seclusion? Sorry, can’t. I’m making deliveries. Break it off with Rhys? The damage is done, isn’t it? Besides, I’m not doing it. Which would be because I’m in love with him.” She didn’t add,And I’m marrying him,because they had to tell the kids first, but she wanted to. She wanted the ring on her finger. She wanted to announce to the world that he was hers, and she was his, and to hell with what they thought of it. Casey wasn’t the only fierce girl in the family.
“I’m just telling you—” her mum said, and then stopped, presumably because she couldn’t work out a good version of what she was just telling her.
“Yeh,” Zora said. “Exactly.” She relaxed her legs, which were somehow gripping around the thigh area like that would help. “Rhys said weeks ago, when I said people would find out... uh...” She had to stop. What he’d actually said was, ‘Fuck ’em.’ She decided on, “He said, ‘Bugger ’em.’ That’s more or less my planned approach. Want to help me do it?”
“Well, of course I’m doing it,” her mum said, sounding cross. “What do you expect? And, really, Zora. That language isn’t appropriate for him to be using with you.”
“I’d better not tell you what he actually said, then.” She had to laugh, it was all so ridiculous. “What do I care what people say, really? And I’m almost at my next stop. Listen, Mum. Want to come with Casey and me tomorrow to do some shopping? She needs winter clothes, and she’s growing so fast. I’ve never shopped for a little girl before, and you were always so good at it. I need a few things for Isaiah, too, and you know he won’t try on. He has a play date with his friend Ethan, though, and I don’t have a wedding, so Casey and I are going to have a Girl’s Day. Want to meet us in Newmarket at ten?”
It was flattery, maybe, but why not? Isaiah needed a relationship with his grandparents, Casey was part of her life now, and so was Rhys. You could stay stuck in the mire, or you could keep moving and get out of it.
She tried to explain it to Rhys that night, the first chance she’d had to talk to him alone. Of course, the first thing he said was, “You OK?”
“Yes. Of course.”
“It was all over the news there, though,” he said. “Can’t have been pleasant.”
“On the other hand,” she said, “I’m not the one with a rugby game against fired-up opposition tomorrow, and it was probably good for business. I’m notorious, eh. I’ll have to remember to thank my Mum for giving me such an unusual name. And thank myself for using my unusual name for the business.”
“That can’t really be how you feel.” He sounded strong, as always, but tired, too. Rhys could stand up to anything. That didn’t mean it was easy to do it. “Victoria said I was ‘unavailable.’ That’s how you’re sounding.”
“Funny,” she said, “Hayden said the same thing. You’re not unavailable. You’re the last thing from it. Look at you last night, and today. Look at you right now, for that matter.”
“But you may be,” he said. “I don’t want to hear that you’re fine, or that it’s good for business. I want to hear the truth.”
“Oh.” That was a new thought. Thatshewas unavailable? So intent on keeping up a good front that even he felt shut out? She blew out a breath, sat back against the pillows, and looked out at her glassy black reflection in the floor-to-ceiling glass of Rhys’s bedroom. No help available there. It was going to have to come from inside.
“Right,” she said. “It’s this thing I thought today, then. That you and I have had this muddy spot in the road to get past on our way to the other side. We’ve stood there for a wee while now, staring at it, and now we’re in it waist-deep, because there was no way around. If I have to be here, though, you’re the man I want with me for it. If I lose my footing, you’ll hold me up, and if I can’t go any farther, you’ll carry me. I know you’ll haul me to safe ground if it takes your last breath to do it. Do you know how lucky I feel to know that?”
She’d thought that holding on today, getting through, was strength, and it was. But surely, it was also strength to admit that it hurt, to say that you could use some help. She said, “I want to keep on wading until we get to the other side, because it’s beautiful over there. And I want to be with you. Even if it’s muddy. Even if it’s hard. I want to be with you.”
It took him a few seconds, and when he finally answered, his voice wasn’t much steadier than hers. “Itisgoing to be beautiful. And you’re right. That’s what I’d do. I’m here to hold you, and I’m here to stay.”
“It’s not anybody else’s life,” she told him. “It’s ours. I’d rather be with the right man and have people tell me he’s the wrong one, than be with the wrong man and have everyone think he’s the right one. I’ve done that. It was rubbish. You’re the right man. It doesn’t matter if nobody else knows it.Iknow it. I found out for sure that I don’t need the flash house or the flash life to be happy. I don’t need anybody to envy me, either. They can feel sorry for me if they like, or think I’m a tramp, or whatever the latest thought is. They don’t know me, and they don’t know you. I don’t need them, but I do need Isaiah, and Casey, too. And I need you.”
A long, long moment, and then he said, “I want to marry you.”
