CHAPTER 10
Naomi
Istepped out of Le Bouchon on Decatur, where I picked up a few splits of champagne for the store and myself.
It was only May, but already the air hung thick with humidity…and tourists.
Someone was crooningSinnermanon the street corner—and there was a festive feel to the city as we prepared for the French Quarter Festival, which took over the city right before the Jazz Festival brought the crowds in.
I’d just turned right on Dumaine when I saw them, right next to Voodoo Authentica, walking shoulder to shoulder, laughing.
Move, Naomi, before he sees you.
My lungs forgot how to work for a moment, and finally, when I got my bearings, I let out a broken breath.
They were coming toward me, and any minute now, he’d raise his head and see my heart bleeding on the street corner.
I wanted to run. I wanted to hide. But I had to be able to look at myself in the mirror, so I stayed the course and walked, letting the pain run through me, wash through me, pass through me…without breaking me.
She was tall and beautiful, with legs like a dancer.
He looked relaxed, smiling that rare, genuine smile he used to give me when I’d crack some dry, inappropriate joke while straddling him in bed.
He saw me; I felt it even though I wasn’t looking his way, was making an effort not to.
The air all but crackled when we passed each other on the sidewalk, or maybe it was my imagination since he’d obviously moved on and on and on.
While I hadn’t been able to look at another man, Gage was on a date.
On a damn date!
Just the thought brought my heart to my throat, and my stomach twisted in the knot I’d been trying to untangle for months.
Maybe it wasn’t a date, I thought as I turned left on Royal.
Maybe it was someone from work.
Maybe it meant nothing.
Maybe he was just being friendly.
Or…maybeit was something.
And…maybeit was time for me to move on.
I dimly wondered if I was overreacting to simply seeing Gage with another person, and knew that no matter how many lies I told myself and my friends, I wasn’t past Gage. I wasn’t over him. Istillhurt. Istillmissed him.
The worst part was seeing him with another woman for real—and not just in my imagination, where I tortured myself with such thoughts—was a kick in the teeth, a realization that all my hopes that he’d show up and say, “Naomi, I made a big fucking mistake. I love you”were now dashed.
He wouldn’t get on his knees and rip his shirt off as he screamedNaomiwhile I looked down from my iron lace balcony. Maybe that wasn’t a bad thing. After all, Stanley had sexually assaulted Blanche, so having him be some hero in my dreams was all kinds of twisted.
Kadisha grinned at me when I came in.
“You won’t believe who was here,” she gushed.
I managed a smile for my part-time employee.
Kadisha was studying social work at Tulane and worked for me between classes and schoolwork. Since business was going well, I hired her for more hours than I needed as a way to pay it forward, doing for her what Madame Marguerite did for me.