Page 4 of Redeem
I ignore him, pretending I didn't even hear his question, and follow after my parents as they enter the Santoro house.
It doesn't take a genius to know I’m fine physically, but mentally, I just want today to be over with. I want to rewind the clock, go back to when I didn’t know Arrow had betrayed me and that my father had known where I was all along. The apartment was never really ours...it belonged to my father.
I want the life I barely had the chance to begin. But this time, I want it to be real. Not that I’ll have the chance. My father will never let me leave.
I belong to my father.
We move through the house with the Santoro men surrounding us, and a shiver works its way through my body. It never feels good being surrounded by men from other families. It feels like their closing ranks. One wrong move, and you're gone.
The cool breeze hits my face right before memories almost knock me to the ground as I step into the Santoro’s yard, which is covered in a light layer of snow. I see Emilio running after me through the massive gardens, the giggling and pounding of my heart. Remember being captivated by the roses, getting a thorn in my finger, and Emilio acting as my savior.
The roses surrounding the open coffin are blood red. I tear my gaze away, unable to look at him without dissolving into a complete breakdown. I’ve got to be strong. To put on a show of being a grieving fiancée.
My father disappears into the crowd with my mother right behind him. She talks with some of the other Santoro women. My sister stays with me until she spots her friends and practically runs toward them without a backward glance. The moment we just shared is now gone.
I only care about one person here today, but as I look around, I can’t find Emilio anywhere. I’ve stolen Angelo’s phone a couple of times to try to reach him, but neither he nor Keegan has answered.
Weaving my way through the crowd, I have to stop a couple of times to talk with people and put on the mask of a widow. Which is complete bullshit, but I give them what they want to hear just to get through this.
Finally, I make it back inside and take a look around. Since most everyone is outside, the house is quiet, and I quickly run up the stairs, taking two at a time. If Emilio isn’t downstairs, it means he's in the one place where he can hide from it all. His room. His door is shut, but I can just make out muffled voices inside. Without bothering to knock, I twist the handle and, grateful it's unlocked, I step inside, shutting the door behind me.
Both Emilio and Keegan lift their gazes to mine. Emilio is sprawled out on his bed, wearing a black three-piece suit, and Keegan’s sitting on the edge of the bed with a unlit joint between his teeth and a lighter in his hand.
“I’ve been looking for you both everywhere.” I move farther into the room. It hasn’t changed much since I was last here as a kid. Still the same king-size bed with black sheets and pillows. Everything is dark and well put together, perfect...like my own room. Emilio hasn’t lived here for years, but it’s still his room.
“Well, you found us,” Emilio says, waving his hand around the room with a clipped smile that doesn’t reach his eyes. Then I watch as his brow furrows, as if he just remembered where he is.
“I just wanted to check if you are both okay.” I sigh. This isn't how this played out in my head, but nothing with Emilio is ever how I expect.
Keegan scoffs. “Oh yeah, we’re fucking fantastic. I killed someone, and my best friend took the fucking blame. Just perfect.” He jumps up from the bed and heads to the set of sliding doors that lead to the balcony. He doesn’t say another word, just brushes past me on his way out, lighting up his joint. I’ve never seen him smoke before. His lips are pressed together in a hard line, and his signature goofy smile is gone. It throws me off a little.
I move toward Keegan, but Emilio throws his hand up for me to stop, and I do. He knows Keegan better than me. I let out a deep breath. How do I fix this? Help him?
“Just leave him, Izzy. You should go back downstairs. They'll be looking for you. I’ll see you down there soon,” Emilio says, bringing my focus back to him. He gives me a sad smile, and I hate it. I hate that this has hurt him so much. Both of them.
Realizing I don't know how to do this—how to thank Keegan for what he did, when he’s so clearly upset about it—I nod to Emilio and head straight back out the door. My heart is aching to go back to Keegan and make it all better, but I can’t.
“Thank you,” I whisper under my breath moving out the door.
CHAPTER4
ARROW
Iwatch her every move, even if I’m no longer her bodyguard. Everywhere she goes, I follow. Sometimes not physically, but I watch her. I’m drawn to her every time she comes into the room, and I want to be near her. I want to protect her, and it’s fucking killing me that I can’t. It’s not my job anymore.
My whole life, I’ve waited for this opportunity to rise in the ranks. Being her babysitter was only temporary. I always knew that. But why does it feel like part of me is gone? I’m exactly where I always wanted to be, a made man, helping run New York. I should be happy, but I’m miserable, and it’s fucking with my head.
Tipping back the glass of whiskey, it burns a line down my throat as I scan the courtyard, trying to find her again. I let out a breath when I spot her by the roses, but Angelo is nowhere in sight. He’s fucking useless. Probably off fucking one of the wives in the guest bathroom. He’ll never be able to protect her like I can. But I chose this. She was never gonna be mine, as much as I wished it. I've always known I would never be given her. She’s too valuable as a pawn in Salvatore’s empire to be given to someone like me.
She’s been searching around the Santoro’s house looking for someone, and I know exactly who—Emilio. I haven’t seen him since everything went down, but I’ve been hearing things through the grapevine about him killing Adrian. That was the deal we struck in that room, and no one has questioned it. If Maximo Santoro knew the truth, Keegan would be dead before we left this house. Santoro would never have accepted Keegan killing Adrian. We all knew it.
I may have picked Salvatore’s side when I betrayed Isabella, but I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to her. She’ll realize one day that I did it to protect her, like everything I fucking do.
It’salwaysfor her.
We wouldn’t have made it one step outta New York without Salvatore finding out, so I had to make that deal with him...just so she could have that taste of freedom she’s been longing for, for so long. She can hate me for however long it takes for her to forgive me.
Salvatore comes to stand beside me. His gaze follows mine out into the crowd. “Your job with Isabella is done. It’s now time to step up. You’re capo now.” He clasps my shoulder. “I know you see her as your responsibility. That she’s like a sister to you. That is why I gave you the job to keep her safe. I didn’t trust anyone but you.” He pats my chest, and it feels wrong. I never thought of her as a sister. Not once.
