Page 26 of Fallen Wolf
When she had righted herself and the boys took some jabs at each other. Lexi looked at me, I didn’t want to stop, I gave her my best “please, more” eyes.
“Best of three?” she challenged.
I nodded as Saint said, “We will win this Ada, hold on for the ride.” And I was… I didn’t know how I was going to let go of him. Only I knew I should, before my heart breaks. Because I knew in my whole being.
Saint wood would only break my heart.
27
Noah
Callum had been gone a week.My parents were all taking it differently. Mom had not been herself, and my dad, James, had been really trying to keep us all together. That was how he was, he was good at fixing things. When it came to more emotional support, that was my Pa’s, Nolan, area of expertise.
“I don’t think they will keep him away forever, sweetheart. I think when some things cool down over there, we will be able to go visit.” Pa tried to cheer mom up. Elijah had been spending more time protecting the pack, so he wasn’t home to deal with all of this. I had been told not to run as many shifts, but I wanted to be out there helping the pack, helping Elijah. He was my big brother and I wanted to protect him with everything I had, he was the only brother I had left. Now that Callum was gone.
“I'm okay love, it's just something I'm going to have to get used to. There had been warning signs for a while and I had ignored them.” Mom replied to Pa. They’d all agreed, there had been warning signs for a long time but they all ignored them, and Callum’s hate for Lexi was all we’d heard once she arrived in Kiba.
Pa wrapped mom in his arms and kissed her. I smiled, they were always kissing each other or touching each other in some way. Pa was very affectionate and mom loved it. She’d told me many times, that you can show love by just holding someone's hand and they were forever holding hands. And kissing as much as I didn’t want to see it.
Papa, Jace, was more intellectual. He did the accounting and stuff for the pack. He helped me with my homework. Everyone believed I looked like him, with his blue eyes and blond hair. He was tall, but not like his brother Xander, who was mom’s other mate. Papa was a little shorter, hence Big Papa was taller and I was almost taller than him.
Big Papa also known as Xander Jones, was the muscle of our family. He was a builder and liked to work with his hands. He had built mom so many things over the years, he’d added an extension onto the house only last year. It was a two-bedroom apartment. It was so if one of us sons had a mate and packmates, we could move in there. The family would be here close to us, supporting us in every way. Mom wanted grand kids, she told us all the time.
I wanted to give them to her, one day. With the right mate and packmates. But I wasn’t sure I wanted to live with my family, so I had been hoping Elijah would do that first so I didn’t have to. Although I didn’t think that would happen, he didn’t seem interested in anyone. I didn’t even know if he had dated anyone. But now with Callum gone, I was starting to look at the apartment and think about Ada living there with me… maybe Saint. I wasn’t sure about that though. I wasn’t sure I would want him as my packmate.
Saint and his family were further up the pack’s food chain, he had power over me. I didn’t like how he’d used it in front of Ada. I knew I should have told her about the patting thing, I just… I was in love with her. There was no way to describe this feeling in me, when she was around. When I was away from her, all I did was think about her, wonder what she was doing, hoping she was safe. I knew I would see her at school tomorrow.
She was swimming at the Lovell’s today and I had been told to keep away… by Saint. So, already I knew us being packmates wouldn’t work. He was an asshole to her one minute, then all flirty and it was giving me whiplash. Even if Ada doesn’t want me, I hope she doesn’t pick Saint. Unless he changed, because this was not fair on her.
“Grandma,” I called out when I saw the older, graying haired woman walk in through the backdoor. She wore a yellow hat and a matching dress.
“My big baby boy,” she called out as I bounced over to her. I wrapped her tiny frame into a hug. She always smelled like flowers and I loved her, she was amazing.
“Where’s Grandpa?” I asked. She shook her head and pointed out the back to where the woods were.
“Oh, you know that old fool, thinks he is twenty again. Shifted for a run before he came inside to comfort his children.” She reached up and patted my shoulder as she moved on to greeting the rest of my family.
My fathers all hugged her, she was actually Big Papa and Papa’s mom. She finally wrapped my mom into a huge hug on the couch. And the two of them started to talk.
“So, Noah. What has been happening? Any luck on asking that girl you like out?” Big Papa asked. I rolled my eyes, ugh, why did mom say something to them. They had been asking me this non-stop. And having four fathers meant that I was asked four times a day, and all of them had tried to give me advice.
I just shrugged. I didn’t know how it was going. Ada seemed happy when I was playing catch with her in wolf form, but then Saint was all over her, and I’d felt left out so I went home that night. I hadn’t seen her since. Only on Instagram. Like a stalker.
“I can help, give you advice son.” Big Papa wrapped his arm around my shoulder and started walking us away out to the back, where our huge jacuzzi was. Mom had wanted it, and they’d bought her a ten-seater one. I sat down on a chair and looked out into the trees, waiting for Grandpa to come. I didn’t say anything, because as much I didn’t want to admit it, maybe I did need advice because I seemed to be doing it all wrong.
“Noah, you are a great young man, and I think Ada can see this too? Yes?” I shrugged. After I made her pat me, I knew I wasn’t. I felt nothing but guilt. I let out a deep breath.
“I shifted for her...” he grunted, his way of saying continue. I think Pa might’ve been the better choice for this talk, but I continued. “I… I told her before I shifted that she could pat me.”
I waited for a response but he didn’t say anything other than “Mmm,” as he looked out and stared at the trees, they were swaying gently with the breeze.
“Did Ada know what it meant?” I turned to see Dad standing behind us now. I shook my head in shame. “Ah, son, you’re only young. You have yet to learn these things. But consent is very important. You consented to her, that she could pat you in shifter form. But you didn’t allow her the same consent in tricking her. Knowing that she had no knowledge of how that type of contact is only something that a mate or packmates do was wrong. Have you apologised?”
“I haven’t. I just ran away with my tail between my legs after Saint humiliated me in front of her. I don’t know what he wants with her, but I will try harder to be a better person. I knew as soon as I’d shifted that I shouldn’t have said that, I just like her so much...”
I slumped further into my chair, “I know she likes Saint, but she likes me too. She is just worried because of my age. I will be sixteen in two weeks. I keep telling her I will be sixteen soon....” I just trail off. I felt exposed but my chest felt lighter, no longer carrying around the guilt. I needed to find her and tell her how sorry I was. I wasn’t this kind of person, it wasn’t someone I wanted to be. I didn’t want to use lies and tricks to get her to see me. I wanted her to see me for who I was and if she can’t see me… I guess it wasn’t meant to be.
“All good things come to those who wait. You should have her over for your birthday dinner. You said you didn’t want a big party and so we are just doing a small family one. We can make sure it’s just your mom, fathers and Elijah if you want?”
