Page 77 of Look My Way
“No. It’s okay if you go a little too far sometimes.”
A muscle in my throat tightens and I swallow my next breath. “You better get down there before they send someone looking for you.”
His eyes run up and down my body, fists balling at his sides. “Yeah, because if I don’t go now then we’ll never leave this damn room.”
I wet the sheet some more with my arousal, earning me a deep groan. It only has my cock straining more and I suppress a whimper. “Don’t threaten me with a good weekend.”
His laughter is strained. “I’ll see you when you come down.”
“Okay.”
When he disappears on the other side of the door, I collapse back on the bed. Looking at the ceiling, I laugh . . . and then stare down at my throbbing erection. It’s going to take me even longer to get ready now. Got to wait until my morning visitor goes down first. That’ll give me time to respond to my messages. I send one back to my publisher first to let him know I’ll have my book sent over by then, and I tell him to keep me updated on Rick. I want to care. I do. But there’s this darker side of me that is fully okay with him suffering.
Fuck. How did I get so damn twisted in the head? Was it all the fake stalking and kidnapping talk? Technically, the first isn’t fake, since Zavier did look me up and follow me home. I keep falling harder for him every day too, despite that. We all have flaws. He has more good sides than bad and that’s what matters, right? Or am I being blindsided again?
How can it be that when I know he’s been to my house uninvited, and that he stole my curtains so he could watch me? It makes me excited whenever I think about it too. I really am deranged.
I let out a sigh, tugging at my hair as I start to write to Daniel. I delete the message, write again, and repeat until my fingers are burning. Hitting send, I slam my head against the pillow and close my eyes. I don’t open them until my phone goes off again. He wrote back faster than usual.
Me:I can’t do this with you anymore, Daniel. I wanted to wait until we were face to face to talk, but I don’t think I can anymore. I can’t marry you. I’m sorry, but what we have isn’t what I want anymore.
Daniel:Call me.
I bite my lower lip, holding back a scream.
Me: It won’t change things. It’s over. We’re over. You’re welcome to get all your things while I’m gone. It’s probably better that you do.
Daniel:Gone? Where are you?”
Me:That’s not your business to know. Not anymore. I have to go, because if we keep talking, we’ll just keep going in circles, and I’m so tired of this whole dynamic between us. I can’t keep carrying on with it.
Daniel:You’re such an ungrateful shit. After everything I’ve done for you. Everything I’m willing to give you. What about the new planters I’m having built?
Me:I’ll reimburse you for them.
Daniel:I don’t want your money. It’s not like you have much of it right now anyway. Not with how slowly you’ve been putting out books. You’ll see soon enough what a mistake you’re making.
Daniel:Don’t do this, baby. Please. Whatever it is I did, I’ll fix it. I always fix it, don’t I?
Me:There’s nothing left to fix. At least now you can have all the time you want with Jared and whoever else’s perfume you keep coming home smelling of.
I tap on his number and slam my finger on the block button before he can respond. There. He’s gone. I know it won’t get rid of him forever but at least it will this weekend. Daniel doesn’t give up easily. Zavier’s idea about having the locks changed is probably something I need to give in to.
Holding my phone tightly to my chest, I lie here with my stomach plummeting. I don’t move until my stomach stops feeling like a boulder has crash landed inside, slowly dragging my heavy body out of bed. My feet feel like they have lead in them. I didn’t want to have to do this, but he gave me no choice.I really don’t care to hear anything else he has to say. Not after all he’s done.
I dig into one of the bags and put on the first shirt I grab. It’s white with a cable design. I pair it with some gray cargo shorts, and when I look over at the nightstand I can’t help but smile, the weighted sensation slowly slipping away as I step closer and read each note left for me.
One is next to my medicine. “Take me.”
Another is next to my water. “Drink me.”
Finally, there’s one by a burrito from my favorite taco stop not far from here that reads, “Eat me.”
He’s clearly anAlice in Wonderlandfan. Will he want to have another movie night when we get back and watch that next? I want to plan as many next dates as I can until it’s impossible for us to ever run out. I’m ready to close the door on my last relationship so I can keep what’s happening between me and Zavier wide open.
Once my meds are chased down with food and water, I finish getting ready in the bathroom before rushing downstairs to the smell of lasagna. Must be what my sister made for the party. It is my nephew’s favorite food after all, and I could probably eat it every day myself. Any kind of pasta dish really, especially if it’s covered in lots of cheese, and man that ricotta has me wishing Zavier had left me more than one burrito.
“There he is.” My mom strolls toward me, giving me a half hug and kissing me on the cheek. “I was about to come up and check on you.”
