Page 50 of Halluci-Dating A Demon
“We didn’t intend for it to happen, and I realized later that I’d made a big mistake. I . . . I guess I was just scared. We moved in together and you started talking about shaking finances. It got too much for me, and I didn’t know how to talk to you with how hopeful you were. I tried to be there with you but at the time I wasn’t ready. But I’m ready now, Elias. I’ll do whatever it takes to have a chance of being with you again.” His breaths waver. “I fucked up. Adam wanted more but it was never supposed to get that far.”
“I think you should do us both a favor and not only lose my number, but also stop your visits to my parents’ house. That’s not your place anymore. You gave that up, and you can’t just decide you want it whenever you’re ready.”
“I know,” he says, choking back a sob. “I know. I can be selfish sometimes, and I want to work on that. I love you, Elias.”
“Did you not love him too?”
“No. It was one-sided. I tried to make him understand that, but he wouldn’t stop showing up everywhere I was. He didn’t want to end it and threatened to tell you if I kept pushing him away.”
“You don’t get to do that,” I say. “You don’t get to paint my brother as the only bad guy here. You were just as guilty. You should never have crossed that line to begin with.”
“Elias—”
“Basta. If you really love me like you claim, then let me go. Let me move on while you do the same. I thought that’s what you wanted anyway.”
“I . . . I was only wanting to make things right, but I see I’m too late and you have every right to want to walk away from me.”
“You walked away first, the moment you gave yourself to my brother.” I hang up the phone, not owing him another word or any more of my time.
The phone drops from my hand and I gather all the pictures. Not wanting them to ever see the light again, I put them in a pot on the stove and watch them dissolve to nothing. Too bad what they did wasn’t that. The damage will be there forever, haunting the back of my mind. My brother, my best friend in the world, hurt me more than I ever thought imaginable. My heart was breaking because of him all over again, and I have to wonder if I’d Iost him way before I thought.
Setting the pot in the sink, I run water over the ash and hit block on Brody’s number. Something I should have done the moment he started contacting me again. At first, I thought I could be friends with him, but that was when I thought I was the reason our relationship crashed and burned. I know the truth now, and I’d needed to remember what happened more than I’d realized.
Adam aimed to hurt me the day we went fishing, and he did. He didn’t consider the consequences, and probably thought the worst thing to happen would be us going our separate ways for a while. If he knew how wrong he was, would it have made any difference? Would he have done what he did anyway?
I down a few shots of tequila before heading to my room. Head groggy, my legs wobble, and I crash hard against my bed. My muscles relax and I’m temporarily unable to move, but I smile when someone hums sweetly beside me smelling of sugar.
“I was thinking I could take you to the carnival instead of you taking me. This one will be far away from here too. No worries or problems to face. Only you, me, and all the rides you can imagine.”
He kisses my cheek. “There will be a time where you’ll be ready to talk about everything you’re feeling, but tonight I want to give you a break from your own head. A break from the hurt and the pain. It can wait for later, but the cotton candy we’ll be stuffing our faces with can’t.”
My heart lights up and he holds me as I slip into the dream world he creates. A carousel goes round and round with animals I don’t recognize. I get closer and realize they aren’t animals at all, they’re creatures from his home, covered in spikes, sporting tails, multiple appendages, and differently textured skin.
There are also ones I recognize such as a werewolf, siren, and kraken. A Ferris wheel lights up above it, spinning slowly, and Arien tugs me toward the concession stands. I’m confused when we’re handed empty plastic cones, but my eyes brighten when blue fluff sprouts from the bottom, replacing all the bites we take.
“This is incredible,” I say. “And exactly what I needed.” I taste an explosion of sugar on his lips, tugging on my hoodie, while plunging a hand into the back of his pants.
Moaning, he arches his back as I rub over his hole. So much is happening around us but my eyes can’t stop coming back to him. The games and flying saucers are flashing lights around us, and the smell of funnel cake wafts in the air as Arien drags me onto a roller coaster. I shove my hand between his legs again as soon as we’re comfortably seated. Kissing his neck, my stomachswooshes as we lift in the air, and as we’re dropping down, my lips crash to his.
The exhilaration has me feeling on top of the world, and I play with his body as we sweep around in circles and glide down the rails at a faster speed before lifting up again. As we’re dropping back down, I stroke his cock harder and he cries, coming. Before I can bend down to lick up the mess, his release disappears, and he laughs.
I keep forgetting these are all illusions, but he’s not. He’s real and makes everything real around him.
***
“What a fuck dick,” Amy says. “I’m so mad, I want to fly back home just so I can punch him in his face.”
“What’s a fuck dick?” I say between laughs.
“That sorry excuse for an ex-boyfriend of yours. I only kept talking to him to be nice and because of mom, but he is definitely on my blocked list now.”
“I can’t believe he told you.” I lower myself onto the couch, dragging a pillow over my lap.
“He said he felt guilty for not doing it sooner, but what I really think happened is, he didn’t want you to be the one to tell me first.”
“Probably. Brody always likes to take control of every situation he can. I can’t believe I didn’t see what was happening around me. How did I miss the signs? We lived in the same fucking house.”
“Because you didn’t want to see it, and who the hell would? Who wants to purposely seek signs of their brother and boyfriend hooking up behind their back?” She huffs out a breath. “I didn’t think Adam could ever surprise me, but clearly I was wrong.”
