Page 20 of A Different Form of Oxygen
Twelve
Ben
I may be allowing myself to get too comfortable in Gavin's house. I bend my knees, allowing Gavin space to sit down. I let out a moan, spreading my legs out across his lap when he fills the spot beside me. He is still avoiding the other pieces of furniture in the living room, only wanting to sit on the couch I'm on. I love the weight of his hand on my ankles and the way his thumb rubs circles over the skin above my sock. “So, what are we watching? Should I make popcorn?”
I look back at the TV, flipping through the top movies on Netflix. “Popcorn would be great, but if you get up now my legs will be cold again. What movie have you not seen yet?”
He chuckles, rubbing my bottom legs with his hands, warming my skin through my jeans. His first time touching me with them has me melting at the strong forceful movements against my tight muscles. “I’m glad I’ve become your designated leg warmer. As for movies, all of them? I don’t really have a chance to watch many these days and when I get free time I usually read.”
I smile, remembering the shelves of books I saw walking in, burying the need to ask him if he can be my lip warmer too. “Ah, that would explain all the books. What is your favorite book? Let me guess, it’s going to be something likePride and Prejudiceisn’t it, or maybeDear John?”
He shakes his head with a look of amusement. “You would be very wrong. I was never much of a romance or literature guy. More like true crime and horror. Sometimes I enjoy a good fantasy book here and there too. What about you? Do you like to read about anything other than plants?”
I sit up, swinging my legs off his lap, bringing the blanket with me. I move my body closer to his so that we are once again in touching distance. His shoulder rubs against mine. I fumble with the blanket in my lap, hoping it’s enough to hide my growing erection. It’s ridiculous I let such an innocent touch have such a huge effect on me. “I enjoy reading pretty much everything. Romance, thrillers, mystery, horror. I love it all. I haven’t had much time to read anything other than my textbooks lately.”
My eyes get lost in his again, the way they did that night at the club.Tell him. Just do it already.I swallow down the words before they can come out. Knowing I would be risking our friendship, knowing there may no longer be moments like this one when he finally knows. “Should we get that popcorn now, and maybe pick a movie?”
He tilts his head to the side. “Are you getting bored of talking to me already? I want to know all there is to know about the mysterious Ben.”
I want to tell him I could never get bored of him. I could sit here next to him quietly and do absolutely nothing. Because when Gavin is near, the chaos in my head is gone. The storm finally comes to an end and I am no longer drowning in the rain of my old memories. I don’t say any of this though. My cheeks ache from my widening smile. “Oh is that right? I didn’t realize I was so interesting.”
He rolls his eyes. “Are you kidding? Just when I think I know who you are, you go and surprise me with your plants and homemade tea.”
I huff out a breath. “And what’s wrong with that?”
“Absolutely nothing. It’s refreshing; you’re like no one I’ve ever met before, Ben Gonzalez."
“What can I say, I like to keep people on their toes.”
An awkward silence falls between us and I catch myself staring at Gavin’s alluring mouth again, reminding me how good it felt to have it pressed against mine and how badly I wanted to fall to my knees for him again. His legs fall away from each other, inviting my body to move between them.
I clear my throat, hoping it will clear my own thoughts. “So, how about a thriller then?”
He looks at the TV and back to me, “Yeah, pick something while I go throw the popcorn in the microwave. Did you want another drink or are you still good on your beer?”
My eyes fall on the half empty beer I’d forgotten all about. “I’ll take a water if you have one. Also, I should probably not drink anymore if I plan on driving home tonight.”
He turns around halfway to the kitchen. “You don’t think I’m letting you drive home this late, do you? I have a spare room. You can crash in there after the movie. I don’t need you hitting any cows on the way home.”
“Yes, sir. You know, I was just joking about almost hitting a cow earlier.”
His body goes still and there’sa wave of heat in his eyes and I love putting it there.
Clearing his throat, he pulls the popcorn from the microwave. “Sure, you were. End of discussion, you’re staying here and that’s final.”
“Yes, Papi.” I freeze and know it’s too late to take back the words that left my mouth. It slipped out too easily, feeling completely natural. My bottom lip slips between my teeth and his eyes go wide, and he nearly drops the popcorn. I'm ready to come clean about our hook up after seeing the glimmer of recognition in his eyes and then it fades as he tightens his grip around the top of the bag.
Something about those words felt right, and I want to say them again. He turns around to reach for a large red bowl from the white cabinet above him. His body isn’t as close to mine when he sits back down. Ready to change that, I curl up to his side, resting my head on his stiff shoulder.
I rub my cheek against it, hoping to loosen the tension a bit. He smiles down at me before wrapping his large arm around my body, allowing me to burrow my head farther into the alcove of his side. I become more relaxed than I’ve been in a long time and I don’t want the feeling to go away. A sense of comfort washes over me as I breathe in Gavin’s scent. Here in Gavin’s arms I’m able to feel something I hadn’t been able to feel in a long time. Safe.
