Page 42 of Alone with the Beastly Duke
Would she even want me now that I have shown her just how much of a beast I am?
Jasmine was a tender and soft maiden who knew nothing about the world’s cruelty, but instead of protecting her, he had only made things worse for her by getting angry over a stupid vase.
Fine, it is not a stupid vase.
The vase was his late wife’s favorite piece of art, and when he had her things cleared out, he could not get himself to let go of the vase. When he tried to plant a flower in the vase, it died. It was pretty symbolic for him since the owner of the vase had died too.
Seeing Jasmine hold that vase so flippantly while talking about reviving some flowers in it triggered something in him that he did not even know existed. It brought to the fore the grief of his wife’s death that he had successfully suppressed.
It was at this moment that Axel realized it. His reaction to Jasmine had nothing to do with her and her action, but it had everything to do with him and the fact that he had not addressed his grief.
Axel sighed as he remembered that ever since the incident happened years ago, he still had not told anyone the truth about what had happened the night she died.
Maybe it was time I told someone what had really happened.
Axel knew what he had to do, and he got to it immediately. With boyish excitement, he raced to the London market, elated at what he was about to do. At the market, he got a bouquet, and when he ran into a bookshop, he bought two romance novels that he knew she would love.
He raced the rest of the way home, and the moment he got a stableboy to take his horse, he rushed into the house in search of her.
Axel first went to her room, but he found it empty. He went to the drawing-room, and she was not there. He panicked when he ran out of the house to the pond but still had no traces of her. Axel was fully panicking when he returned to the house.
“Have you seen Lady Jasmine?” he asked his butler.
“I suppose she is in the library where she usually stays,” the butler replied.
How could I have forgotten?
With bated breath, Axel approached the library. Once he got to the door, he turned the knob and slowly stepped into the library.
Jasmine took a glance at him as he walked into the library, flowers in one hand and a novel in the other hand. She did not seem to care for him, and he was still looking for the best word to start a conversation with when she stood up from the chair, picked up her book from the chair, and made to leave the library.
Axel immediately stepped in front of her in a bid to stop her from leaving the room. She had a deep frown on her face, and his heart tugged in guilt at the fact that he was the reason she was so unhappy.
“Could you please let me leave, Your Grace?” she said in a tone that told him that she did not care about anything he had to say.
“Not before you see what I got for you,” he said. He held up the gifts in his hands. “I thought that you might enjoy this book, and I also found this beautiful bouquet that reminds me so much of your beauty,” he said, grinning as wide as he could.
Jasmine gave him an unimpressed look before she spoke.
“Thank you for the gifts, Your Grace, but I have to insist that you return them,” she said.
Axel was taken aback. He had thought that the gifts would at least soften Jasmine’s mind enough for him to tender his apology.
“Why? Don’t you love the book? If you do not like sunflowers, I can get you some roses or even jasmine. Just tell me what you would rather I got,” he offered.
“I would rather you do not get me anything, Your Grace. Thank you very much,” Jasmine replied. “I do not need your gifts. Now, may I be on my way?”
Defeated, Axel moved away from Jasmine’s path and dropped the flowers and novels on a table in the library.
Jasmine hesitated for a mere moment before she began to walk away. Her hand was on the knob and her back to Axel when he spoke. Since the gifts did not seem to impress Jasmine, Axel decided to be upfront with the apology.
“Jasmine, no words or even gifts can convey how sorry I am for what I spoke to you,” he started.
Jasmine did not take her hand off the knob nor turn around to acknowledge him. Axel’s heart began to sink.
Can she not even spare me a glance?
Just when Axel had given up hope, Jasmine turned around, but the expression in her eyes told him that he had to apologize more. He decided to be earnest and speak straight from his heart, without caring how it made him look.
