Page 42 of Want It All
Musing about my parents’ pack, I wondered if they had it wrong. Maybe it shouldn’t have been my alpha mother calling the shots. Maybe my omega mum should have been the one making decisions about the members of her pack.
‘Seb,’ Byron started, pulling me out of that train of thought. ‘Rose.’
I glanced up at him. ‘Will you tell her that I’m not a beta?’
‘No,’ he said, flushing slightly; I assumed it was with remembered shame. ‘Not if you don’t want me to. I just … I don’t want either of you to get hurt.’
I studied him. There was genuine concern in his expression, and sadness in his eyes.
I loved my omega mum. I loved joking with her and listening to her talk about her latest inventions. She was the most permissive of all my parents, and the one who had never made me feellessabout my choices.
But I couldn’t be in the same room as her. Literally. Our relationship was largely conducted over video calls andmessages, and when I was at home, I couldn’t step foot in her room, because omegasneverhad complementary scents. To others, my mother smelled like just-baked cake – delicious, comforting, and warm.
But to me, she smelled so sweet it made me want to gag, with an edge of too-burned sugar.
Scents weren’t real. Byron didn’treallysmell like salted caramel, in the same way Tristan didn’treallysmell like vanilla, and I didn’treallysmell like cherry. Other people’s pheromone receptors just interpreted us to smell that way. If two people were compatible, then they smelled like something the other couldn’t live without. But if they weren’t a good match, they each smelled less pleasant to the other. It was the basis of how packs were formed, or not. The warring scents of omegas ensured that we were evenly distributed across packs, and meant alphas couldn’t collect us like living dolls.
I shouldn’t have evenlikedRose. She should have made my hackles rise.
I wanted to rub my cheek all over her instead. I wanted to lick her skin until she was writhing.
I couldn’t explain my need to touch her, to bury my face in her neck. I couldn’t explain the pull in my chest when I saw her. But I knew that I was living on borrowed time. I knew that it couldn’t go further, because our scents wouldn’t be complementary. When I dreamed of a pack, it hurt more than it should have to know that Rose could never be part of it.
Butshedidn’t know that, and I couldn’t bring myself to tell her, because Ineededto be close to her. It was selfish and cowardly and I hated myself for it, but I was going to draw it out as long as I could, and stay close to her for as long as possible before it all fell apart.
And what about Byron then?
His loyalty would be to Rose. He liked me, and I suspected he would probably bend me over a table if given half a chance, but he wasobsessedwith Rose. He already had an omega, and I already had an alpha. He couldn’t be pack any more than Rose could.
‘I know,’ I said at last, my stomach twisting. ‘I just can’t … I just can’t leave her alone. I know she’ll hate me for it in the end, but it’s worth it. Any time with her is worth it.’
Byron didn’t answer, but his brows drew together.
‘It’s late.’ I stood and made for the door. ‘Thanks, Byron.’
‘Seb –’
‘I’ll use scent canceller once I’m outside, don’t worry.’ I forced a smile. ‘No one else will scent you.’
His frown deepened. He opened his mouth as if to respond, but I closed the door.
I took a deep breath in the corridor, the sweetness of his scent coating my tongue. Now that I was outside, I could properly catalogue its effect on me: the warmth spreading through my body, the goosebumps on my skin, the pleasant ache of arousal building deep inside. I didn’t want to get rid of his scent; I wanted it to cling to me for days, wanted to drink it, wanted to fuckingrollin it.
But I couldn’t do any of that, so I pulled my spray from my pocket with a sigh, taking one last mouthful of Byron Griffiths before coating myself in cancellers. When all I could scent was their metallic aftertaste, I walked back to our apartment.
Tristan was waiting for me. He wasn’t pretending to read, or scroll his phone, or watch TV; he just sat on our couch, his back painfully straight, an expression on his face I’d never seen before.
Guilt.
‘You did it on purpose, then,’ I said dully.
‘I should never have thought you wouldn’t notice,’ he answered evenly.
‘Why,Tris?’ I tugged angrily on the hem of my shirt. ‘Why on earth would youdothat? Why could you possibly want her to slick in public? And why would you putbothof us in danger like that?’
‘Neither of you were in danger,’ he said. ‘Byron Griffiths has a white knight streak wider than the Pacific fucking Ocean, and he’d lose a limb before he let Rose stub her toe. If anyone tried to hurtyou, I wouldn’t be held accountable for my actions. Plus, I’d made … contingencies. You were both perfectly safe.’
‘Contingencies?’ I frowned at him. ‘What …’ I trailed off. I’d noticed the alphas dressed in black – who wouldn’t? – but I hadn’t thought anything of it. ‘You hired security?’
