Page 9 of The Devil's Bargain
His hand paused in Cal’s hair. “Are you judging us, little monster?”
“What right do I have to that?” His eyes opened again, resting on Titus unflinchingly. “You guessed correctly the other day. After I learned she was a part of that club, that she was every bit as morally corrupt as I was, a part of me hoped I could do something about it. I wanted to make her pay for her part in my self-hatred all these years.”
“And Aodhan?”
Calix was quiet for a moment. “There weren’t many signs, but there were some. I had my suspicions, but I didn’t want to believe it could be true. Those suspicions were hard to ignore due to his connection to that sort of party, but after discovering who Sister Grace really was, I also didn’t want to entertain the idea that the man I was falling for could also be a monster. Even if there was something dark about him, the likelihood that he was the serial killer I was after? It sounds insane saying it aloud, even now.”
“When did you actually figure it out then?”
“Bruce.” He dropped his gaze. “It’s not that I actually thought Aodhan did it without a shadow of a doubt. We already had our suspects, and Amory was on the run so she could very well have. But…Bruce meant something to me. Which meant ignoring my instincts when it came to Aodhan was no longer an option. I had to get off planet before I gave in and followed that hunch.”
“You didn’t want to know who he really was.” That was…disappointing.
Cal’s hand moved, resting over Titus’s thigh. “I was afraid. I didn’t know what it meant. If he was the killer, had he been playing with me? Was any of it real? Had I fallen for someone who’d been laughing behind my back, just like those kids at school had laughed?”
“Then why did you agree to meet him one last time? Why didn’t you leave?”
The corner of his mouth tipped up, but there was no humor in his expression. “That’s where Sister Grace comes in. I was going to plant the seed. If Aodhan took the bait and I eventually got word that she was dead, I would know at least part of what we had was real.”
“Would you have come back for him?”
Calix didn’t reply.
Which was answer enough.
“You were going to use him.” Titus pursed his lips. “And then discard him.”
“I didn’t know then what I know now,” Calix said. “Besides, there was a fifty-fifty chance. First, I’d have to convince him, without giving my intentions away, that he should murder Sister Grace. If he was the type of mindless killer we’d been hunting for the case, he’d do it. If he wasn’t, he wouldn’t.”
“Mindless?” Titus quirked a brow.
“Apathetic?” he tried. “You know what I mean.”
He captured Calix’s chin. “Does he feel apathetic now, Azi?”
“No. But…”
“He doesn’t feel the same range of emotion as you or I.” Titus released him. “You intended on using him, but in the end, got caught up in our web. I don’t suppose he can be angry with you for something that didn’t actually happen.”
“Didn’t it?” Calix asked. “Why do you think I agreed to go to another party?”
He hadn’t put up much of a fight…
“I wasn’tthatbored,” he added when Titus didn’t answer right away. “I wasn’t lying when I said seeing a merman sawed in half was traumatic. Don’t ever put me through something like that again. I wouldn’t have risked it and agreed if not for Sister Grace. I hoped…Well. You know.”
“We killed a lot of innocent people to have you, Cal. Offing one guilty person wouldn’t cause either of us to lose sleep at night. Why didn’t you just ask one of us to do it?” They would have killed her in an instant if Calix had mentioned it, even in passing.
“For the same reason I planned on slipping the idea to Aodhan and leaving.”
Ah.
“Right. It was a test.” Titus had known Calix was hesitant to believe they really wanted him, even after they’d told him the serial murders that had brought him to Emergence had been done with him in mind. “Why didn’t you turn her in to Bruce then? Expose the party and her involvement?”
“There was no evidence, remember? I couldn’t get anything concrete. Just an email proving she was invited to the event. Bruce wouldn’t have been able to do anything, and if I got him involved and he somehow did end up getting too close…”
Someone from the club would have silenced him, whether that was Titus and Aodhan or another member.
“He died anyway.” Sadness prickled through the connection.
