Page 68 of Love Me Like It's Real
It’s a key and he inserts it into a lock before pushing the door open and offering me his hand.
As soon as I step in, lights come on, illuminating the interior of the bus and I freeze in awe.
Like the outside, the inside is graffitied too, but there are no seats. There’s a red velvet love seat broken in half, a bedside table missing a leg with a lamp sitting on top. Strips of paper and hearts are hanging from the ceiling as well as some heart-shaped cushions and other Valentine paraphernalia.
There’s also a whole bunch of roses in one corner and several love-themed plushies in the other one. The rest of the space is littered with strips of wood, and other appliances like microwaves, toasters, an old TV and a full set of hammers. On the side, on the driver’s seat, there’s a hanger with a number of hazmat suits and helmets with goggles along the dashboard.
“Whatisthis?” I ask.
“What else do you think?” he answers and puts his hand around the small of my back making the skin underneath hotter than the rest of my body. “It’s the Smash Bus.”
I turn to stare at him. He’s so close. Dangerously close, I can almost taste him. His fragrance infiltrates my nose and sends a liquid warmth all over my body.
“A rage room but in a bus. After you told me your story last time and considering how well you acted at the cooking class, I thought you might want to smash some shit. Take out any anger for your ex on this place.”
“Oh…” I gasp and manage to peel my eyes off him. “That’s a different kind of smash. When you said release I thought you meant of a…differentkind.”
I slide my fingers up his chest, around his neck and bite my lip. Hayworth turns toward me, leaning into my touch and wraps both arms around me.
“We can do that too,” he says and dips his head.
I brace myself for a kiss but instead he licks me from my chin to my lips and makes me growl with a throbbing need that bursts inside me.
“So…” I say. “What do I do?” I pull away from his arms and turn to face the Smash Bus.
“Safety first,” he says with a smirk and hands me a hazmat suit.
I take it from him and put it on. He stands behind me to zip me up and I do the same with him before we put on goggles and helmets, grab a hammer each and go to town.
I pay particular attention to anything that can shatter. It might be loud but every time my hammer clashes with glass or metal I get this burst of energy inside me and it spurs me on. It feeds a side of me I’ve suppressed for so long for the girls’ benefit. A part of me I’ve never let show.
I’m angry. I’m just…angry. I thought I’d found my forever man and not only was he not it, he turned into my worst nightmare instead. I get Mark not wanting to be with me after my transition. I get him not wanting to be in a gay relationship because he’s always seen himself as a straight man. But for my sweet, wonderful and considerate husband to turn into a hateful, toxic monster? That I can’t take. I can’t understand. It’s not fair. It’s just not fair.
Then again, maybe it would hurt more if he’d just accepted my transition but parted ways with me. Because then I’d still be in love with him even though he wasn’t.
I don’t know. I don’t know what’s worse. I don’t know what’s fair. What I do know is this…it’s helping.
I stomp on the roses, gut a plushie or two, bash the heart cushion like a piñata and when I stop for water and air I feel…like a new man.
“How does it feel?” he asks, standing next to me just outside the bus with the top half of the suit hanging off his waist and his helmet and goggles in his hand.
“It…I don’t know. It feels good,” I say and look around us at the trees growing tall. The eerie silence of nature at nighttime.
“I knew you’d be a natural.” He rests a hand on my shoulder and it’s as if he’s thrown a match to gasoline.
I turn toward him and put a hand around his neck. My other hand goes straight to his crotch.
“I don’t think I’m done releasing…” I whisper and kiss those gorgeous plump lips as his cock grows bigger against my hand.
He drops the helmet and goggles to the ground and wraps his arms around my waist but he wastes no time in sliding them down my ass cheeks as we deepen the kiss and with it, the fire blazing inside me.
I push him back until he’s pinned against the outside of the bus, and put my hands to work, pushing the suit off his waist and then doing the same with his pants.
While I’m busy getting him naked, he unzips my suit and strips it off as if he’s angry at it being in the way and he undoes my jeans with sharp, forceful gestures.
It’s not long before both our butts are exposed to the Maplewood winter cold but neither of us are feeling the bite. Not when the heat inside us and between us, could melt all of our surroundings.
“I need you, Hayworth. I need you inside me.”
