Page 49 of Fresh Start
"How could I forget? I had a boner for the rest of the day thanks to you."
We laughed. I didn't feel guilty. It had been a good year that we had together. The secrecy had been exhilarating at the time. It had made our adrenaline even stronger, and the hard-ons so much harder to get rid of.
Thinking of the past and our relationship made me want to take Dawson again, but I composed myself. After all, we were supposed to be out here for a picnic. Well, almost.
"So, tell me about this Helen."
I started walking again, and Dawson followed suit. The sooner we got to the little cove, the better.
"What about Helen?"
"You said she fancies you. Were you never tempted to do something with her?"
"Ew, no. She's like a sister to me at this point. I'm also so fabulously gay, I could never do that to her," Dawson said.
The sun was now right above us, making me sweaty and dehydrated. I asked Dawson for some water, and my partner in crime retrieved a bottle from the picnic basket.
"What about you? Any big crushes during your career," Dawson asked.
We were almost at the cove. The splash of the waves called out to me, promising much hotter things than just a chatty trek.
"No. I've had flings and some guys I was interested in, but no real big crushes, you know? I was too busy doing fashion shows and concerts to have any time for any emotional connections with anyone. I know it sounds pathetic, but…"
"Pathetic? Have you been listening to anything I said to you last night? My sex and love life have been drier than the desert in the middle of August. You're not pathetic. At least you can walk out into the streets and hold your partner's hand and the worst thing that could happen is your pictures ending up in the tabloids," Dawson said.
"Yeah, never mind I haven't had anyone to do that with. Besides, if I did, my good old bandmates would probably find one way or another to paint it in a negative light."
How I’d ended up on such bad terms with my bandmates after six years, I didn’t know. I had hoped to make up and make peace with them, but after they almost outed me, I didn't want to speak to them ever again.
"Can I admit something really naughty?" Dawson asked.
I turned to look at Dawson and nodded, not sure what he was about to say.
"You know when you were working for Nick Grant Menswear? What is it? Fourteen, fifteen years ago?" he asked.
"Yeah," I said. “Something like that.”
"Well, I used to collect all of your pictures from the magazines."
"You did?"
"I did. I used to have erm…an album where I would put everything I collected. And I liked looking at them sometimes," Dawson said.
It was weird hearing this. I’d followed Dawson's career since we were separated, but I never thought Dawson would have kept such close tabs on mine, and not only that, but also have a collection of all my work.
"Okay, I admit this is unusual, but I don't see why that's naughty?"
"Well…" Dawson hesitated and looked around him. I looked as well, but there was no one here. We were all by ourselves. "It was a…spank bank album."
Had I heard right? Dawson's reaction reassured me that I had. He looked down at his feet and his cheeks turned a bright red.
I wasn’t sure if I should say something to make the moment less awkward for him or react to the fact that Dawson used to wank over my photoshoots.
"That is wildly…hot, and I'm so annoyed… I wasn't there to give you a hand," I finally said, stepping closer to Dawson so our pelvises, and growing erections, could grind together.
I knew countless people in the world could have used my modeling and band pictures to touch themselves, but knowing that Dawson had done it, too, made me hungry for him. Dawson looked up, and I gave him a kiss.
"You must think I'm a creep." Dawson smirked.
