Page 88 of Royal Fling
“Are you crazy? We hardly know each other. We’ve hardly spent any time together. And even if we had, he’s only doing it to save face.”
“Give him the benefit of the doubt, Luke,” Leo said.
“Give him the—You’re saying I should marry him just because hemightbe doing it for the right reasons? I don't want my life to be built around giving someone the benefit of the doubt. I want to be swept off my feet. I want to be head-over-heels-I-can’t-live-without-you kind of in love. I don’t want to get married so the media stops trashing me,” I yelled.
“Why don’t you talk to him?” Dawson asked.
“When? We’re never alone. It’s always talks about galas, journalists, suits, and whatever other crap. When would I ever speak to him?”
“I’m sure if you—”
“I can’t do this anymore, Leo. I just need to go back to my old life and try to move on, try to find the guy that will… sweep me off my feet and propose for the right reasons.”
“You’re just upset,” Leo said. “Take some time to relax, to think before you do anything rash.”
“Anything rash? I walked out on a proposal in front of the whole world. It’s too late. And you think I haven’t had time to think? All I’ve been doing is thinking. Think of how my life has changed. Think of how everything might be if we ended up together. Think of what will happen if we don’t. I could write, like, three books alone of all the crap that’s gone through my head in the last few days. Trying to be practical when all I want is to be… to ride into the sunset with him happily ever after.”
“Life is not a fairy tale, Luke.”
I threw the pile of clothes I was holding in the suitcase and turned around to Leo, seething.
“You think I don’t know that? I gave up on fairy tales a long time ago. It's just you and the rest of the family that keep bringing up a statement I made when I was barely of any logical mind, and you keep beating me with it.
“I didn’t expect to meet a prince. And just because I did, I didn’t expect him to come into my life on a white horse, save me from all my woes like I'm a damsel in distress, and ride into the sunset together. I’m not stupid. I may joke about the whole Prince Charming incident, but I don’t expect my life to be a fairy tale. I just want to be loved.”
I was out of breath when I stopped, and I collapsed on the bed trying to sooth the storm inside.
“How do you know he doesn't love you?” Dawson asked.
I looked at him and took a deep breath, sitting up in bed.
“I don’t. That’s just it. I don’t know that he does. I don’t know that he doesn’t. So how can I marry someone who I have no idea how he feels?” I asked.
Neither of them said a word. They couldn’t. They didn’t know the answer any better than I did.
“So you’re going back home?” Leo asked.
“No, I'm just airing my clothes,” I said.
“Hey, stop snapping at me. I'm just concerned about my little brother.”
“Oh yeah? Where were you in the last twenty years of my life? You weren’t concerned then,” I shouted and immediately regretted it.
Opening old wounds wasn’t fair on him, and it wasn’t fair on me. Whatever reasons Leo had for disappearing from our lives were his and his alone, and I had forgiven him.
Of course the hurt showed in his eyes, but to his credit, he didn’t storm off or flip me off.
“I’m sorry. That was uncalled for,” I said.
“No,” he said. “You’re right. But just because I wasn’t there all that time doesn’t mean I don’t care about you or that I don’t want to be here now.”
“I know,” I said, and I embraced him. “I’m sorry. The last few days have been kinda crappy.”
Dawson laughed.
“That’s putting it mildly.”
“Dawson has a house in Vermont if you want to escape from all the media frenzy for a few days or weeks,” Leo said.
