Page 36 of Claimed By Fangs and Darkness
He took a momentary pause before his eyes met mine. “I can feel it. It’s different. Like a buzz in my chest and—” he gasped, clutching at his ribs.
One of his sigil tattoos glowed faintly. I could make out its outline through his burgundy shirt.
Idris exhaled as if it were his first deep breath in days.
I smiled. “That’s your anchor. Through all of these exercises and training sessions, and for the rest of your life, that feeling is your anchor.” I tilted my head toward the younger vampires playing cards at a table over and pretending not to eavesdrop. “Everyone here has been new before. We all remember what it’s like. Every time you feel yourself sliding, come back to yourwhy.That’s what’s going to ground you and remind you who you are.”
Idris’s shoulders were hunched as he stared at the table.
“We usually turn in groups. It helps us feel less alone when we know others are going through the same painful process. As soon as Evie is able, she’ll be initiating her first round of vampires to join the clan.”
We needed all the numbers we could get. Princeton’s death had halted a new wave of recruits we’d been preparing to turn for the past year.
Idris’s eyes flashed. His laugh was strained, bitter. “None of this feels real. My body. This place. But least of all:Evie. I need to see her. I want to believe you that she’s safe and working forthe clan, but that’s the last thing I could expect from someone whobeggedme not to join only a couple of months ago.”
“I assure you it’s as hard for me to wrap my head around as it is for you,” I said.
“Not possible,” Idris snapped.
His classmates stopped talking, glancing over at us in utter shock. They couldn’t believe a new recruit, or any clan member, would ever speak to the leader of the Masked Order that way.
Or rather, the leader of the Hekate Clan.
“You’re right,” I said over the astonished murmurs. “You’re her brother. You know that Evie has been hiding from herself for a long time. But she’s not running anymore. She’s chosen to fight, just like you. If you want to see her, you’ll take your sessions seriously. You’ll keep grounding yourself, and youwillget better. Just as we all did.”
A woman from the other table cleared her throat. I gave her a nod.
“I’d never wanted anything as badly as I wanted to be turned,” she said. “But after my first bloodlust, I freaked out. I was worried I wasn’t meant for this life, that I regretted my decision. But I leaned on my new family, and they carried me through. All the anger and hunger—it doesn’t pass, not completely. It transforms into something that worksforyou instead of against you. The sooner you get through basic training, the sooner you can see your mortal loved ones.” She smiled. “And the sooner you can rip into some born scum and satisfy yourself in a way that surpasses all your wildest fantasies.”
The three men around her all nodded in agreement.
Idris shifted in his seat. His forehead crease ran deep, and in his eyes, that hunger churned. A small shadow twisted around his thumb.
“She wants to see you just as badly,” I said.
At this, Idris released a breath of tension. “ThatI believe.”
12
EVIE
“You look tired,” I said.
“Rude.” Kylo’s grin was nothing short of heart-stopping, his dimple making my stomach flutter.
He shielded from another of my shadow strikes. I’d spent the first half of my day reading in Princeton’s library, communing with the otherworld, and patching up minor clan-related spells and wards.
Kylo encouraged me to rest, but there was no time for that. The born could strike at any moment. A reality that Kylo had accepted, as his protests against my exertion fell flat.
And now we were training with my shadows at the back of his estate, building up my combat skills. The breeze and descending sun were a gentle relief from the summer heat.
“I’m worried about you,” Kylo said with a shrug. “I love seeing you strong. But I also know what that means for your future. I’m still getting used to the idea of you being anywhere near battle.”
I nodded. “Me too.”
“I’d much rather your only job description include being my spoiled good girl, but alas.”
Another shadow solidified, slamming into Kylo’s shield with such force that he skidded backward.
