Page 29 of The Illuminated
I shut my eyes and succumbed to sleep.
The first time I awoke, the room was pitch black. I didn’t know where I was, and I didn’t much care. My sleep had been as dreamless as a night sky without stars.
I barely stirred. My body was heavy like I’d taken a powerful sedative. As unconsciousness called to me, I was only barely aware of fingers brushing my hair from my face. I sighed, leaning into the touch. I reached for the hand, my fingers brushing against skin before I fell back into unconsciousness like a quick snuff of a flame.
The second time I awoke, the room was bathed in soft morning light. Strong arms wrapped around me, and it took me a few very long seconds to realize I was:
One: Not in my room.
Two: Not in Daelon’s room.
I yelped, pushing the arms away and attempting to scramble out from their grasp as they pulled me back. I writhed and flailed my elbows back into muscle.
“Áine, it’s me. Calm down.” The sound of Daelon’s voice stilled me, though his laughter did little to quell my thirst for violence. “Though you have no idea how happy I am to know that that was your reaction to the prospect of…” He trailed off.
“What the hell else would my reaction be?” I asked, breathless as my heart thudded. I wriggled free so I could turn to face him.
His face was crinkled in amusement, but it soon fell. “I don’t know,” he murmured.
“I sure hope you know,” I scoffed. Suddenly a memory or a dream floated to the surface. “Wait. How long have you been here?”
“At least an hour. Lucius said he had business to attend to today, with no elaboration as usual. I don’t think he was too keen on the idea of leaving us alone together, but I was the only one capable of the job,” he explained, stroking my cheek. “Why do you ask?”
“No reason,” I said quickly, suppressing a frown. It must have been a dream.
“I’ve missed you so much. It feels like we haven’t seen each other in so long, and so much has happened. Are you okay? You’re going to seriously send me to an early death, little witch.”
Maybe it was time to retire that pet name now that Lucius had gotten his icy cold hands on it.
“I’m fine,” I said, but the memories of yesterday told a different story. I explained what happened from the minute we left for the dungeons till my new lady’s maids helped me out of the abyss. Instead of swatting them away like Lucius, Daelon kissed my tears, and that act alone reminded me that the dark, manipulative chasm of depression told nothing but lies. Well, mostly. The Renata thing still needed to be addressed.
“What about the lightning in the throne room? You looked so angry. I knew it was you,” he said softly, grasping my hand.
I looked down at our intertwined fingers. “Lucius was telling me all about you and Renata, before I came into the picture. About how you were meant for each other and headed down the path toward handfasting. And all the kinky shit you used to do all over the castle,” I said bitterly.
“God, Áine. He’s already so suspicious. That was a big reaction,” he scolded, and it only brought my anger back up to the surface.
“Seriously?”
“Obviously he was just trying to provoke you. Why was it so easy for him to succeed?”
I pulled my hand back, and he frowned. “Maybe because he has a way of filling in the gaps of things you hide from me. Are you saying it was all a lie?”
“Yes! Well, most of it. I didn’t think you’d want to know about my past sexual exploits, especially when I’m practically being forced by Lucius to rekindle things with her.”
“Which parts were a lie? And what do you mean?” I couldn’t hide the hurt from my voice. Was Renata a part of theso much that had happenedsince we last spoke?
“Our relationship wasn’t like that. We cared for each other, but more like friends outside of, you know. But it was a mostly sexual relationship. It was something we both needed at the time. We never said we loved each other.”
I searched his eyes. “And now?”
“Lucius is suspicious, as I’m sure he’s made clear to you too. He doesn’t understand why Renata and I haven’t resumed our affair since I returned, and none of my excuses are convincing to him anymore.”
“So?” I asked, almost at a whisper.
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I’ve been stalling by building suspense. I don’t touch her. I offer just enough to make her think that I’m once again her dominant.”
“Dominant,” I repeated, but it sounded far too fifty shades of unnatural. Which I knew was hypocritical given that it was exactly how Daelon and I operated at times. But our dynamic wasn’t as cold as labels made it seem. Now that the depressive smog had lifted, I remembered clearly what Daelon and I were to each other.
